Feeling good. I know i’ve been distant and not around for a bit. Been a mixed reason why I’ve not checked in, been supporting the family of a colleague who sadly passed away whilst driving to work, difficult enough to accept any time but factor in he was only 26 makes it even more of a tragedy so in my personal time I’ve just been making memories with my kids and wife.
Main thing is I’m still here and concentrating on the one thing I have the power to change…….myself.
Yes, grounding meditation and breath work is in order . It’s good to have goals and strive, but I have to break it down or I become anxious. And miss today.
Friendly reminder from your TS moderator team. If you ever have a question about a post of yours that’s been flagged or edited, please reach out by sending a PM to @moderators and we’ll be happy to discuss further. When posting, please keep all addictions in mind as to not offend or trigger others. Thank you!
Here is a link to the rules in case anyone needs a refresher.
Day 5 check in
Tomorrow I have plans to see a comedy show with a friend. I’m planning on getting whatever is non alcoholic for the 2 drink minimum but my brain is saying “2 drinks won’t hurt”. I know it can cost me everything. I don’t understand this bargaining aspect of sobriety. Why do I always think I have discipline?! And, trust me for a month I will and blackout central will come a calling. I’m doing the work, I just want to change that narrative in my head. I just want it to click like never ever again can we drink. We’ll ruin everything and everyone close.
Checking in 128. I was so looking forward to hubby coming home for long weekend. Last week was no conflict and wonderful. Already this morning I have been called an idiot and I make his life miserable. Therapist thinks I should end marriage. Sponsor thinks I should end marriage.
The big book says hold out hope sobriety and love will overcome!!Maybe I am a foolish idiot but I will not give up. I am where I am suppose to be and personally doing great. Health (losing fat) Mind clear. I am being responsible for the first time in my life.
Im finding the binge eating a difficult thing not to do I maybe need to spend more time on the forum for it , it’s election here today and in the north of Ireland it’s mostly about what religion you are who you vote for which is a sad state of affairs in opinion and it’s the only time you’ll see a politician anyway I stop watching news and stuff a few years ago because I found it very negative on my thinking and haven’t looked back since , I’m still enjoying dipping into my cold plunge pool everyday although I haven’t done so yet today
Hoping everyone has a good day and happy Independence Day to all the Americans in the forum
Thank you @rainydays for reminding me of the insanity and the bargaining id go thru to get another drink. 1 was never enough. Thank god i was able to break the cycle of addiction and i will rest my head sober tonight
Nice work on your five days, I’m right there with ya Rainy! Day
Regarding discipline, it’s not a good idea to test it. I don’t know about you, but there is no ‘just 2 drinks’ for me, and there never will be. Once I start, I’m all in. The best way to handle this is to not even start.
The comedy gig will be fun, you don’t need drink to enhance it. You could try a couple of tasty quenchy mocktails either? I hope you have a great time
7y6m19d
I’m trying to figure out what to do with myself with the whole day off and no plans until 7pm. So for 9 hours, I will…?? Hope everyone has a happy 4th!
Day 4 check in. Went for a quick 5k step walk just to break a little sweat. I did have a deli sandwich and brownie at about 11 last night, but I won’t be too hard on myself. My drink of choice was highly caloric, times many a night, so my body is probably in a wtf state right now.
2y4m21
Morning TS! I had a really good rest last night. So much so, that i missed my alarm to wake up for the gym. Ive been finding it a struggle to workout so early. Its just not my time to exercise (9-10am is when I get my best workouts in). I did however, get my prayer and gratitude list done. And today im going to do some cleaning and go for an errand later on with my son. Thats about it. Have a great day everyone!
@Twizzlers woohoo 69 days… celebrating your amazingness today . ODAAT @Bomdhil ah thank you Thomas. Just reach out when the urges hit so that you can be reminded of the joys and beauty. The mind is so powerful…we can mold it to our will. Keep doing amazing work @binx ooh now that’s funny. Glad I was able to bring laughter to you and am on the same level with your 5 yo. Better today - thanks love. @BrOKenWolf great to see you friend
I’m sorry to hear about the loss of life. Our addictions are so cruel. Glad you can be there supporting family of colleagues and also for your own family. Much love friend @rainydays hope you have a blast at the comedy club. That stupid 2 drink min and our addict brain. You don’t need that poison! Remember we are active here 24/7 so reach out if your mind starts telling lies. Enjoy your night and be protect your sobriety @tailee17 big hugs my friend. I’m sorry that he is treating you this way. You are not an idiot and only you know your situation in its entirety. You are doing great in your sober journey. Hopefully he will find some love and kindness. You do deserve that and much more thanks love…will pass on your wishes to mum
Hmmm, fweling a bit disconnected lately so what to do what to do…connect more
Had a good feeling this morning when I woke up. I have switched my coffee to decaf and half caf from those Nespressos I was having and wow what a difference in my anxiety. NO KIDDING. The funny thing is is that I HAVE BEEN HERE BEFORE lol.
I know as well that I have anxiety arpund my nephew and mom. That is real, and I have to sit with it instead of allowing my stress to touch other things. Yes this is a good thing, but it js also very scary and stressful as well and I have to give space for that.
Kids are off at daycare and camp. Im just writing a job application fpr a position that starts in September. Its a community program for youth to match them with mentors, and I think i could be interested. I just need to see if it would be workable with the kids schedules, but lets just get the application in first
Truck is also into the shop with a massive fuckong price tag on it. Dog gone should have become a mechanic.
One day at a time, happy today to have ossues of the truck and etc. I think of the place I was in when my sister forst died, and Im in a different place now. I am starting to grieve though and its very hard, and I imagine that these feelings are also contributing to my anxiety levels…along with coffee
Off to clean the pool and then have a meeting for my nephew.
.
. It’s good to have goals and strive, but I have to break it down or I become anxious. And miss today.
anyway I stop watching news and stuff a few years ago because I found it very negative on my thinking and haven’t looked back since , I’m still enjoying dipping into my cold plunge pool everyday although I haven’t done so yet today
. ODAAT
ooh now that’s funny. Glad I was able to bring laughter to you and am on the same level with your 5 yo. Better today - thanks love.
thanks love…will pass on your wishes to mum