Just about to go to sleep. Even though itās quite late (2am in Tasmania ) a few things are on my mind so Iām not really tired, but that should change with some asmr or relaxing videoā¦ Got a few plans for tomorrow which Iām looking forward to, and might start work at a cherry farm soon for a few months or so to top up a little money again before continuing travelling. It might also be with company for the next leg. Hopefully the work routine will suit a morning meditation and workout! Iām committed to fixing my life and becoming someone to be proud of. Odaat. Have as good a day or night as you can whoever and wherever you are right now friend!
Iām really glad to hear that youāre in a safe place and took steps to get the help you need. It has been encouraging to me to see how open and honest you are on here. Your vulnerability pushes me to be more open. I hope you get the help you need and heal.
The dog is waking me up at 3/4 am lately, super active at that time, and wants to go to the yard and then after a few minutes wants to come back inside and then at 7 am wants to go for a walk. Omg he is driving me and my girlfriend crazy with this new attitude.
His nails make so much noise when touch the bedroom floor that wakes us everytime he passes by, any advide for this? Btw I can not cut them more.
Other than that I have been chillin about life and everything. Almost all issues are on pause as I am priotitizing sleep (my dog is opposing to this) , rest and calmness. Taking it easy as Bob Marley teach us.
I am really enjoying keeping things simple and without attachment.
Thanks everybody for the support! Have a nice day.
285 days sober
I didnāt sleep well last night so felt a bit low on energy today. Felt like it took me a while to get going but I got there in the end. I made good progress on translation but got stuck on a section. I sorta enjoy when I get stuckā¦thatās when I can do some practical work and I end up running around to neighbors and shops to have discussion on possible translations and which dialect is best. It always leads to interesting conversations and breaks up my usual days. Todays discussion was how to best translate the word for āparanoidā a word which doesnāt exist in this particular language. The ideas given were helpful and some highly amusing. in the end a group of older ladies told me a story about a rabbit who always looked over their shoulder and because of this would fall into rabbit holes and they recommended I need to tell this story to get a proper idea of the concept of paranoid.
It was helpful and I have a good place to start tomorrow.
@JazzyS I donāt think they are translated to english, the names would not tell anything for most people here. I am very random with what I read, good book is a good book no matter what genre.
@MrMoustache glad to hear you are safe. Take care of yourself.
@JennyH happy to hear things are going well with your pregnancy.
@Seb thank you for the update. Such a scary thing to go trough. Glad to hear you can continue living your life normally.
@Laner I love reading your updates. Your life is so different than mine. And thank you for posting those stunning views you have there.
Walked about 14 km with my dog in two parts. Did some snow work. The day has went fast even i havenāt been doing anything else special. I feel very tired in the mornings even though i sleep well. I have begun to like evening time more. When i go to bed i stay awake few hours before falling in to sleep. Itās ok because i actually enjoy feeling calm and relaxed laying in my bed after the day without racing thoughts. My mood has been calm and steady but iām still working on negative thoughts.
What are your guyās view of separating Porn use as itās own addiction and Masturbation to Orgasm as another?
Like keeping track of your use of each of them separately. I have them on separate day trackers for now.
I ask because i eventually get to the point where i can stay away from porn, but i keep coming back to masturbation to orgasm.
Hi Laura! Thanks for asking! Wellā¦ I went there by foot in a rush right after work, cause we lack parking spots in town, and it was closed! There was a sign on the door saying that āfor personal reasons all appointments were cancelledā. So yeahā¦ it wasnāt uncomfortable at all, cause I look exactly the same!
I wish I had the discipline to move my workouts to the morning, but besides that, I guess that if I did my punch bag workout at 4:00am right over my neighbors bedroom, he wouldnāt be too amused!
Never tried it! Hmmmmmā¦ I need to find a way to do deadhangs with my āfeatherā weight somewhere in my home, without breaking anything! Might me a tricky one!
Quick early evening check in at day 12.
Just devoured a poke bowl and went straight to bed, I am sooo tiredā¦ Still have to get out to walk the dog though. I have two long days of work ahead so hopefully Iāll get some proper sleep tonight. Have a good one yāall!
lol, thanks and Iām unsure of the motivation. It all just began since I sobered up. But getting up at 4 to do cardio is much harder than getting up at 4 to enjoy my coffee. lol. I got push to make that happen.
And now that Iāve got my cardio in this morning, I gotta push to hit an hour of weights tonight.
I just am not giving my brain an opt to argue, when itās time to get up and do, I go. When I walk in door home, I get dressed and hit gym.
Just donāt give yourself time to come up with excuses.
Hahaha, true true. Choose wisely. My wife is two floors above me sound asleep when Iām hitting the morning workout. And nearest neighbor is about 400m away.
Checking in after a long day of work. It went pretty well. Normally the first thing I do coming home is walk over to the fridgeā¦ so now the first thing I do is take a hot shower. After that make some diner and a glass of water/soda. Still looking for something I like to drink, but I usually only drink water, coffee or wine. Now I want something with taste, but lots of sodaās I really hate. So got some crystal clear which is okay.
Itās bizarre to me that these small things are so ābigā the first period of being sober.
Going to watch a serie now and going to bed early.
Checking in day 15. Not feeling great today think I might be coming down with something. All good on the drinking front though, I really feel like I am done this time. I know Iāve said that before so maybe need to take with a pinch of salt, but still. Eventually you stop and itās the last time. I canāt think of any good reason to ever drink again. Been reading a lot of quit lit & listening to podcasts which I think helps too. Alcohol can fuck off. Also noticing more and more people speaking about having issues with alcohol. Itās so prevalent. Was speaking to someone the other day wanting to be able to control their intake and moderate, and I was just thinking āgood luck it never worksā (obviously didnāt say that to them!). Which I know is rich as I literally just tried to moderate the last time I relapsed LOL. But at least I know now, for sure, that it never works! No where left to run, no where left to hide. Happy sober Tuesday!
Good evening from a psych ward! This day has been okay especially towards the end. I met a doctor and we had a good chat. Theyāre monitoring me one day at a time, so I donāt know yet when Iām going home. But Iām glad that Iām safe in here. Iāve been mostly reading books and just chilling. I still have very dark thoughts and Iām sad and full of fear, but I try to remind myself that itās only my monkey mind talking. I have a tendency to catastrophy thinking, thinking that Iām doomed, I donāt have a future, everythingās gonna fall apart and so on. Itās part of the depression. But overall Iām grateful that I came here because being at home aloneā¦ Who knows what couldā ve happen. But all good right now.
Peace and love, my dear sober fam! Donāt ever forget how frigginā awesome you all are!
) a few things are on my mind so Iām not really tired, but that should change with some asmr or relaxing videoā¦ Got a few plans for tomorrow which Iām looking forward to, and might start work at a cherry farm soon for a few months or so to top up a little money again before continuing travelling. It might also be with company for the next leg. Hopefully the work routine will suit a morning meditation and workout! Iām committed to fixing my life and becoming someone to be proud of. Odaat. Have as good a day or night as you can whoever and wherever you are right now friend! 
