@Mno I know that street and the mosque! I used to take it to the city centre when I was visiting Utrecht last month. And thanks for reminding me that the “I don’t need nobody”-mindset is death. Enjoy your ride and the meeting.
@MrFantastik I often have this expectation of myself when I go into a new setting or situation that I have to be on top of everything and act like a pro from the get go. That has often gotten me into a lot of discomfort and stress. So I really appreciate you mentioning how other people may have been involved in a thing for far longer than me, to relax a bit, accept the nervousnes of being new and maybe just ask for help. Cause I would not expect anyone else to be a pro from the get go. Thanks!
@SoberWalker I remember when I started crossfit and lifting weights how my body shape changed significantly. I don’t weight myself, but the mirror and how my clothes did fit or didn’t was pretty clear to me. The same has been happening for a while after I started running and yoga. I too get sometimes these thoughts that my body “is not as it should be”. Especially if you are treated as female from early on we are so extremely conditioned to judge our bodies, the bodies of others and be judged. I get the discomfort. I also am grateful for you sharing this and reminding us that this is how all are conditioned and feel quite often.
@Tragicfarinelli Thank you for sharing about the fear of crying. I grew up in a place where crying was met with compassion. But I also have encountered people who react with rejection, cruelty or fear. I personally think that tears always warrant a compassionate response. First to ourselves, then to the person crying. And I believe that every healing starts with self-compassion. Tears may or may not come.
@Tyland I am sorry you have so much emotional pain to go through. I hope you will wake up with more hope for the day to come.
@Cynthia1 Welome back! I am so sorry to hear about your daughter’s passing. Cannot imagine the pain. I also would like to echo @Dirk’s thoughts: How can you honor your daughter in a good way on the upcoming date?
@SadMemeQueen Glad to hear your sh urges have lessened a bit. There is a Binge eating recovery daily check in thread (Part 2). You could join us there to share about your path.
@wahtisnormal You are doing great. Keep at it 
@DanaM56 Sometimes I feel like recovery is a bit like peeling an onion. Layers after layers and they keep stinging 
271 sugar
135 UPF
9 gluten
9 dairy
1 compulsive eating
Yesterday was already better and I did not experience any strong compulsion. And I decided to rename my counter from overeating to compulsive eating. I feel like this reflects my recovery goals better: not acting on urges compelling me to eat when I am not hungry.
Today I want to focus on the game, and later send my daughter off to her grandparents. My ex and I are having a first appointment this afternoon at couples counseling. I’m very curious how this will work out. I’d really like to get some support with our communications. Recovery Dharma in the evening to wind down.
For today let’s try to keep our hearts and minds open friends: in peace, kindness and freedom 
