Hi Everyone, this is my first post on this thread. I am 30 days clear of alcohol & valium combination. Had a v ugly incident on May 8th that resulted in me losing my house and impacted my relationship with my kids. My family in the US staged an intervention and flew me over for treatment. I am here for another 30 days, then fly back to Australia.
I am scared brothers and sisters. I was so deep into active addiction and it seems like all the stuff I read on the topic of sobriety illustrates how difficult it is.
Obviously I don’t want to go back to drinking. At all. But I look back over my life and see it littered with mental health battles and substance abuse. Bad outcomes and way too much drama and stress on me and others in my life.
It feels overwhelming sometimes, the gravity of what I’m trying to do. Wondering to myself if I can make it not only for me but for my kids and family as well.
I have so many regrets and shame over my past. A lot of fear and worry about the future.
I don’t think I’m the only one who feels like this. I’m reaching out to you all. God Bless.
Congrats on your 30 days of recovery my fellow Aussie. Keep stacking up those numbers. Plenty of great information and inspiration on these boards, take it all in.
Thanks Seb. 
Congratulations!!
Why is that a thought. I dont know you, but from what I read on here it only adds pain and suffering in your life. Maybe I have missed you talk about the good things you think it brings.
Why even hope for being able too?
@kaitlynnrager Way to go Kait! 5 years is impressive work 
Keep loving and caring for yourself 
Grateful that you are no longer in that life and can see the amazing transformation that you have made. Grateful that you have overcome all these obstacles and are a badass warrior! Sorry that the thoughts of past events are creeping in. It makes sense as it was a part of your life but now you do not need it to survive. You have healthier coping mechanisms and tools. Big hugs my friend – you keep flexing those sober muscles OMG!!! This is fantastic news – so very happy for you and relieved that they are taking this situation seriously and doing something that is helpful to you.
@chase.e.u Sending you comforting hugs my friend. You are not alone. I see this message is almost a day old – hope you are doing better today. Grateful that you did talk with your sponsor and are dealing with the lowest point in your life. Grateful that you are still here with us and working on your recovery 
@timetochange Sending luck for your interviews – hope they went well!. Enjoy your weekend – hopefully you will get a chance to relax.
@bunto YEAH 24 hours of sobriety Glad you are feeling better and had an overall good nights sleep. I do dream often (don’t remember them all the time or sometimes I remember them vividly when I get up and poof they are gone). Sometimes I just have the residual feelings from the dream. I do like to discuss them when I do remember and try to decipher them (if that is even possible LOL).
@zzz Congrats on your double digits and wow – cool beans on your new truck! Driving with ease 
@lighter sorry love – sending you healing vibes and hope you start feeling better soon 
Yes – unfortunately the recovery process is not linear and it does throw you for a loop when you find yourself regressing in a way. Just started watching a funny cop show (I usually go for the serious ones) – Brooklyn Nine Nine on Netflix – not sure if you have seen but it’s a good laugh. Also rewatching some episodes of Castle on Hulu which was a good watch.
@noshame Congrats on your drivers license! 
you have some impressive time and had some good no pot time too. Just commit to 100% off – pot has nothing of substance to offer you and it always leaves you feeling like crap. Whatever you need to do to not give into that initial craving – that’s what you need to focus on. ODAAT
@catmancam Oh man that sounds awful – I wouldn’t be able to sit still and absorb anything if someone was coughing and sniffling like that (especially since Covid). Hope you are able to get in touch with your doctor and get to the root of your coughing. Yeah to getting out to see the gym – hope that all goes well. Big hugs and deep breathing my friend – Anxiety can FRO!
@nordique Should be super proud! That is amazing work friend – 4 years and going strong
@kareness 7.5 years is awesome Karen! Way to go friend – grateful that you are maintaining your sobriety through stressful times. Glad you are using your tools like AA to help you cope
@mindofsobermike Ah hell Mike that sucks! It could just be her and where she is at this point in her life. I am glad that you are reflecting but not beating yourself up over it. The right person will come when the time is right (I do believe that). Looking forward to celebrating your 7 months with you tomorrow You have come a long way with dealing with relationships and your sobriety – should be proud of yourself. Do not think of it as a forever thing – enjoy the single life and getting to know you phase.
@Ricardo1977 way to go with the switch up – end of the day does not have to end with adding poison to our bodies. Keep stacking up the days my friend – andother 24
@juli1 Way to go with passing your 3rd interview (and all in English – that’s awesome work)
@mira_d Big hugs girl – hope you are able to rest and feel better soon
@danwood85 double 4’s!! that’s awesome Dan! I’m sorry for the FOMO – that shit can suck but you are enjoying the game at home and will have a hangover free day tomorrow – the adventure sounds like fun and I’m sure it wouldn’t be if you were hungover. Hope you all have a wonderful time and yes – these feeling left out feelings will pass. You are doing great :musle:
@aussie_tiger So great to see you posting on the check in thread and way to go with your 1 month of sobriety. Grateful for a supportive family who is helping you with your recovery treatment. Keep at it friend. Know you are working towards a better life and don’t let the regrets and shame hold you back. Our lives were a mess and gratefully we are given a chance in sobriety to heal ourselves and live a better life for us and our loved ones. I do hope that you are able to put support systems and routines in place for when you return to Australia so that you are covered in your recovery Hope to keep seeing you checking in.
Checking in Friday evening
541 days free of alcohol and weed
956 days free of cigarettes
WOW - what a difference in a day. Yesterday was a full day in bed and today i woke up with no fatigue and ready to take charge and i did! Such an active morning and feeling fairly good about it. Going to relax now and chill before my sister arrives. I have an early morning air port drive for her and hoping to get some one on one time with her this evening.
I’m going to watch a nice movie on the deck while i wait!
Wishing everyone a wonderful addiction free day / evening - sending you all so much love
Welcome, posting helps me stay sober. Use us a resource and to help shoulder the weight. Sobriety isn’t difficult after a while. Early days are extremely hard so I’m glad you are rehabbing with people who know what you are going through.
Drinking is hard. Spending money we don’t have on poison to escape is hard. Waking up not knowing what we did is hard. Losing relationships is hard.
Sobriety is freedom from the mental math that drinking requires. Do I have enough for the night, the week? How many drinks has that person had? Can I have another, two? Which credit card do I put this splurge on? How do I throw up at work without anyone noticing how hungover I am?
Just for today, stay sober. The longer you can do that the stronger your sober muscles get and the easier it is. 🩷
Thank you Jasmine. . I’ll try to distract until this passes. Lots of easy or passive activities- and thanks for the new show tip! I’ll check it out.
Day 77.
A lot of stress lately. Craving hard today but staying home and going to sleep instead of buying booze.
Gonna try to relax now. 
Hope you all are having at least a managable time.
Goodnight everyone!
Hey @Noshame what makes you pick up weed? What is your thought process? Bc after the fact you feel anxiety and stupid and say never again but once symptoms subside you are tempted again. Think thru what happened and what you can do differently.
Thank you so much friend. God Bless
Do you need someone to chat to?
Checking in @Lighter how are you doing now? So true that sobriety isnt linear. I know in the beginning months what i saw as a setback demoralized me but what i realize in retrospect is that the setback helped me reinforce my sobriety tools and up my recovery.
I hope you had some relief today
Thanks for the offer but it’s getting really late over here and I’m tuckered out.
Appreciate it though
2nd check in on day 147. On here are the only real breaks I’m taking today / it’s been full on. Just gave the little girl a bath and we’re putting her down to bed before my wife and I make fish tacos for late dinner.
I’m going to do a late night workout afterward. I desperately need a decent sleep tonight!
All of these things are better sober.
Have a good night, all.
195.5days
Not quite at 196, just waiting on my brother to get here from out if town. Checking in before i get too distracted. Off to the league tonight.
Weather is good, cold but sunny. We’ll be meeting up with a few mates at a bar near the stadium before we head in. Haven’t seen some of these guys in 5+years.
I’ll be driving tonight and work tomorrow so it’ll be all good.
Day 1 for me. Starting over again…
Day 1 is better than day none. Keep posting on here and checking in. You got this!!
@jonase Double 7’s Great work Jonas! I am sorry that you are struggling today – great plan to sleep it off. The cravings do not last long. Just have to find a way to keep busy till they pass. We are here to offer support and distractions – keep going strong
@PositiveThoughts Sending hugs my friend – hope you do get a good nights sleep tonight. You are in full on go go go mode – sending strength
@brittc Welcome back friend – way to go on getting back on the sober horse – YEAH day1 – stay connected and keep stacking up the days