*Day 2221
It always kind of hits me in the face when someone dies from addiction. This morning Iāve read that Liam Payne (one direction) has died under the influence. Itās sad.
It reminds me of the destroying power of addiction. It can kill me
It can kill you
Nothing else to add to it beside I do not drink today
I can do this, you can do this. If one thing doesnāt work, try another! Never give up! Thereās always a way!
Tried being here every day?
Tried the 100 days challenge?
Tried AA? (ore NA)
Tried rehab?
Seeing your doctor?
Keep trying, keep going! You only need one final āclickā!
@SoberWalker so sad. He was born not far from where I wasā¦I remember watching them as kids on X factor. Just shocked and sad. Such a handsome young man with a young son and a future. I hate when I hear things like this as it really does hit home. Peace to his family
Im grateful to be waking up without a hangover and the shakes!
Went to a meeting last night at the local hospitals in patient facility for drug and alcohol treatment. It feels good to be able to be there for those who need it. I appreciated it when someone was there when I was in their places.
Looking forward to see what the day has in store. MAKE it an awesome day my friends!!!
Enjoying the week off from main work. Getting things done, relaxing for little bits of time.
Yesterday serviced mow machines and am off to mow a couple clients today, quite possibly for last time of the year, though weather forecast is for much more warm weather over the next week or so, so ya never know, may still be anotherā¦ Iām hopeful not, but Iāll do what needs doing as Iāve promised them all.
Mowed my own lawn yesterday (first mow with those sharp blades), and even though mid Oct itās going to need a couple more I suspect before I put equipment away. Itās so freaking green and full right now!
A shot from office window while having coffee this morning.
another day of sobriety by the grace of God and this program of action.
for the belief (not āself beliefā) thatās it ok to lean into and be proud to be a member of this fellowship. To tell the voice in my life to fuck off when it starts to try and ruin a good thing.
for home group last night and the honour of taking up a service position.
for being asked by my 12 yr old daughter, to help her with her cricket bowling before her match last night.
that I mowed the grass last weekend so I donāt have to this weekend and green bin is stuffed full ready for curb on Sun. night.
for last nightās meeting having some real āmeatā of knowledge given over in the shares for me to feast on.
for the thoughtfullness and act of love shown to me by another member last night (and by their partner) by way of a birthday gift.
Checking in. Ive missed a couple days. I feel like im just going through the motions this week. Im doing everything i need to do, but i feel numb and checked out.
Iām here, Iām sober, Iām grateful
I dreamt last night that a friend told me I should just have one glass of wine. I gave in and simultaneously thought that I will have to discuss that here, since I want to be honest about things. It felt really bad that I gave in and I was really disappointed by myself. Then I woke up. Such a relief - it was all just a dream!
Hit the road again and staying the night at a small national park with the place to myself. Nature is nice. Itās started raining though and will tomorrow too according to the weather forecast, so will probably postpone some plans by a day. The next stretch is supposed to be quite scenic!
Iām grateful for my current mental clarity. Weāre worth and meant for so much more than addictions and fear. We were born to give our best to be our best, odaat friendsā¦ The truth will set us free.
Day 337. All is going ok, tried going for a ride yesterday, it was windy and chilly and i had a slight headache so i just went home cleaned and cooked me and heather some dinner. Ive been noticing some sad sperts here and there, ive also been noticing ive been objectifying girls alot more in mind. Specially at work if i see girls walk by. Idk i dont like it really bc im in the relationship with heather. I like her alot, we have such a good relationship. So i dont like that yeah i think about sexual desires with other girls sometimesā¦ idk much love everyone
Im here and sober.
I havenāt heard from my older kids dad since before the hurricane. Him and i arenāt close, but i donāt wish bad things for him. So i hope hes ok.
My day off. Im sure ill be busy. Hope yall are doing well
@MrMoustache I know this will pass. Iāll just take it easy and sleep more if needed.
@Timbuk Iāve seen drinking dreams too lately. Though I didnāt drink in any of them. Either I was tempted and knew I should not drink or was irritated by drunk people around me. But I also woke up happy knowing they were only a dream.
196 days sober
Today was one of those frustrating days filled with a lot of reduntant, impossible and anger inducing bureaucratic mumbo-jumbo.
Basically I need document A but to get document A I first need document B. But in order to get document B I first need to get document A. Itās a viscous cycle of impossible documentation. I finally gave up and called in reinforcement. Solution - give a bottle of vodka to the director of the office that needs to give document B and after some enthusiastic hand shaking enjoy the fruits of my labor when finally I can get document A.
This stuff would have stressed me out before and made me think āI deserve a drink when I get homeā but not today. I went home and enjoyed a pot of hot tea while staring joyfully at my document. I donāt like having to give into bribes but sometimes itās the only way to get anything done.
Gorgeous day! Iāve been out working in the yard (finally) and my bare legs got cold! Iāve been in shorts since April. 48f/9c this morning. Now perfect. I can finally breathe fresh air. Summer canā¦kick rocks Love this
Cooking soon. Tie some things up and get ready for my little job in Santa Fe next week. Life is too good to ruin with alcohol.
Good morning im here seem like there are stages of heart attack. And im just like getting clean or sober. So i wonder where im at ? Ho knows im going fishing lol seems to be the voice of reason here fishie here ā¦ fishie fishie
Love this