I think that dream’s a good sign. Sounds like it’s ingrained in your subconscious that you don’t want to drink.
I used to have drinking dreams a lot while I was still drinking. Once, on probation with an ankle monitor, I had one where I actually felt drunk and enjoyed it bc I hadn’t drank in a few months. I woke up scared that I was going to get in trouble. Since I’ve quit drinking now, I haven’t had one. I’ve had dreams where I’m around it and I say no to it, like in every day life, but none that rattle my resolute. I always stand my ground.
What if you fail? Nothing really. You failed once. At least you will have tried. And learned some lesson. And you can try again. And again and again. Better to try and fail than not to try at all. Our greatest weakness lies in giving up.The most certain way to succeed is always to try just one more time. Etcetera.
And the most certain way to fail is not to try. Misschien kan ik wat voor je betekenen met Nederlands. Who knows? Hugs friend.
@catmancam Thank you Cam! I’m sorry for the anxiety and depression my friend. Glad to hear that the therapy went well. Hope your therapy today went well. Hope you enjoy your bowling outing today too @lighter I know how isolating recovery can feel and how nervous we can be trying to reacclimate ourselves with society and our past lives. Sometimes we have to find new paths as our old lifestyle (friends and environment) is filled with triggers. You are not alone my friend. Here we are virtual support for you but I’m sure you can find some in real life support around you too. I also found that meet-ups for hiking and knitting helped me meet people and do activities that did not involve alcohol – possibly something you can look into for your area. So glad to see you working so diligently towards your sobriety and protecting it as well. Glad to hear that you are feeling better today. @rookie Way to go with 3 weeks friend! Keep the momentum going strong @icebear oof – sorry for the rough day. Hope today is much better – I see that you are just days away from quadruple digits! WOW – so excited for you friend… looking forward to celebrating with you soon @hillbillychris Oh I’m so sorry that it’s taking so long to get the results and I do hope that they are able to provide some answer to you and your wife so you can find some peace and closure It is totally understandable to have your emotions be all over the place and anger / rage is also understandable. I am glad that you are working on it – big hugs to you – sending comforting and soothing vibes your way. Congrats on your new fed job – hope it is exciting and a fun experience. @scorpn This is fantastic news Renee. So happy for you and your kids
We all need the inner reflecting self care quiet days – I love your analogy here. Hope you had a wonderful day Aga @holysquid 365 days is 365 days my friend and you did it! Way to go with your 1 year accomplishment Keep showing up for yourself and stacking up the days @mischa84 Oh man I know how crazy it is to be unstoppable one minute and then feel less than the next. A lot of this I attribute to hormones and with what you have just gone through I would say be kind to yourself. You do always have so much going on with three toddlers and running a household – I’m glad to hear that soon you will have more time for yourself. Love the idea of learning a new language. @moosetracks 18 months!!! Woot woot Great work friend – keep going strong
@doreen1 Hope you made it home before the storms. We have not heard from Alex since her post a few days ago. Her posts were moved to the “seeking help” category as they were talking about relapsing. Still trying to reach out to her but waiting for her to sign back in. @noshame YES!! 300 days AF is awesome friend. Keep these timers going strong – you are absolutely crushing it! @button83 Those are very scary with their realism. Great work on your 15 days of sobriety! @maxwell Sending you strength and sanity during the accounting season!
Checking in on Tuesday afternoon
Not much to say – mom is doing well and resting. i’ve been having some intense pain and hoping that it will all even out soon.
my aunt is over now to help us out which is a welcome blessing.
wishing everyone a wonderful addiction day - sending you all so much love
2 years 21 days
Its been a decent day so far. I got to the gym this morning but really struggled with getting my workout done. I think i need to start eating before i exercise bcuz i was running on fumes. I went home to shower and eat and then headed back out to the mall to get myself a couple things. That an and Iced Hazelnut Oatmilk Shaken Espresso. It was sooo good! Just heading home now. Will do a bit of cleaning before my son gets home. Hope everyones day ia going well! So many milestones to celebrate today, its nice to see
Checking in. It was a very intense day on many levels. I’m really tired, but don’t feel like sleeping yet, I have so many things on my mind. I guess I will just read around here or watch something for a distraction. Tomorrow I have a consultation with my surgeon, don’t really know what to expect. Otherwise working on separation step by step. I’m really hoping for a mentally healthier life, with no harmful relationships and some piece in the inside. I’m so glad, that that long depressed period of the last few years is over, I’m not so paralyzed mentally and am able to see clearer, so I can make these steps to build it.
Jas I like what you said. It’s bewildering all around as my whole identity was wrapped up in my job, and that job was miserable. I got out, and now can create any kind of life I want, sober too. Just new all around, and a little scary. It will be so different, and so much better than it used to be. I do like hiking, gardening, animals and the outdoors. Was thinking about joining some activities, like early morning stuff to meet sober people. I love going to coffee and breakfast too. I can’t wait to be physically recovered but it won’t be long, and if I look now I’ll know what to check out. Thank you
95 days
Early check-in. Went to the gym this morning and got a good sweat going. Just chilling at home till its time to pick up the kids from school.
Then heading off to work for nightshift.
Prayers for you and your mother. Glad she is feeling better, hope you are feeling less pain. So happy to hear your Aunt is there for support. You have such a lovely family full of support and love Jazzy. Truly blessed.
23 Days AF
Feeling super. Off to see The Melvins and Mr. Bungle tonight. Meeting a friend at a bar and I know I have nothing to worry about as I’ve been out to a bar with a friend twice recently and felt super comfortable and they were so proud of me.
Have a ripper day everyone
Hey ya’ll,
Busy day today but its so goodd being at work. Love being with the kids all day. I have a dark emotion on me, saddness but I vented to my bestie and that helps. Being at work helped abd then being hone with the family. So much to be grateful for, and trying to remenber its okay to not be okay with all the greif and loss. Its overwhelming sometimes, but I keep myself so laser focused that it isnt always apparent i an overwhelned because the part of me that gets shit done goes into overdrive.
I am proud of myself and what I have done in this time since my sister has died, and I cannot say I have ever felt that feeling of beinf proud like that. Im not sure i ever allowed myself ro feel it or just always shy from feeling proud. But I am now, back against the wall and I stood for my sister and nephew and stand for them. I think that i feel this way stronglt too bc it has surprised ne or at least been apparent that this hasnt been the response i have gotten from my family. I think my dad is a big issue here for me. Doing the right thing is not always the easy thing. Im just…learning to be proud of myself; because i wont let anyone take that from me or cheapen what I have done and will continue to do.
I read a quote that said something abput how of you sacrifice yourself for the people you love you will end up resenting them. And frankly, its just not that simple…we sacrificed one hell of a lot for my nephew, and I will be damned if that devolves into any kind of resemtment.
Just my light thoughts for the day. Happy 24 and thanks for being my vent spot xo.
Proud of you 
Glad to hear that you are feeling better today.
It is totally understandable to have your emotions be all over the place and anger / rage is also understandable. I am glad that you are working on it – big hugs to you – sending comforting and soothing vibes your way. Congrats on your new fed job – hope it is exciting and a fun experience.
Truly blessed.