Thank You 
It is always so good to see You 
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I totally relate, you should be so proud of yourself and your progress! We’re all here to support each other. Keep going friend. I hope the heaviness lifts slightly for you.
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Thank You! 
Yes the energies transformed. I let go. No negativity left. Feeling big reliev now. Feeling blessed 
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Day 708
Potential Trigger warning
Feeling alot of emotion right now. Im feeling pretty intense sadness and anger. There is a situation unfolding back in my home city that is incredibly disturbing. Im not going to go into detail about it bcuz i dont think thats necessary. I obviously wasnt directly involved seeing how im thousands of km away but its really hitting home to me. Its bringing me back to everything that I went thru as a former sex worker. All the abuse, being drugged, held hostage at one point, and all the trauma that I was put thru with everything that came with that lifestyle. I just finished bawling my eyes out bcuz of the hurt and pain that other woman back home have endured due to this situation. I am sooooo grateful to be alive right now. That Im not missing or dead. Im so grateful that i dont use drugs to numb the shit I was going thru. Im really triggered right now. I cant unsee what i saw on those videos 
I am praying that the people that caused this get charged. Who knows how long its been going on for. And i pray for healing and peace for those that have been hurt by them. Right now, Im just very much caught up in my past. I think I need to take some time to ground myself. To do some mindfulness exercises or something. Thank you TS fam for being here. To give me a safe space to let things out. To heal and to feel heard 
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Thank you so much Jazzy. I am discussing with both peer and professional supports but I’m walking away from the conversations feeling worse lately for some reason. Imposter syndrome has been a reoccurring theme for me.
Thanks @TrustyBird that does make me smile 
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Good evening peeps!
I am on day 9 and I am feeling good. I’m a little tired this evening so I am ready to wrap up the day and go to sleep. Just wanted to come on here and do a check in. I found myself a little bored today. Journaling, puzzling, meetings and some Fortnite was fun but I still feel like I need more to do lol. Any suggestions would be great??? Welp, goodnight yall.
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You have put into words how I am feeling recently. I’m sorry you have been feeling this way too @zzz but I feel grateful to know I’m not alone and that we can have this space to share and support each other. Sending you peace and power 
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Wow, what a wild thread here this afternoon. Feels like a full moon. Or maybe I am just going a little crazy. Whatever it is, I like it.
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I am glad you are not going to leave this forum so easily this time. Arguments are bound to occur here, and thoughtful critique of each other can sometimes be useful to pull the blinders away from the group as a whole. I (sometimes) appreciate knowing if I appear to be fucking up somehow.
That reminds of this thing my college roomies and I made called the “Grip Board” . I will save that story for another time.
-Solar
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Good for you NoShame!
I have always thought that a weed addiction or issue would be very difficult to get a hold of because it would be quite easy to downplay (in thst it doesnt appear to have the grave consequences of other addictions). I love how youre aware of this dynamic at play & appreciate the challenge ot brings you. 28 days man way to go! Xo.
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Sometimes our body does need the rest, for different reasons. I think that what you are doing is taking it a day at a time, and depression is the real deal. What works for one will not work necessarily for another, and its okay to get to know who you are and what you need. Keep pushing forward, and some days we need to be gentle with ourselves. We cannot go back, inly forward. My best wishes to you.
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Just getting ready for bed. And decided to check in on my fine folks.
Work for next two days at daycare which Im happy about. Took my son skating for the first time and he did NOT like it LOL. Felt great to be on skates myself, havent been in over 10 years but it felt like riding a bike 
Going to take the kids each week to freeskate & that makes me so happy.
Feeling off rhese past few days still, but that is normal I think for what we are going through. A haze and fog where I cant quite figure out what is right, but i know what i think in my mind is right may not be and I can feel myself pushing to understand others and try to see beyond my own view. I feel i am not sure when to stand tall on things or be understanding, but I am learning that my boundaries need to be stronger then my empathy…
Xo lovely folks. Be well all of you. Xo.
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@naomi WOOT WOOT 50 days! Great work on your sober journey! 
@trustybird I’m so sorry Emilie! Wishing that he is comfortable and surrounded by his loved ones. Hugs to you friend 
@Lile01 01 Great to see you checking in Indi 
3 days is great friend. I know its hard getting the sobriety road started and you are already doing it. Need support to keep us going as the addict voice can be loud and gripping. We are here for you friend – lean on us when you feel the urges 
@zzz thank you for your beautiful share today! I am so sorry for all that you have had to endure in your past. I am grateful that you are talking about your feelings. Hoping that your depression lifts for you very soon. Your sober timer is looking great friend. I’m glad that by talking with us here helped you some.
@anon68572606 You are dealing with a lot my friend. I do hope that you get time for your own self and that you are able to reschedule the therapist meeting quickly. Sending you hugs in the mean time
@butterflymoonwoman So very sorry Dana- sounds like some horrific things happening in your home town. I am sorry that the news and images have caused you to relive parts of your past. I am grateful that you are here with us and doing so well in your recovery. So grateful that you are far removed from that lifestyle and wish safety and peace for anyone still active. A lot of emotions and memories must be rushing through you. Here if you need to talk or if you just need a hug
Grateful that you are discussing irl and getting support. So sorry that it is not helping you. I’m hoping that you find the support you need – here for you as well. Just keep putting in your best – that’s what any of us can do. The imposter syndrome is just another way your mind tries to bring negativity / anxiety into the mix so that we turn to our DOC for support. You are doing great my friend. Should be super proud.
@onlywayisup7 great work on 9 days. Great work on keeping yourself busy to avoid the urges. I find this community to be very helpful. I spend a lot of time on the threads reading and soaking up the support. Cooking / baking, home workouts, yoga, meditation, walking (if the weather is decent), coloring, self care like massages, foot soaks, or manicure / pedicure, reading are just a few suggestions to add to your list. Possibly look into a hobby that you would like to start – I taught myself to knit with YouTube and it was a life savor when I was quitting smoking – really kept my hands busy.
@bomdhil Hey Thomas – how are you doing friend? Been a while since we’ve heard from you.
Checking in on Monday evening
397 days free of alcohol and weed
812 days free of cigarettes
It has been a very productive day. I am glad that i am starting to find my way out of the negative spiral my head was in. I was able to manage some baking for the restaurant and accounting work today which felt good - hoping i did not overdo anything… i guess only time will tell. I am so happy that my brother got the internet working this evening. SOOO very happy about that. I am tired enough so will try to call it a night. Another day conquered
Wishing everyone a wonderful addiction free day / evening - sending you all so much love
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Checking in day 21. Excursion for today was rescheduled, but still gave me something to share with you. As I was packing up my bag to leave for the excursion, I realized I didn’t have my ID. Not that they would really think of carding me with my silver hair, but they made it clear on the tour info to bring ID if you were going to drink alcohol. I had already decided I was not going to fall into a trap of drinking because it was included in the price of the tour, but I figured it was a good idea to leave my ID behind to further cement that decision. I met a young man in IOP who was so good at taking extra steps to help him avoid drinking. This little bit this morning reminded me of him. I hope and pray that he is sober and doing well. Amazing young man.
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1690
Experience expertise work day ahead. I didn’t have a great night. But I love the work and I’ll make it work today. One day at a time.
It’s been quite a ride reading through the last 24 hours of posts here. Educational, uplifting, sad, hard, good, bad, it’s all here. All our experiences are here. Thanks so much for being here all. It helps so much. We’re in this together and I could never do it alone. Nobody can. And being here is no guarantee for success because we have to do the work ourselves. But it helps. Have as good a day as you all can friends. Sober and clean. Much love.
We’re the only ones who can help our depressions. Paradoxically by doing what we want to do the least. Which is to do stuff. To get out. To force ourselves out of the house. To force ourselves to do chores. To force ourselves to interact with others. I know you know. But I struggled with this myself and still do at times. It’s hard. Life’s hard. And the only way to make something good of it is by working our asses of. Especially us all here. Much love friend.
I don’t know. Maybe those people see a mirror, they see their own weakness and feel threatened? Maybe vulnerability is not the same as weakness, but I know my sort of people (which is all of you here) in general love to see me show some vulnerability. We are all weak and we are all strong. Again, depression is a b*tch, and the only way out is through. A healthy lifestyle is all. But it is not easy to get there. Take care friend.
@Deelzebub I love that one Delia. Thanks
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52 days in the bank
Up early to walk the dogs. Then had the day with the kids, supermarket then to the gym for some training for the kids. Was really proud of how they are going and trying their best.
Made some dinner for the next few nights as I’ll be back to work and life can get a bit hectic with both my wife and I doing shift work.
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Day
158 no alcohol
189 no vapes or ciggs
28.41 no form of marijuanna
Its 12:33am or 0:33 here in Massachusetts usa
I dont know what was up with me today. Its like all i do is work and on my days off i crave pot.
All i can do at the moment is get more time and hope it gets easier
All i got to do is say no to the bad wolf and feed the good wolf. Thats all i got to do
How do i feed the good wolf? Hobbies, helping people and bettering myself, online meetings too. I havnt spoke at a meeting in a very long time.
Well its time for bed as its past midnight
No excuses ever to pick up. Life is brighter sober
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341
Another day done 
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Congrats to you too sober twin, so happy to see you going strong! 
@Dazercat @MrFantastik @JazzyS thanks guys! 
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