Checking in daily to maintain focus #69

[CATMANCAM]

@DamianUK congrats on 60 days
@Zse enjoy your seaside vacation
@acromouse thank you, it was a difficult one, but I know that’s how it works I hope your stomach settles and I also hope game night was fun
@Laner that does sound challenging wishing you success with it
@Wakikki enjoy the party
@Jules000 congrats! so happy for you
@Rob11 your pain/suffering is palpable I’m sending strength and wishing you peace 🩵 @K_S welcome back congrats on 80 days
@Juli1 congrats on 200 days

1467 days no alcohol.
932 days no cocaine.
447 days no vape.
20 days no crisps, no binge-eating.

Therapy was really hard. I tried to speak about my mum, I didn’t say much until I felt like crying. I spoke about the photos and my observations and subsequent emotions. A lot of anger and sadness floating around in me at the minute.

I couldn’t fall asleep again last night, so once again, I was faced with the insatiable hunger from my evening meds. I also hadn’t eaten much throughout the day which is unusual for me because I dont usually skip meals due to fear of bingeing later on. I looked through the second box of photos, there were thousands. I even came across 4 photos of my first abuser, but although I felt angry and sad, I didn’t feel the need to “use” anything to deal with how I felt, quite the opposite, I couldn’t eat, so that was new. There’s one box left to look through, maybe today or tomorrow before I see my brother next week, as I am giving him all the ones without me in (because they don’t show my niece photos with me in as a child because I’m trans).

Today I am going to do my daily routine things, and I also would like to watch another episode of Sweet Tooth on the TV in the lounge, it has been two weeks already since I watched the first episode of the latest season.

🩵

[Rob11]

The connection with myself is failing. Everything is/was moving in the right direction. I have a lot of connections going on, maybe to many. People are coming to me to talk, I have trouble maintaining may boundaries I can not carry there load. Remembers me of what someone told to me not to long ago, if you get into your center people will gravitate towards you. Which seems nice, but it also is scaring and makes life a bit harder. Geus I reached the point in my recovery where things are going well and there comes the addictive voice saying hey brother that’s not we agreed upon……

[Zse]

Day #258
Hello from the seaside
Hello from Primorsko, Bulgaria
We arrived early in the morning now we are drinking coffee later will go to the beach will share later photos
Happy Sober Saturday to everyone

[MrsOdh]

I’m here, I’m alive, I’m sober and I’m happy.
Day 171.

Didn’t had the time to check in yesterday. It was a hectic day.

We drive our oldest daughter to the psychiatric hospital, they changed some of her meds and wants to do another psychiatric investigation because they think she might have some EIPS on top on everything else. They’re thinking bipolar or borderline. Which would explain a lot.

After that she needed help talking to the social service and her social worker, because there’s a risk that she might not get any money this month (Here the social service is the authority who cares about people with that kind of problems)

And then she finally needed some help buying a new phone. She smashed her other one in a rage fit.

We helped her, and as usual she got mad at us for helping her. She stayed here tonight anyway.

I’m grateful for having her here anyway. It feels more safe then her being out there with her boyfriend.

Overall we had a great day, and I ended up buying some really cute Halloween decorations. And a bottle of pumpkin spiced coffee syrup. To use later.

I also spent some time in the phone talking to ky autistic 14 y/o teacher. She wanted him to be as prepared as he could for the school start on Monday, sent over his new schedule and all. They’re doing some changes in school this year, since they’ve moved year 6 out of High school and back to middle school where it is in the rest of the country.

No changes for my 14 y/o though. His teacher made sure there wouldn’t be any, so he should feel safe.

I really appreciate that, she’s so sweet.

Today the red cross in our village is having a “Kids day” jumping castles, ponys, horse and carriage, hot dogs bbq, (Tell me you’re on the country side without telling me you’re on the country side)
So the kids who didn’t got to do anything this summer had something to look forward too and can come back to school telling their friends that they did do something fun during summer holiday.

We’re going of course, the entire village goes every year.

That’s all Folks
Wishing y’all a wonderful day.

[MrsOdh]

Sounds wonderful, I’m really looking forward to those photos. Still trying to convince the family that Bulgaria would be an amazing place for a vacation.

[Misokatsu]

Congratulations

[Misokatsu]

Day 1467

Watched the second Percy Jackson movie with my daughter, and took my son to a regular appointment this morning. Husband made lunch. I was just FBing and pissing about online this afternoon, so decided to tidy my seasonings box, did that and then did three more whole cupboards so pleased about that. I have been trying to clean up the house for years, it is still far from what most people would consider tidy, probably, but I am feeling accomplished, so that is what counts.

[Rob11]

Day 1337,

Grateful for this community, thanks for the support. Woke up feeling better, was able to center myself. However long the night the dawn will break

[Thirdmonkey]

Day 2339. Just waiting for the sun to come up so I can work out in the garden. What a change in lifestyle, As an active alcoholic, i would be passed out right now, and nothing would get done today.

Stay sober friends!

[acromouse]

@Misokatsu I remember reading somewhere about a japanese custom where people clean out their places around new year. Is this a thing or have I just made that up?
@MrsOdh Good to hear your child has a great teacher. Good teachers are such gems. Have fun at the kid’s fair
@Rob11 Good to hear you are feeling better today. And for reminding us that everything changes no matter how dark and pervasive it may look.
@Zse Enjoy your time at the beach. Looking forward to your pictures.
@Juli1 You rock!!! And you are right: What a journey!
@Just_Laura Just out of curiosity and because our system here is different: What does a college scholarship contain?
@Laner What is the language you are translating into?
@Mno It’s good to hear you can ride again. I know how imporant that can be to our mental health. Glad you could invest in your favourite self care routine
@K_S Good to see you back
@Bomdhil That quote about the neck really made me laugh And I get the loneliness in recovery. Do you have the option to join any kind of online recovery meetings? They are of great help for me. Even if I just listen in.

269 sugar
133 UPF
7 gluten
7 dairy
9 overeating

Did not get much sleep last night, but I don’t have much going on today so I’ll just take my time. Groceries are already done. My IT needs some maintenance, plants need care aswell.
I think I’m going to go to the cinema in the afternoon, Saturday has somehow become my cinema day. I used to go frequently and then didn’t go for a long time. Now I’m starting to enjoy it again.
Recovery Dharma in the evening and lots of reading in between.

For today let’s keep our hearts and minds open friends: in peace, kindness and freedom

[JazzyS]

@twizzlers Glad you are doing well – was missing you on the threads. I do find that a good swim heals me on many levels.
@tragicfarinelli Sorry your sis had to cancel. Hope you are able to enjoy your time with things you enjoy doing.
@jules000 SO happy for you – congrats.
@bomdhil For the in between times – lean on us here. I honestly find more support on this site than in real life as here everyone understands the struggles that we go through. Way to go with your 24 days! Are you able to look into a sponsor? Maybe someone that you can call when things get rough
@rob11 Big hugs my friend I can imagine that the life stresses making it harder to stay focused on Sobriety. Please do not let ANYONE take away your peace or your sober time. It does suck but sometimes we do need to cut of our blood family. Please look out for yourself (not a selfish thing but a selfcare thing). Sending you loads of strength and love! I hope you are able to set some boundaries. It is hard when the people around us suck our energy – you do need to find time for yourself Saw your update and am happy that today is a better day :
@k_s So good to see you checking in Kenny! Glad the treatment center helped. Way to go with your 80 days!
@1in8billion Thanks friend. You are so sweet to take time to post these alternatives. I have tried most but not familiar with ASMR – will look into this. Sounds like you had a great start to your day! Hope you are still enjoying your Saturday
@just_laura That is so frustrating! Sorry friend – hope today is a much smoother day
@juli1 WAY TO GO Jules! Love seeing this and celebrating your 200 days wth you you hope you are able to celebrate this milestone in a special way Muscle:
@catmancam I’m so sorry that Therapy was hard and then having to go through the pictures most definitely made it harder. Sending you love my friend – hope you have a better day today. Hope you can be gentle with yourself and practice some self care today

Checking in on Saturday morning
Had some good spurts of sleep - fueled on coffee and hoping to start day being active. I see naps in my future LOL
Gonna take it easy and go with the flow.
Wishing everyone a wonderful addiction free day - sending you all so much love

[Wakikki]

Checking in. Feeling tense. The anxiety of something happening with me during the party is present and I start getting pains telling me something is wrong in my body. Im not up for this. I dont want it to ruin everything… I dont want to be scared all the time, dont want pain all the time.

[Seb]

Maybe try and focus on some breathing techniques

[Laner]

@Cjp some good suggestions! Mental health and anxiety is so far the most difficult to translate. The concept of mental/emotional health is unknown and therefore not easily understood culturally. I’m still stumped on this one. So far all my attempted transactions are either not understood by locals or they laugh and say it sounds like a crazy persons brain. Gotta keep trying in that one. But well done on hangover! I had to make a description instead of replacing it with 1 word. Craving also needed a description but I ran it by some friends who said ‘oh like when we want certain food while pregnant?!’ So I think that was well understood albet in a different context.
Withdrawal-- still thinking about this one. Sickness after stopping to drink followed by symptoms? But this could easily get mixed up with a hangover. Sober - life free of alcohol I actually liked this translation because the same word for life is breath.
All new words/descriptions I can maybe eventually submit to the dictionary which is a satisfying feeling! Thanks for the input!

[Laner]

I’m translating first into Kyrgyz. From there I hope to translate into Uzbek and Karakalpak in the future. It’s a fascinating language but with very limited vocabulary so you mostly need to build off of descriptions or create phrases rather than single word translation.

[Laner]

135 days sober
Am checking in early today. I had a great day out. I took all the kids from the orphanage on an outting. We had a picnic out, ate lots of watermelon, grilled shashlik and played footfall! A few of my friends came with so the adult to child ration was more even and think they also liked doing this. It was really a good time and all the kids were so happy to get out and have positive attention. I’m really glad I got back into going to visit them. I also got a bit of work done by running some ‘new word’ ideas by some friends. Some of them we had a good laugh about but I’m getting there and have good ideas coming.
Now I’m in for the night and will relax. Hang on my own…am feeling the need for some antisocial time and have some good cuddles with the dogs. It was a good day off and a day out.
Hope everyone else is enjoying their day keeping sober!

[acromouse]

Mental health can be seen as the capacity to do well in life, to deal with life’s challenges and stress, to be aware of one’s one capacities and capabilities, being a helpful and skilful member of communities, experiencing one’s self-efficacy, autonomy, competence.
If the culture you are in is generally more community focused than we are used to in the western cultures it might be helpful to focus more an the individual in relation to their communities. There is this saying that the opposite of addiction is connection. So a mentally healthy person is well aware of, well connected with and well embedded in their communal interdependence, while a mentally ill person has trouble experiencing themselves as a member of community, has trouble connecting with the community and experiencing themselves as being positively embedded there and contributing to.
Just some thoughts on my part.

[Conor80]

Checking in on day 1830 , doing spring cleaning today in the house cleaning skirting boards at the moment I hate this job

[Laner]

Great thoughts! This is an extremely community based culture. Think extreme opposite of the west. I already contextualized the material to be more adapted culturally but I like the way you’re thinking about the concept of mental health in an eastern context vs western. I’m thinking I may need to create a glossery for some of these new concepts and to have a part that is focused on explaining mental health. What it looks like when healthy vs unhealthy. You’ve given some good ideas. I’m loving all the feedback I’m getting!

[Cjp]

Youre doing great work @Laner what an awesome opportunity to make a difference!