Ahw. You got me Meno! 
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Been pretty depressed lately, thankfully its been in a more lowkey way, though, and not super intense. Got through the 5 day music festival completely sober and super proud of myself for that. Just got home from work and ate, now Iâm just sitting here, probably gonna shower and sleep soon. I just feel so bored and lonely and empty. Been feeling that way a lot and itâs definitely not my favorite combination of emotions. Going to a birthday party tomorrow and not feeling ready to socialize. Iâll probably just stay for a bit and then leave early. Maybe Iâll have more fun than I anticipate, who knows. Everything just feels kind of pointless right now and empty. I think what Iâm missing is connection. I have friendships and whatnot but ever since my fiance died, nothing is the same. I dont have that deep of a relationship or feel that close to anyone anymore. It all just feels so surface-level, even when its not. Its just not enough. And i just have to live with that now. And im feeling serious lack of interest in things, nothing just seems fun right now.
Hope everyone is having a good night/morning. 
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Yes!!! The opposite of addiction is connection. You ever saw the TED talk by the guy who coined that phrase? Itâs really eye opening. Iâm going to see it again right now. Glad youâre here friend. Weâre in this together.
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Iâm sorry to hear about your job, but you are good to be shot of that shitâŠ
You have reminded me of my childhood holidays in Sunny Beach and Bulgaria. It was absolutely epic and I remember them fondly. I for one will be grateful for any photos as that place has a real special place in my heart 
enjoy it!
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EMDR can be quite remarkable with a top practitioner. My wife went through a long treatment of EMDR therapy and it was excellent for her. I hope you get gains too my friend, you deserve it. 
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Love this! Thank you for sharing itâs so true.
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Day 371. Mazey festival near us all weekend. Basically lots of food, things going on and people getting absolutely drunk out of their skins⊠All weekend. It was the festival last year where I gave up drinking afterwards. My wife had been away. I went into town at lunch for a quick pint and then ten hours later staggered home. IncoherentâŠarmed with a kebabâŠmy wife called at 9.30pm.and said I was incoherent.
A year later and Iâm sober.
We may walk down later and grab some food and see whatâs going on and then come home.
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Thanks 
of course i will share photos you have to come ones again in Bulgaria and to see the other places near to Sunny Beach 
for example - Nessebar another beautiful place to stay at the seaside Nesebar - Wikipedia
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Hey, I have stayed there as well! Nesebar is gorgeous. Am I correct in thinking there are a lot of tiny churches across that area? I have really lovely memories of walking around trying to count and find them, meeting donkeys and street cats and dogs. Eating a kind of pretzel from the street stalls. I went back in the 90s so a long time ago, but I got all my fake cassettes there from market vendors and just had the best time. I also got nasty heatstroke, but thatâs another story. I love Bulgaria. Also remember the jellyfish as big as dustbin lids and catfish in the sea when I was snorkeling. Good times 
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@wahtisnormal Congrats on getting sober through the music festival. Very impressive 
Iâm sorry your mood is so uncomfortable right now. Sometimes itâs like that. I donât like to feel like that at all. Sometimes it helps to just try and know that it will pass.
@Mno Your therapy experience sounds like something. Wow. Have a nice ride today 
Btw have you read Hariâs book about depression? I really liked it.
@Lefty624 I can only suggest you set some boundaries. I know a lot of people who donât have alcohol in their home and ask their guests also to not bring any. I find this very reasonable. After all itâs a poison. If they want to use it, itâs their choice, but they can do it somewhere else. Donât overthink it. Just keep doing your thing, one day at a time.
@SoberWalker Have fun in your yurt and maybe youâll have some pictures for us 
And the weight on the bar is just an arbitrary number. Doing the work is what matters. Have fun!
@Zse Enjoy the beach and have a great trip! 
@Kareness Thanks for sharing your phone story. It really is a matter of perspective. Our minds are strange things.
@Butterflymoonwoman Itâs so thoughtful of you to have a gift for your nurse 
@Brittc Congrats on two weeks! 
@stand_like_an_oak Congrats on your month and nice to hear you could enjoy the party sober 
@GOKU2019 Long commutes suck the life out of you. Hope today is going to be less stressful for you.
220 sugar
84 UPF
91 gluten
68 dairy
2 overeating
Did my ârun your butt offâ run for today. So feeling good about myself.
There is all kind of errands and stuff at home to be done today: laundry, taking care of my IT and plants, groceries⊠Yoga in the afternoon. Not sure about the evening, maybe cinema or a dharma meeting.
There is a city festival going on today which is quite a fun idea. Our city is oriented along a river and its steep valey which makes it more oblong than circular like most cities, like a long tube. This city festival is called âLanger Tischâ meaning long table. Basically the main throughfare along the cityâs axis is closed for traffic and instead everyone can take out their table or chairs or whatnot and bring them out into the street. There will also be music bands and all kinds of activities. This way over the stretch of some kilometers people are celebrating and having fun.
Iâm not much of a festival person - too many people for my taste. But as part of it is just down the street from where I live, Iâm going take a walk and get a taste of the partying there. Maybe even meet some friends.
Whatever this summer day may bring, letâs try for peace, kindness and freedom friends 
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210 days
Took the kids to a playground for lunch, came home and just chilled for the rest of the day.
Got a little body weight workout in.
My team was playing on TV this evening and got the win.
Hopefully the kids are feeling better tomorrow so I can go to the gym for sparring, its been a bit cold and theyâve been a bit sick for me to have them out early in the morning.
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So you know it well 
well now it doesnât have donkeys anymore 
but itâs almost the same as your memories. Im happy to hear that you love Bulgaria you will see later how is now 
i hope now to not have a jellyfish 
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Hope you have a great time Claudia and hope to see some pictures when you get back
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Happy vacation! Enjoy the yurt and your surroundings! Not to worry, this fort will be held down in your absence.
@SoberWalker you will be missed and we will see a refreshed you in a week. đ©· 
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Day 1288,
Have a good day all 
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Hi everyone, had a recent relapse unfortunately. On day 12 again now so odaat i suppose.
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820 days AF
Still struggling with facing the deep stuff. Somedays im finding myself wishing for a wine near a cosy fire [its winfer here]. I wish there was a really nice non alcoholic red wine that doesnt taste like cordial.
Any suggestions?
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Day 176 AF
I check in on the journal every single day since this journey began. For over a month every day on the rate scale Iâve placed an 8. Feeling pretty darn good but not over the top good.
I thought a couple weeks ago, man, when am I gonna be a 9 or even a 10, feeling like a million bucks mentally and physically⊠I figured out today, man I love if my everyday is an 8, if thatâs where I am now⊠no more 3,4 or 5âs, a solid 8âish.
I now see my 8âs as a huge victory when Iâve felt like that for months now. Every single day this month, an 8!!
Life is great being sober. Thanks for sharing everything that you all do! I appreciate everyone here.
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Day 391 AFAF.
Yesterday was good as it was the leavers assembly for my daughterâs primary school. However, I didnât follow my normal intermittent eating plan, and I broke my fast with a couple of sugary biscuits instead of my usual fruit salad and kefir which seemed to make me feel really unwell and lightheaded. When we got back from the picnic I had to have a lie down for a couple of hours until I felt better. Iâm glad I can let myself do that now rather than drinking my way through feeling unwell and then potentially heading for burnout.
This morning Iâve had a lie in and have now completed my puzzles in bed with coffee. All I have to do today is pick up some cheese for our pizzas tonight so I may just incorporate a nice walk while Iâm at it.
Wishing everyone an addiction free day!
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Pomegranate juice, tart cherry juice, cranberry juice. Hibiscus tea. I realize the first three may taste similar ( sweet ) to the cordial you didnât want. However. They are all delicious in their own right, are full of antioxidants and good things for you and look pretty in a glass. The hibiscus tea, either hot or added to carbonated water reduces blood pressure and is physically relaxing to many.
Nice to see you. Sorry to see youâre struggling some. Glad you posted. Happy Winter. Almond milk with hot chocolate in it is good. Hot apple cider with a cinnamon stick.
I hope youâll find something that is satisfying to you.
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