Pilates kicked my butt. In a good way.
Our body and mind are never truly apart, so treat it all equally. 
Day fifty three 
Sober & smoke free
Been a good day 
boys have been paid at work , i skipped the invite to pub tonight didn’t fancy it 
having Masala chai ( tea ) instead
Im also shocked by how money ive saved 
in 53 days , about £700 probably more including socialising. Would hate to know how much ive wasted in 35 years 
Hope everyone’s good 
Oooh, coming up on a year… sweet!!
Thank you! 
Happy birthday 
Hope you have a wonderful day and 61 days is a great score
Happy happy birthday 
Motivated or not. Good days and not so good ones. There’s never a reason to drink Charlie. Good you’re here, makes me glad. ODAAT friend.
Yes you are Marie! Happy birthday!
@Davina_Davis congrats on 4+ months 
@Charlie_C feel better soon 🩵 congrats on 50+ days
@happyfeet congrats on 9+ months
@BJonns congrats on your month+
@Butterflymoonwoman I’m glad your son is doing better now 
you really are Supermom 🩵 sending you energy 
@Mno I hope your interview went well 
your current commute is definitely quite the trek!
@AgentUkulele congrats on 30+ days
@acromouse congrats on 30+ days no gluten and double digits no dairy, no overeating/binge enjoy the game festival 
I’m so sorry for what you’re going through sending strength and love 
🩵
@Juli1 congrats on 90 days maybe go back to the opticians for a re-test if you’re not getting on with your new lenses, those side effects sound awful I have astigmatism too, I can’t drive in the dark because of it and I struggle with blurry vision a lot even with my glasses, more so when I’ve been reading for a long while and when I’m tired, but often for no reason at all!
@CleanHeart it takes a long time for our brains to re-wire, but they can, keep doing what’s working for you in the meantime 🩵
@JazzyS I’m sorry about your eye, I hope you’ll get it looked over if it persists 🩵
@Laner congrats on your good news
@Mel6 congrats on 9+ months
@MrFantastik congrats on 150+ days
@Mischa84 congrats on 10 months good look with the school holidays!
@MooseTracks congrats on 600+ days
@Lighter congrats on 60+ days and happy birthday 
@SelfLove_42 congrats on double digits
@Maestro ouch! Sorry about your tooth
@Mali definitely normal, give it time. I hope your interview went well and congrats on double digits
@Mira_D so pleased to read you’re all finding your stride again, and proud of you fighting this 🩵 keep going, one step at a time 
@Mindofsobermike looks awesome, and so neat! 
@Just_Laura I hope your neck and back are feeling okay after some rest
@Danwood85 it can take a while for emotions to balance out so be kind to yourself in the meantime sending strength 🩵 congrats on double digits
@IamThechange congrats on 150+ days
1360 days no alcohol.
825 days no cocaine.
340 days no vape.
1 day no binge-eating.
Monday therapy was really hard. I spoke mostly about how difficult and abusive my relationship with my dad has always been.
I had the worst binge Monday night/Tues morning-afternoon, that I’ve ever had. £60 worth of crisps, chocolate, and biscuits.
Tuesday therapy I was fighting with a sugar coma and told the psychologist how bad my binge-eating had been since I last saw her 6 weeks ago. She was very concerned, so after our session she contacted the Adult Eating Disorder service, who I am waiting for CBT-E therapy with, they advised her to tell me to send an email detailing how things have changed for me, so I did that this morning, I also asked if they know how much longer I’ll be waiting (I’ve been waiting since last summer).
My dad came with the final van load to store in my garage yesterday evening, so I gave the rest of the sugary foods to his wife, as there was still so much left but I really didn’t want any of it. I feel bad that my dad may eat some of it (he’s diabetic like me), but he doesn’t abuse it like I do.
It feels good to have slowly crawled my way out of the sugar coma. After nearly 24hrs since I last consumed sugar, there is still a very high amount of glucose in my urine, it’s scary because even when it does finally test clear, it will still be very high in my blood, and I don’t know how long that takes to clear.
I started catching-up here at 9am, it is now nearly 7pm! It feels good to be caught-up now.
🩵
Thanks @JazzyS …I’ve been looking up local AA meetings in my area, turns out there’s a few and I’ve got an appointment with my doctor next week…I hope you had a nice day with your mum!
@Lighter happy birthday!
Thank you TragicF!
So sorry you’re struggling through that! It sounds like you’re getting help, proud of you for letting your therapist know everything that’s going on. Connection is the enemy of addiction 🫶🏻🫂
Congrats on 60 days!!! 
Much appreciated my friend 
…I’m sorry to hear about your struggles… hopefully your therapy comes through soon… in it together bud:heart: take care.
As I look back…I’m just amazed, humbled and in awe. It’s truly by the grace, kindness, compassion and love of God for every moment of sobriety.
He gave me another chance and opportunity to serve Him as I was designed and meant to be. To Him be ALL the glory and Honor. My life is completely His 
Checking in Day10. Thankful for another day sober. Today is a great day! Wifey is coming home this evening—I’m waiting on a big family supper tonight. Hahaha 
The night before last my best friend reached out to me. I mean my best best best friend. Since 1st or 2nd grade always been really close. After his grandmother and my granddad died, His grand dad and my grandmother got married when we were around 16 y/o. We haven’t talked in almost 6 years. All because when I was drinking and drugging I kicked out everyone and stayed isolated. I can admit I messed up our relationship. He sent me a message on snap chat (he didn’t have my number) saying “he must close this chapter of his life and move on, no hard feelings and I love you brother. We haven’t talked in 6 years for whatever reason. I’ve been beating myself up wondering what did I do, why isn’t my best friend talking to me and avoiding me?” I was so ashamed of what I had become. To make a long story short, I told him everything and how I didn’t know how to come to him about it, even after a year of not talking, i started getting in my own head and trying to think of how you’d respond I just kept running from you. We agreed to try and work on friendship again, you know establish a good rapport.
This is the second person God has placed back in my life. First my brother that I hadn’t talked to in 4 years and then my very best friend. I know God is doing construction in my life. So so thankful!
#ODAAT
I am grateful not only for my physical needs being met but also for the unseen ways You work in my life
Have a fantastic day everyone
Happy 24
Second check in just to show you today’s Maying (Maja in Swedish) it’s when you have Fika outside.
Almost every playground was filled with people so we ended up at a place in the forest called The Pine.
It’s the only forest area here with easy access if you have a problem to move around.
The “house” in the background is a bbq hut (Grillkåta in Swedish)
Hey sweet friend,
thank you so much.
It’s difficult.
It’s not good without correction in longterm or while driving (or cinema, supermarket, screen work), but to me it’s also not good to have correction 24.7. That’s why I got a solution with daily lenses, regular glasses and sunglasses. Of course I have normal sunglasses too. Light is difficult. Sometimes light feels like noise to me. I am digging into a high sensuality overall these days.
The old vision values were good. The first optician set the axis for the new values in one eye from 180 to 10!!! My axis is 180 and the curvature is 1.75. Diopters only 0.5 to 1.
The wrong axis on one eye causes the height of the floor to shift. Definitely with the glasses and I tested it again with the lenses. It’s only with these values!
They also didn’t adjust the glasses properly, I have a wide nose bridge, they were sitting much too high! 
I don’t know why she did that either. She was totally irritated that my brain didn’t accept the simple values from the computer measurement (so - welcome to my brain lol 
)
Then she got nervous and tried lots of things one after the other! In between, everything was double and crooked.
And I wasn’t able anymore to say if it’s fine or not. Like I smelled over 5 parfums.
By the way, smells are also loud to me. Lol.
Think it will be solved Saturday at the next appointment. I did the trial with the lenses and the adjustion of the glasses didn’t help. All shit. Old is all fine. They need to make new glasses for the glasses. I have insurance. Welcome to Germany lol.
Thanks for asking cam 
I will report how it’s going…
92 days checking in
Body is asking for rest.
So I rest.
Don’t have cravings but am still aware that I need to go back to some recovery work.
Love you guys 
