There is no way in hell i will pick up anything that has to do with pot or any other substances
Im wayy to greatful to be here and have too much to lose
My wife reminded me how devastated id be if my baby saw me under the influence
Odaat
Works over
On my way home 
I hear ya sister. Love that pic below.
Gratitude and guided meditations are a great way to battle anxiety. But ya it does wear off over time. Iāve been doing 2 or 3 a day recently. Maybe itās the full moon a coming. And you are coming up on 30 days. Thatās HUGE!! Your addict brain is not happy with that. That 30 day milestone was a hard one for me. Keep up the great work. We got your back.
I really like this. This is recovery taking hold! Itās normal to feel those feels, and let them pass. We all know what is like to be that person or those people pissing away life early in the morning.
Checking in sober.
Iāve been doing my best ostrich impression for a while now, meaning chores, work tasks, emails etc are starting to mount up.
I managed to chip away at some of it today. Plus, I handled a stressful situation, involving a totally rammed hospital carpark, me driving round it trying to find a space for 30 minutes, missing my important appointment and scuffing the paint on someoneās car negotiating a tight turn in the car park 
I left my details on their windscreen, called and rearranged my appointment, tried not to freak out and am hoping they will be OK and that I will be able to afford to cover the damage. What a day! Iām grateful I didnāt let anxiety get the better of me. Iām so grateful I donāt want to drink to ācopeā with it all.
Day 2274 good catch @JazzyS .
The Rona has struck. First time ever having it. Quarantined at home with the kids at their moms. Luckily symptoms arenāt bad so I worked remote. My awesome partner sent me Thai food for dinner!
Aw Iām so sorry to hear this!! How are you doing?? Were you able to see a doctor? Thinking of you and sending big hugs xx 
Congrats on your 2 weeks!! Keep at it 
Big congrats on your 30 days!! 
Congrats on 4 months!! 
Funny you mention this. Iām actually watching the show Loudermouth on Netflix and there is an episode with the main character, who is sober and leads an AA group, and his father, who is not sober and they have an argument and the father says the son is just mad āthat he canāt drink like a normal personā which really stuck with me and I think this is the reason I kept going back to the drink with some relapses. It took me a while to admit that for whatever reasons genetics, brain chemistry what have you I cannot drink like a normal person. When I drink it escalates into regret and bad decisions very quickly! This acceptance is very freeing. Admitting Iām powerless over alcohol is very freeing. It may suck sometimes like you said but only sometimes right? Also I see youāre almost at the 1 year mark!! Congrats!! 
Ooof im tired A good tired but tired.
Busy 2 days at the daycare, tomorrow I am off and have paperwork for my nephew, a house to clean & bags to pack. We are taking the kids on a little trip to the city for 2 nights (I have done these trips with our daughter and pur son is asking to go now which is very cute they are really getting along so well now so it will be very fun ) & Im lookong forward to taking my girl skating Monday.
I have found the stuff with my dads family very difficult and have to be honest it weighs on me a lot. I sent money to my dad to pay the lawyer 2 weeks ago, and he still has not and that is very irritating. Mostly because its not at all new behavipr. My husband said something which really hit me is that the situatiion btw my mom, dad and I is completely unnatural - in that since my sister died and all we have had to do for my nephew. Its like i know it is but damn fuxk yeh it is. I just love when people give perspective. I reallt tried to pray on this one bc i feel like this is not what I should be focusing on. Its nothing I can change or fix, and putting energy there and thinking about things is a waste of energy and mental peace.
I was offered a FT job at the daycare, and Ive countered with some condifions so we will see what they say. They really love me (which is nice to hear and I feel super in my element with the kids & even working as a team, which is funny bc I have always been a solo workers, introvert and tejd to find small talk very tiring (its a stimulus tjing I swear Im not an asshole LOL) But i have also noticed a shift in this in the past few years, towards me wanting to be more social and enjoying more casual convos. I used to be like IF WE NOT GOING DEEP I CANT TALK TO YOU bc the energy it took for me to engage in a convo i didnt care about was just so much. But i feel less like this now.
Im findingbit amazing how much we can change and grow. It just BLOWS my mind that I am 37 and still learning new things about myself, still peeling back layers and still tryinf new things. It really does just blow my mind. I think i felt like at some point you will have it figured out, like thats adulting and being a parent like suddenly youre just like āi got thisā but nooooo lol. And yet yes? I dont. More rambling here
Anyway, my fellow sober fam. Love all of you, and everythong your diff takes & experiences bring to this table. From the empaths to the ass kickers, I get something fromnyou all XO.
I also love how AF is alcohol free and as fuxk. Makes me laugh everytime. Xo.
Thank you JP. Itās a very difficult decision because this helps us to be able to survive financially. The future is questionable now.
Iām doing good. Feeling well and in good health, just tired.
How are you holding up? You have seemed doing much better lately judging by your posts. Big hugs to you too.
Good show! Iām watching Loudermilk too
Sorry youāre struggling with this decision but you have to do whatās best for you regardless of the outcome. Glad youāre feeling better health wise. Life is exhausting so no doubt youāre tired. Not going to lie today was a tough day. But Iām almost at day 16 sober from drugs and alcohol. I had a meeting with a peer counsellor for Mood disorders which was difficult but really helped sort of some of the demons in my head. Iāll see her for another 7 weeks. Still having some intense suicidal ideation, trying my best to distract myself and reach out if I need support. And thank-you for your support
Oh no! I hope u get over it quickly and that the symptoms arent too bad
@anon68572606 sorry friend ā I do hope that you are able to find time to take care of yourself.
@catmama23 
thatās an awesome pic. Iām grateful for meditations and gratitudeās that help us battle anxiety. Yeah that milestone malady can be challenging. We are here for you love ā you are doing a fantastic job with your timers ā keep pushing forward 
So very true that we can be triggered with a delayed reaction. It has happened a few times to me with cigarettes. Iāll smell it driving or walking down the street and hours later I get hit with an intense craving. At first I would think these came out of the blue but when I started going through the day(s) I realized that I had seen / smelt it earlier and my mind registered how much I used to like itā mind is a scary place. Best to stay vigilant and aware.
@doreen1 Nicely done Doreen! 4 months is amazing work ā keep going strong 
@noshame YEAH it does ā 30 days and going strong! So happy for you Matt!
@holysquid oof ā grateful that you were able to go through the thoughts and land on relief and determination. Went through a very healthy thought process. We will have those days /times when our minds will romanticize our DOC and try to forget all the other stuff that goes with it. Happy you got to enjoy your eggs benedict 
@englishd Oh Iām sorry Derrek. Glad that the symptoms are not so bad. Hoping you heal quickly. think you shorted yourself 200 daysā¦your sober time is amazing donāt want you to miss any of your time. 2274
@jp123 sorry for the struggles ā this site is always active so do reach out if you feel overwhelmed or if the suicide thoughts return. 16+ days is great ā we do need each other to help us get our next 24 hrs. We are here for you
Checking in on Wednesday evening
399 days free of alcohol and weed
814 days free of cigarettes
I had a fairly good day. Managed to get my list of items for today completed. Grateful for another mentally positive day.
Wishing everyone a wonderful addiction free day - sending you all so much love
The Rona made me lol. We have a hardware store called Rona, and this was how I read it. Hope you are feeling better soon & that you get some nice hangs with the kiddos out of it xo.
Havenāt been on this forum as much as I should be but I have a very lovely supportive group where I share my thoughts and just wanted to let everyone here know that I am still fighting against my messed up addiction, 37 days strong and I will forever be battling, last time my record was around 80 days and at that time I messed up. I just feel now is different as I have less cravings and Iām way more positive about life. Iāve been struggling with my addiction for several years now even though Iāve just turned 22 and Iām so done to leave all these shitty past years behind me. I wish everyone the best and even more than just the best and I hope everyone the best love & affection in staying sober. Peace out!
Just know that Iām here for you and if you ever get an overwhelmingly feeling of hopelessness and/or helplessness, the people at the crisis line are literally there to just be there in anyway you may need.
Itās great to see you using the community for support.
Another day weed free, gambling free and alcohol free. The insominia is back. I also have an EXTREMELY painful cyst on my back. Iv had it for years but just recently got inflamed. Probably cuz im driving for 10 hours a day
Ugh. I cant even sit on the couch comfortably. Just adding to my stupid anxiety.