That sounds incredibly tough 
Im sorry that youre having to be subjected to that. Sounds like hes projecting his crappy mood onto you, which isnt fair at all. Ive lived with someone who used to constantly critisize Every. Single. Thing. I did. And it wore me down. I hope that venting on here helped. I hope that ur able to find some peace and quiet tonight. Know that what ur doing IS enough. You ARE enough 
hugs friend.
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Hi sober fam 
Turns out Iāll need to hang around Adelaide a little longer than Iād planned (2-3 weeks) before I can move on as I need to renew my drivers licenseā¦
Might have a look what volunteer work is in the area in the meantime, could be a good experience. Something with animals might be niceā¦ Thereās also something called āwwoofingā here which I might look into (getting paid to bark with peopleās dogs, would need a license thoughā¦ Jokes 
itās just free accommodation and sometimes food in return for an hour or two of chores/work).
Got heaps to keep me busy, at least this coming week with lodging a formal complaint against the dodgy mechanic, repairing a windscreen crack (lucky Iād insured it), buying rain/winter things, a visit to a private doctor (also lucky its free in australia)ā¦ So will be kept busy.
Someone also responded to my post to join my travel for a bit, but will have to see now that Iām staying longer than planned for the licenseā¦
Anyways, stay sober guys, life really does begin at the edge of your comfort zoneā¦ 
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Thank you. Realization of why I drank comes to light so much now sober. He is incredibly mean and cruel with his words. I canāt make any huge decisions at this time!
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Hey friend - so good to see you checking in. Wonderful job on 5 months of sobriety 
Great to hear that you are doing better and are no longer in need of the hard pain killers. Be gentle with yourself my friend - a major surgery does take a toll on you. It does take time to heal and recover. 
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Oh hun iām so sorry. It has to be touch having to deal with this attitude over and over again. Know that you are doing great. It would be hard to not be bothered by these cruel actions and words. Sending you hugs and love.
I totally agree with all that Dana said - you are enough and you deserve better. Much love my friend. We are here for you.
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@Twizzlers hi! 
So happy to hear from you, youāve been missed. Scary experience for you, itās a lot of trauma both physical and emotional. Iām glad you have good care and the medication should you need it. Sounds like you are on the mend at last 
@tailee17 Iām sad to hear what youāve been experiencing. I agree, working on your sobriety and health will best position you to deal with any situation. Sober time makes things so frighteningly clear. Itās this siren blaring, practically. I remember overlooking so muchā just dissociating so I could somehow tolerate the intolerable. I hope your knee eases up and definitely donāt feel badly if some obscure task doesnāt get done! You definitely are enough and do enough.
I had a good happy hour social. I need to go to as many neighborhood things as possible. They had a neighbor who played guitar and sang, and different people kept going up to sing different songs. This is real neighborhood kind of stuff. Iām not used to it and itās nice. Apparently this started during the pandemic, people singing randomly in someoneās backyard 
Glad I went. Iām not overly social but I do like a bit. Good snacks and toted in some Waterloo fruit punch. No one noticed it or cared. Because I didnāt stay too long! I left after about 2 hours when I saw people getting big bottles of wine out. It was shifting gears, you know? It was all chill thenā¦.you know it was on! And I was out. No cravings and I feel encouraged that I can survive these things! I will skip most evening events as I donāt want to be in the booziest settings too often.
Sweet sober sleep see you Saturday
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Iād love to check in and quote my days sober but Iāve relapsed sorry after 3 months + 
not doing so good
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Youāre here and thatās all that matters right now. We can do 24 together starting now. Glad youāre here please donāt waste energy on feeling ashamed. Welcome back
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Ty @ lighter
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152
So something I havenāt mentioned here. Itās kind of disgusting, buuuut here goes.
Today I cleaned my jeep. Like fully detailed. (I used to details back in my Colorado dayz) with that being said, Iām pretty ocd and clean about my vehicles. This was the first time Iāve ever let her get and stay this dirty. She stayed dirty because it was a solid reminder of what I looked/lived like while drinking and using the drugs I did before I got sober. I hated getting in there! I felt disgusting. I was disgusting! It really put a hard spotlight on my situation after becoming sober. So I kept it that way. Almost 5 months now. I wasnāt going looking to impress anyone. I was getting my life together. So before Iād let anyone get close to my life by going anywhere with me again, I was making sure I had some stability under my belt. But now she be clean and it felt good driving today. Iām a civilian again lmao
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Day 1084 AF
Day 4 caffeine free
Busy day at work. Got paid today. Went out for groceries and bought fried chicken for the fam. Took the little man to the playground after work. Just got done watching The Amazing Digital Circus with my eldest. Gonna take my antidepressants and pass out. Gotta wake up early and do laundry before starting my Saturday shift.
I hope everyoneās doing well. Take care. ODAAT
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@Butterflymoonwoman I feel nothing but awe at how you have changed your life! 
@DamianUK I struggled at the 3/4 month mark and relapsed at least twice then, so I can relate. Just get back on the sober train. Persistence will get you where you want to be eventually.
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@FoxMcCloud welcome back, sorry about your break-up 
good that youāre back on track now though 
@spgand28 Iām so sorry for your losses 
but welcome back
@Mira_D sorry about the anxiety good luck with your job applications 
@JazzyS thank you I hope your neck feels better š©µ
@jbaldwin84 congrats on 150+ days
@Raspberry sorry about the anxiety my brain does the catastrophizing thing too 
I am also trying to learn self-compassion. I just wanted you to know youāre not alone š©µ
@Finn congrats on your week+ for no nicotine 
@Cynthia1 congrats on triple digits 
@SoberWalker bless you, I do love the colour š©· heal well š©µ
@Timbuk I hope your cat will be okay 
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@Mindofsobermike sorry for the sad sending strength š©µ
@Thirdmonkey congrats on 8 months caffeine-free
@DanaM56 pleased to hear it, enjoy your weekend away
@JennyH congrats on 2 weeks sorry youāre struggling though I hope the scan goes well š©µ
@acromouse so pretty 
I hope you enjoyed the cabaret
@Tragicfarinelli proud of you š©µ and I hope that headache leaves you alone asap
@Laner congrats on 6 months so glad you have supportive friends š©µ
@Collins congrats on 4 years 
@Whereswaldo congrats on 200 days good luck for selling enjoy camping 
@Noshame congrats on 3 weeks
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@Climbin sending strength š©µ
@DamianUK welcome back keep trying š©µ
1516 days no alcohol.
981 days no cocaine.
11 days no binge-eating.
0.5 days no vape.
Wednesday I did a lot of meditations, and watched 2.5 episodes of Brassic without binge-eating.
Thursday I also did a lot of meditations and watched 4.5 episodes of Brassic, finishing the season. No binge-eating.
I donāt really ever have much energy, but for some reason Iāve had even less this week. Yesterday I did the 7+hrs round trip to therapy and back, so that was a challenge! I am still in a lot of pain from walking over 10K steps yesterday, this is why Iām not sleeping right now.
I had my ADHD follow-up appointment Thursday evening. The psychiatrist said I do have inattentive and hyperactive symptoms, but that he wants me to be reassessed when I have completed my therapy, as due to so much trauma in my life, some of the symptoms may overlap with other conditions. He also said that due to the amount and high doses of medications Iām on, it wouldnāt be safe to prescribe me anything else, so in the meantime he wants me to be under the care of a psychiatrist to review and monitor my medication and mental health. So, this part of my story is on hold.
Yesterday I travelled and attended my Friday therapy in-person for the first time this time around. The journeys there and back were awful. Itās an airport train so it is always rammed with no spare seats and I was in agony the whole time as Iād already been standing for 30mins waiting to get on, both ways. The walks from the station to the hospital and back were not too bad aside from the pain. I arrived 1 hour early but that gave me chance to decompress from the stressful journey, even though he said I seemed very tense. It was much better in-person though, I still went mute a lot, and he still didnāt say very much, but I felt more able to express myself than I have been through a screen. So Iāll continue going there for it.
Wishing you all wonderful sober weekends.
š©µ
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174
Bored and feeling uninspired lately, donāt want to work tomorrow. Have been going for a run every day as a little game with myself to see how many days in a row i can get, and to help increase my endurance and overall fitness. Today is day 21 and Iāve been loving it so far. Hopefully I didnt overdo it today since i increased the time and intensity, i feel okay though just sore. Fingers crossed. Hope everyone is doing well.
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Late night check in. Just finished tidying the kitchen and doing the dishes. Big day. Worked all day, did the daycare drop off and pick up, went for a walk and picked up some flowers for my wife, cooked dinner, took my little girl to the park, got her down to bed, and carved out a bit of time to read. As a 40-year-old, I have a perseverance to get through resistance thatās way beyond what I had in my 20s and mid 30s. Up to a couple of years ago, after dinner I wouldāve been deep into the beers, had a game on the TV, and scrolled through social media. Not anymore. I go to bed sober, with a tidy house, meal plan sorted, and more shit together.
Going to bed with a book at the moment.
See you tomorrow.
Better late than never. 
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@Laner Congrats on 6 months!!! 
That would be me. I know I benefit from adderall. It worked for me up until I started taking more. I got up to 140mg a day, and by that point I had full blown psychosis. Iād like to believe I could take only the recommended dose, but I donāt trust myself bc Iām just as much an addict as I am alcoholic. Thereās so many here with prescription medication addictions, yet so many others with no issue using them responsibly in recovery. Sobriety definitely varies from person to person, and thatās okay 
@jbaldwin84 I bet youāre loving it every time you get in your car! 
I totally understand why youād keep it that way. Whatever it takes to keep you from drinking. I hadnāt cleaned my car in over 4 years(and hated having passengers), but one day I just went ham for 4 hours straight. Got into every nook and cranny. She deserved it. But more so, I deserved it. Sometimes the little things are all it takes 
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Busy day. Ran around doing errands all morning and just barely made it home for the bus. I didnāt even have a chance to eat lunch so I had 2 protein shakes at work. Definitely didnāt keep me full and I felt drained. Not a bad day overall tho. Just glad to be going to bed soon 
Take care everyone
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Day 469. Worked yesterday and then was on my course. Feeling tired but good. Course again todayā¦ So just a one day weekend 
I am going to immerse myself into learning and see how it goes.
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I have ADHD and I find many UK services for me are none existent Iām 40 years old
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