Checking in daily to maintain focus #67

@acromouse @Twizzlers thank you for helping to reaffirm what my tattoo means :face_holding_back_tears:
@JazzyS thank you :blush: I do struggle to see my own progress through the haze of depression. Yay for no line! My veins like to play hide and seek too :man_facepalming:t2: I’m hoping they behave on Saturday :crossed_fingers:t2:
@SKhan sorry for the circumstances but welcome back :people_hugging: congrats on day 1 :tada:
@Conor80 sorry for your loss :people_hugging::mending_heart: but welcome back :blush: and congrats on your continued sobriety :tada:
@RosaCanDo congrats on quadruple digits :tada::trophy::star2:
@SoonerSober1984 welcome :blush: congrats on 3 days :tada:
@Zse good to read from you :blush: sorry you’re feeling so nervous, and for the pressure from the CEO, not cool! I really hope you take some time for yourself asap :people_hugging:
@Lainenicole96 sending strength 🩵 congrats on double digits :tada:
@Lisa-B congrats on double digits for no binge-eating :tada:

9 Likes

@Laner I’m pleased for you and being able to recognise your progress :raised_hands:t2: :blush: safe travels home :crossed_fingers:t2:
@Wunderbar congrats on 6+ years :tada::trophy::star2::star2::star2::star2::star2::star2: that is a solid reminder you have there.
@Lefty624 congrats on your week :tada: I’m so glad your wife is supportive 🩵
@Sunny11 congrats on your month :tada:
@MrsOdh wow, way to make a first impression :man_facepalming:t2: I hope if they come again they will respect your rules :crossed_fingers:t2:

1416 days no alcohol.
881 days no cocaine.
396 days no vape.
12 days no binge-eating.

Checking-in with yesterday’s numbers…

Yesterday I did 2 loads of washing, called the doctors, got an in-person appointment this afternoon, caught-up here, did almost all of my morning routine for the first time in about a month, accepted the cats’ food delivery, trimmed my facial hair, read a chapter of the book I’m reading, and did some meditations.

I received a piece of post that made me rage. The service charge company are STILL sending the service charge bill in MY name, for the flat on which my sale completed on 16/04/2021, I have phoned and emailed countless times over this, I’ve even threatened to take legal action, and it’s costing me £84 a year to have my mail redirected (I want to be aware if a large amount of money/debt is in my name), the bill now stands at £5.5K. This time I am going to write a hand-written letter (I don’t have a printer), and send it via the ‘signed for’ service, I’m going to quote every single date and time of all the emails I’ve sent them, and say about the countless phonecalls. I don’t know what else I can do but this causes me so much stress and low-burning constant anxiety, they’ve not responded to a single one of my communications and the “debt” is just getting higher and higher, and it is not my debt! Argh. :face_with_symbols_over_mouth:

I then felt angry, sad, and depressed for the rest of the afternoon/evening, I was craving crisps so bad, but I did another meditation and came here to do my check-in on the binge-eating thread instead, then watched 2 epidoes of the show I’m watching atm. I had a bad nightmare again, all of my abusers were in it, I woke up at 3am very overwhelmed by it. Then I was in a state of half asleep/half awake, on the toilet for 4hrs :man_facepalming:t2: then I returned to my bed and was in the same state until 9:30am, so not a very restful night.

Today I have walked to the shop to finally send my postal vote off, I’ve also returned the numbing cream I’d bought since I won’t be needing that now. Now, it’s time for a shower before I drive to my doctor’s appointment.

🩵

17 Likes

Hey :wave:t2: I got 3 hours 27 mins sleep last night and 5 hours the three nights previous… :sleeping:

Can’t function.

6 Likes

Yes, that’s me today as well. It really sux. Lowering my expectations for today. I tidied up and will get short bits of exercise in here and there. Need to somehow get more tired :roll_eyes:

It’s awful but you’re in good company, TragicF. :people_hugging:

I hope you feel better as evening approaches.

6 Likes

Me too… We have a 26 mile (but thru central London so it’s the equivalent of 100 miles) journey with the cats later and all their bits and bobs. Can’t leave till 9pm either. Gonna be another late one :clock130:

Rest easy :heartpulse:

6 Likes

Day 2

Thank you everyone for your well wishes and welcoming me back. Day 1 is in the bag, don’t miss all those feelings of shame and anxiety.

I just woke up, and have a very simple day planned. Body is in a ton of pain from the accident, rest and recovery is on the menu today.

Enjoy the day everyone.

23 Likes

2y4m14d
Morning TS fam! Had a good workout this morning from 530-7am. Good way to start the day :yellow_heart: Have some grocery shopping to do this morning, cleaning in the afternoon, and just relax with my son. Its his first day of summer break :slight_smile: Not much else. Have a great day everyone! :butterfly:

14 Likes

Day 225. Had a awesome day yesterday, visited my buddy again and got to sit in on peer group and saw my old counselor. Had a good work out when i got home. Rainy day today, rode my bike and said my gratitudes. Was a little frustrated when i got to work bc they put me on a unit and this person is literally not cleaning at all, it was so disgusting and i find it very disrespectful to not just myself but our patients. I did address it with a union rep rather then my supervisor bc i do want to give the person a chance to do better, im by no means perfect and would hope someone would do the same for me. But yeah looking forward to getting home and getting a workout in. Much love to all

15 Likes

Wow, city driving! I feel like I would wreck if I drove downtown with angry, overheated drivers and traffic right now. But if I really had to, I’d be ok. Even with cats…:grinning: But only in an absolute emergency :rotating_light: haha

Glad you are getting away, and I hope it’s somewhat cooler and restful where you’re headed.

I am not making any judgments today. None! :no_mouth:

Safe travels!!:four_leaf_clover: :black_cat: :black_cat:

5 Likes

Checking in day 101. Enjoy the last leg of the week everyone!

12 Likes

Congrats. Making it through day one is the biggest one of all. If you did that one, you can do another. And one more following that one. Andsoforth. ODAAT for all of us. On we go.

11 Likes

Glad you made it back to us. Take care and focus on the goal. Little steps, day by day. Take care.

7 Likes

Checking in on day 329 AFAF.
It’s been a busy day today. I got the kids up for their second last day of school before the summer holidays here in Scotland. I went to yoga then back home for breakfast then out for a haircut. I asked for it to be really short this time. It may take a bit of getting used to. Then I had a catch up with my psychiatric nurse to took me for an ice cream and a coffee. I was able to tell her that I’m much better from the most recent depressive episode but that there’s still a kind of vigilance about me. I’m also a bit apprehensive about the upcoming holidays as it seemed that my mood was lowest during weekends and school holidays. I’m planning on sticking to a routine of starting each day with yoga during the holidays.
Tomorrow is my daughter’s last day of primary school and there is a leavers assembly and picnic afterwards. It’s going to be a strange feeling not having primary age kids for the first time in a decade.
Glad to be doing all of this sober.
Much love

17 Likes

Checking in, 81 days sober. I’ll stay sober today too.
Dreamed I drank a beer last night, it was not worth it and I was so disappointed in myself. Luckily I woke up and was relieved to remember I’ve got my sober streak still going. :upside_down_face:

20 Likes

4 months today for me. 5 months last year was the high point. My plan? Keep on going successful this time. God will help me.

22 Likes

Congratulations on 4 months :slight_smile:

8 Likes

Congratulations :clap::clap::clap:

:fireworks::sparkler::fireworks::sparkler::confetti_ball:

7 Likes

@Twizzlers Thank you very much. My friends here including you have been wonderful. Truly amazing connection with words on a screen from those who share a common goal is life changing. Probably the best thing the internet has produced.

9 Likes

Well done on 4 months! I like that attitude.

8 Likes

:waning_crescent_moon:

8 Likes