Happy Saturday Jasmine. Thank you as always. I agree that gratitude is always the best way to start the day. Keep at itš
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Need to go back and catch up! Iāll admit I was feeling pretty down yesterday and this morning, but shit happens and I have healthy ways to cope. I reached out to friends and family, I read some of a good book, I watched a movie I love (but it maybe wasnāt the best choice 
) and I cuddled with my pup. I did some silly stuff like fall asleep on the couch and screw up my neck - oops. But itās all good. My husbandās travel home didnāt go as planned and he had to stay the night in North Carolina. I had to cancel our plans for our overnight trip to Madison which was a big bummer. I have to argue for our money back after paying extra to cancel our reservation if necessary. I havenāt called back but I need to, I just really dislike those issues. Heās on the way home now though and it will cheer me up big time to see him. Iām glad I got the house somewhat tidied up last night so itās not a wreck. Iām a homebody, I love being home but I was really looking forward to this mini vacation for my birthday after this week alone. I will gladly accept having him home, he didnāt want to be delayed either, and helping him have a restful afternoon and evening. Thanks for listening to my woes, they are pretty ridiculous after having written them out, Iām grateful he is safe and almost home. Iām grateful Iām so well loved by so many people who are there for me when I need them. Iām so so grateful for this little furry baby who is a joy in my life, sweet Lupe. She misses her papa too.
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@ELY83 those are some beautiful numbers! How fun, and what a lovely post. Iām grateful to call you a friend here and to be on this journey with you. 
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Checking in on a rainy Saturday. Day 15 sober.
Having a tough day, and feeling a bit down, due to chronic sleep deprivation. My 9 month old daughter is a lot of work these days, and overall I just find everyday life is exhausting. I find I have 2 or 3 great days per week where I get lots done and have a good energy flow ā but on the other end, a lot of days I just wonder how Iām going to keep it all together.
Trying to just focus on what I have to be grateful for.
Have a great day and take care of yourself.
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So true!!
I was going to tidy the front garden today, but I decided itās okay to just do nothing today. I did prepare everything so I can do it tomorrow. I have unpacked so quickly and have everything organised and I think all the upheaval has me thinking I always need to be doing something or Iām not doing enough.
I think my sobriety needs to come first today. The front garden will still be there tomorrow and il enjoy doing it.
I think this evening after I have walked Polly (doggy) I will make food and get on here.
After all everything inside the home is done, I pushed myself so much unpacking and building furniture etcā¦ itās all done now. It still hasnāt sunk in that Iām home, and itās an exciting experience and I just have to get settled in my mind.
Yes, so tonight just do the basics, and then relax on here and reading through my posts and everyone elseās is what I need. I donāt need to tidy the front garden I want to but it can wait until tomorrow.
Thank you everyone for your messages 
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Checking in on day 461 AF.
Havenāt been on here much recently, been struggling a little bit. No temptation to drink or anything, just had a lot of family stuff happening thatās taken over all of my thoughts and energy.
Really need a holiday.
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Checking in Day 25
Feeling empowered to keep riding the sober train. Choooo choooo 
Itās a nice day here in Toronto.
Took the pup for a walk, making an apple cobbler and gonna do a bit of reading!
Grateful for second chances, my family and this community.
Sending strength and serenity to all 
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11 days weed free. 2005 days alcohol free. Lost a pool tournament last night and got pretty upset. Im not a graceful loser lol
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Lull in the storm, but itās supposed to pick back up later this afternoon and go through till tomorrow. Still have power, so thatās great!
No snow plow yet (weāre on a private lane thatās about 500m long so hopefully he takes a swipe before it starts up again or he may not push through)
Spent two hours getting the roundabout cleared and road in front of house done, so less to do tomorrow after the second half.
I prefer the rain on the West Coast of Canada to the snow on the east coast, lol.
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congrats on your 2+ weeks of sobriety. OOF ā it canāt ben easy with a 9 month old and gloomy winter days. Maybe talk to your doctor to see if you need a vitamin boost? I am sending you energy and love friend ā it will get easier. I do hope you are able to catch up on some sleep soon.
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I love that ā It is totally ok to do nothing today. Even with a nothing day you have accomplished a lot ā prep for garden work tomorrow, walk with Polly, make food, catch up on TS, stay sober for another 24 hours. Girl you should be proud. Glad you got all the unpacking done (you did do that mighty quick lol). Now it is time to breathe.
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Day 62
Chilling on the couch watching Landscapers after a day of chores. Cleaned the house, did some laundry and dyed my hair. Everything (including me) is shiny again 
Unfortunately doggo isnāt feeling too well and vomited a few times. Iām keeping an eye on him, hopefully itās nothing serious.
I love slow weekends without any appointments, especially after a busy week. The only obligation is to recharge my battery 
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Day 81. Last night was good, I was just getting ready to head out the door for the 7 meeting and autumn face timed me so I said NVM bc I wanted to talk with her, when she got on the phone I could tell something was wrong, she was very quiet and I could tell she was holding her tears back. She would keep looking over at her mother and finally I said whatās the matter babe everything is ok and she just broke down crying saying she doesnāt want me to leave and she misses me. It broke my heart, I just reassured heard I am always going to be here. Then her mom walked away and she tried whispering something in the phone. I couldnāt hear her so I just said wait for another day to tell me so she wouldnāt get in trouble. This morning I picked her up from basketball practice and she told me her mom said the same thing as always, sheās not going to let her see me on the weekends or go over to my momās anymore if she keeps crying after seeing me. Itās so fucked up of my ex and I know she says this shit bc just before autumn called last night she messaged my mom saying she regrets letting the girls stay with me bc now they wonāt stop crying. Like are you fucking stupid? Reassure your kids and let them know itās ok to feel sad. Ugh I canāt stand my ex sometimes. Autumn got to come with me and my step dad to bring me home. Addie didnāt want to come so that was ok. But yeah made it to Plattsburgh, gave autumn all the love I could in the world. Now going for a little ride on the new bike. Groceryās and stuff like that. Much love
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I was such a daddyās girl my entire young life ā¦ my parents got divorced when I was 12, and then somehow I ended up being a once a week phone call for him. Never stop doing what youāre doing. Stay strong, keep being the best dad. You canāt control her actions but you can control yours. Keep it up 
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Good job JonB.
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38 days free of alcohol
32 days free of THC
My symptoms have been really bad and they (and the anxiety of not knowing the cause) are driving me crazy. Had a full breakdown in the middle of the nightā¦ Iām so desperate for relief and answers. I have an action plan for next week of trying to get an earlier appointment but I know itās probably going to be a while before I feel better or know whatās going on. The health stuff combined with being unemployed feels too much at times. Catch myself in a lot of self pity - why canāt I catch a break. The reality is I have a lot to be grateful for, and these problems are perhaps caused by my drinking, and I definitely wouldnāt be able to address them or be as aware of them if I was still drinking. So this is still the right and best path forward. Today my wife and I zoomed with our friend who is going through chemo for stage 2 breast cancer. She is so strong and has a great attitude and puts my problems in perspective. It wonāt be this way forever. Everything is always changing.
@TrustyBird glad that my rambling helped 
@Pickles congrats on the anniversary and thanks for your post, I needed to hear that today
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Checking in day 14. Went out to meet some friends. Didnāt drink. Usually itās all I would be thinking about. My friends didnāt really drink much either a few of them had one drink and then we went for coffee. They donāt know that Iām not drinking at all now or the extent of the reason why. In the past, If I was drinking and people only had one drink and then wanted to go for coffee, Iād be annoyed (in my mind) ā¦ Whatās the point in going out if youāre not getting pissed?! But realised when I was out this time that normal people doing feel the need to be drunk all the time. They just want to go out and catch up with their friends. Not drinking this time made me realise this. And it was nice to just catch up with people rather than focusing on when Iād be getting the next drink and being annoyed at why people didnāt want to have a āwild night outā. Lots of people are being more conscious about their drinking these days, which is good as itās easier to stay sober when those around you arenāt drinking much. Passed the first hurdle ODAATā:v:t2:
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In bed now, feeling good.
Yes I really did unpack and organise so quickly. Everything is so nice and in its place. I donāt think I realise how hard I worked myself. What is good i guess is that I got to declutter and only came home from the temp accommodation with minimal stuff. So cam home with less then we left with. That has helped my mind and life so much.
I keep waking up and Iām look around and Iām like oh Iām home yayyy.
Hope you are doing well 
Iām going to read around and see how everyone is doing.
Thank you 
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Day 720
Woke up early for work. Really didnt want to go in today but I really didnt have a good reason not to. So here i am. Work is almost over anyway. 35 min to go 
Going to pick up a pizza on the way home. Then relax with my family. Not much else happening today. Hope everyonr is doing well!
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Congratulations on 2 weeks!
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