Day 4 for you yay! Keep it going. Stay here and connected.
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Thank you all, it is so lovely to be back with you all
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Checking in! 
Iām just about to go to bed! Today work has been very productive! I just put my headset in and listened to āKerala Dustā whilst getting my stuff done! I think at some point I was a bit anti-social with my colleagues, but they pay me for getting my work done, not talking about the weather and our regular work-BS-drama! Very much done with that!
I can really feel that I did a 4K run yesterday! 4K is not much, but I usually walk, so my abs are killing me today! Itās a good feeling, I need to work out more again! 
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Checking in on another rainy day. I feel blah. Iāve been cold all day, little bit of a headache, just want to sleep. I donāt feel like cooking tonight. I guess Iāll forage for leftovers or order a pizza. Itās just one of those days, but at least im sober.
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Sorry to hear you feeling blahā¦ hoping you feel better soon.
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Hi all,
4 months here and still going strong. This last weekend was a little more difficult than most and not for any real reason. I simply heard a song I really liked that I hadnāt heard in a long time and it made me remember going to the concert and I was drunk at the concert so I felt really strong beer cravings. I didnāt give in and by the next day they went away. One of the hardest things about quitting all of the times I have tried in my life before is this idea that I couldnāt fully enjoy an experience without at least having a little buzz. Like I was only capable of getting 70% joy from an experience sober. But the longer I go without drinking the more I realize I can really be happy experiencing something without drinking. I think there will be a point where I actually get more joy from doing fun things sober than I would have ever when drinking before.
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Congratulations on 4 months.
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@scorpn Sorry friend ā sending energy and love your way. Hope you find time to rest and recharge 
@acromouse Sorry the med change was so uncomfortable. Hope you are able to find regulate soon :pray Wishing you luck with dealing with the couples counselling today. Love and hugs
@catmancam Sorry friend. That sounds like a crappy mental situation. Sorry that your tools were not helping. Makes sense that the interaction instigated the urges. Sorry to hear that the meditation ended with suicidal ideations. Big bear hugs my friend. You are doing amazingly well getting through your trauma and overcoming your addictions. I want you to know how special you are. 
@saa welcome to the community friend and great work on day 2! Totally normal to feel irritated and angry. I was sooo angry for the first few months. Your body is detoxing and your mind is trying to find other coping mechanisms ā none of this is easy to deal with on top of having to live your day to day life. Keep pushing through the urges and staying strong ā it does get easier
@jennyh was just thinking about you. So good to see you checking in and with 4 days under your belt. I am sorry the past few months have been a struggle. We are here to support and help you my friend ā keep strong
@juli1 Oh my friend ā there is nothing wrong with you. I totally get feeling overwhelmed and out of place among a group of strangers. Not everyone is social and that is ok. I am sorry that you felt so uncomfortable in this setting. Not a loser either ā please get that negative thinking out of your head. You are more in connection with one on one interactions. Nothing wrong with that. Was this a work event? I usually try to find one or two people at these type of events to talk to so that I am not in a center with a group or if sitting then also try to sit at the end of the table so you are not in the center of all the conversation.
@shel75 yuck to blah feeling ā hope you are able to enjoy leftovers or pizza and have a chill night. I may follow your lead.
@kris Congrats on 4 months! 
way to go with your sober time. Yeah, the mind will play games and try to remember the āgood ol timesā when you were drinking but in reality we know that those were not so great and lead to so much worse as I know I canāt stop once I start. You are living life on lifeās terms and enjoying each moment sober ā that is awesome! Should be super proud
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Good morning sober fam,
Feeling a bit anxious/nervous about social interactions, organizing stuff, working out, staying sober, being responsible & productive. I guess itās about time. No pink cloud lately thatās for sure 
But itās not necessarily a bad thing, firstly it shows I havenāt been avoiding or drowning it out, secondly that Iām human 
thirdly Iāve been all about embracing discomfort because the greatest things can come of it! So here I amā¦ The first baby steps, learning to swim, ride a bicycle, drive, the first day at school/uni/a new job, interviews, buying a first car/house, asking someone out, initiating a kiss, striking up conversation with a stranger, starting a family, opening up about personal struggles to someoneā¦ Literally all the best things in life require some level of discomfort, but are more than worth it! So, time to jump into the day and feel alive, I know Iām grateful for it when I do.
Whoever and wherever you are right now, keep that light of yours shining, and working towards your potential friend! Odaatā¦
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Such a really nice discomfort I find!
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@Saa Welcome! Hope to see more of you. Gratitude it a good way to get away from irritation, and it sounds like you did just that. I need to do it more myself.
@JennyH Nice to see you 
. Letās get back on the sober train.
@Juli I am terrible in large groups too. I always feel on the periphary of two smaller groups at the same time. However, I am also a bit shit at the daily making calls and stuff.
@Kris I always listened to music and drank. It took me ages to be able to listen to certain songs and not associate it with drinking. It does happen eventually though.
@1in8billion Great attitude, thanks for reminding me.
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Day 954
I see my HP having my back this week. I mean He always does but this week I really see the work being done. Theres a few things that have been on my plate that have been worrying me. Yesterday the loaner wheelchair for my son was fixed so he can go to school. And today we found a pharmacy that will not only be able to direct bill (which means I dont have to pay $830 a month upfront and get reimbursed our portion) but can also deliver my sons 16 cases of formula a month, for free! So Im basically saving $50 a month by not having to take a cab to the hospital to pick it up! This will certainly help in the winter when its difficult to get outside. Things have worked out and I thank my HP for putting the right people in my path to help me.
Today i took my son to get a nice outfit for Saturday (the fundraising event im speaking at). I got him these cute dress shoes and a nice button up shirt to go with his beige cargo pants. I cant wait to see him all dressed up. At this fundraiser though, everyone gets a free glass of champagn and Im actually looking forward to saying āno, Im fine thanksā. I was concerned initally about how I would respond bcuz i thought maybe Iād stand out without having this glass of champagn in front of me, but in all honesty, no one is even going to notice lol. And I will be so happy to enjoy the event without it. It helps that hubby doesnt drink also so we both will be without. Hopefully they have other drinks available for people who dont drink.
Today, we got a new board game from the toy store so we played a few rounds of that. I got some cleaning done and now to prepare supper. Im feeling really good about things right now. I hope this lasts lol bcuz the last little while, with all these changes, have been hard on my head. Hope everyone has a good night. Love to u all!!
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Quick check in 143 days 
Everything is going fine.
Elevated leg and rest and pain which is to be expected.
On quite strong meds so not posting as its all I keep moaning about how they make me feel sick etcā¦
Just wanted to update and say recovery is going well in all areas including operation.
Been doing some of my work while resting and healing and just watching lots of movies.
Hopefully the bandages come off in a week and il see the damage.
Walking with crutches is getting easier.
Miss you all and will update again in few days.
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Hi, Iām checking in as I had drinking thoughts on the way home today. Not strong, but I was standing there pumping gas outside and I looked through the windows at the beer displays, and people walking out with beer. For a second I wondered if I should go in. It was a hot day, I was just finished with another great swimming workout, I am making progress in every area of my life ā¦but sometimes now I get these twinges and thoughts that itās not enough, that Iām not doing enough. Itās the little voice that sabotages you! Oh do shut up! You might think that it only talks to you on Day 1 or 44 or 99, when things are super difficult but it waited till I started doing a lot better.
After I glanced through the window at the beer display, while I still had the gas pump running, I quickly turned to look at the beautiful clouds and a red-tailed hawk flying overhead. It was automatic. If I drank I would miss these things. They wouldnāt hit the same. The good things in life. Then they are all completely taken from you and all that remains is bleak ennui. I drove home without stopping again.
No, this life is better 
so much better
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Day 54 and still going. Spent the weekend with the family in Ann Arbor and saw the Wolverines beat USC Saturday. Occasional drinking thoughts come and go but I always try to focus on what it would feel like if I binged for a night.That scares the crap out of me.
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@Twizzlers Iām very happy to hear from you and that things are going well with your recovery. Big hugs and weāll be thinking of you 
. Check in when you can and rest up
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Glad you faught the twinge. I still buy beer for hubby and it sits outside in a fridge. Not a problem for me because I had and have 1 DRINK OF CHOICE. Beer aināt it. Although couple days ago I stopped and looked at 12 pack and thought I donāt want you even if I could drink like other people. Really good feeling to know I can abstain and continue to flourish in sobriety. You stay strong Girl. Have you started your patrol yet? Do you get a badge? Just curious.
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I canāt believe Iāve come from drinking half a fifth of vodka a day to being two weeks clean. Itās been such a struggleāsome days feel like a mental roller coaster, and I wasnāt sure I could make it. But learning from all of you in this group and hearing your stories has been incredibly inspiring. Thank you all for sharing your journeys and helping me stay on track.
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Oh that is great! Congrats on your 2 weeks of sobriety Rich! Way to keep pushing through those hard moments. It does get easier. 
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Great to hear from you friend Glad you are ok and recovering / healing. Watching movies is a great way to rest during recovery. Hope the side effects from the meds donāt last long.
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