Daily Reflections & Daily Readings

[MandiH]

September 19~Daily Reflections

ACCEPTANCE

We admitted we couldn’t lick alcohol with our own remaining resources, and so we accepted the further fact that dependence upon a Higher Power (if only our A.A. group) could do this hitherto impossible job. The moment we were able to accept these facts fully, our release from the alcohol compulsion had begun.
AS BILL SEES IT, p. 109

Freedom came to me only with my acceptance that I could turn my will and my life over to the care of my Higher Power, whom I call God. Serenity seeped into the chaos of my life when I accepted that what I was going through was life, and that God would help me through my difficulties – and much more, as well. Since then He has helped me through all of my difficulties! When I accept situations as they are, not as I wish them to be, then I can begin to grow and have serenity and peace of mind.

From the book Daily Reflections.
Copyright © 1990 by Alcoholics Anonymous World Services, Inc. All rights reserved.

[MandiH]

September 19~Language of Letting Go

Apologies

Sometimes, we act in a manner with which we are less than comfortable. That’s human. That’s why we have the words: “I’m sorry.” They heal and bridge the gap. But we don’t have to say “I’m sorry” if we didn’t do anything wrong. A sense of shame can keep us apologizing for everything we do, every word we say, for being alive and being who we are.

We don’t have to apologize for taking care of ourselves, dealing with feelings, setting boundaries, having fun, or getting healthy.

We never have to change our course, if it is in our best interest, but sometimes a general apology acknowledges other feelings and can be useful when the issues of a circumstance or relationship are not clear. We might say: “I’m sorry for the fuss we had. I’m sorry if what I needed to do to take care of myself hurt you; it was not intended that way.”

Once we make an apology, we don’t have to keep repeating it. If someone wants to keep on extricating an apology from us for the same incident, that is the person’s issue, and we don’t have to get hooked.

We can learn to take our apologies seriously and not hand them out when they’re not valid. When we feel good about ourselves, we know when it’s time to say we’re sorry and when it’s not.

Today, I will try to be clear and healthy in my apologies, taking responsibility for my actions and nobody else’s. God, help me figure out what I need to apologize for and what is not my responsibility.

[MandiH]

September 19~Keep It Simple

When we look back, we realize that the things which came to us when we put ourselves in God’s hands
were better than anything we could have planned.—Alcoholics Anonymous

We can’t control the present by looking into the future. We can only look back at the past. The past can teach us how to get more out of the present. But the past is to be learned from, not to be judged.

As we look back, we see the troubles caused by addiction. But we also see recovery. We see how our
lives are better. We see ourHigher Power’s work in our lives. If we honestly look at our past, we learn.

Prayer for the Day: Higher Power, help me learn from the past.

With Your help, I’ll stop judging my past, just as I wouldn’t judge those who have gone before me.

Action for the Day: Today, I’ll remember my life before I got sober.

Do I still hang on to attitudes or behaviors that might make me start to use alcohol and other drugs again?

[tailee17]

This is so good. Bookmarking for sure.

[MandiH]

Agreed! Thanks for responding to it so I had a reminder to read it again today!

[MandiH]

September 20~Daily Reflections

H.P. AS GUIDE

See to it that your relationship with Him is right, and great events will come to pass for you and countless others. This is the Great Fact for us.
ALCOHOLICS ANONYMOUS, p. 164

Having a right relationship with God seemed to be an impossible order. My chaotic past had left me filled with guilt and remorse and I wondered how this “God business” could work. A.A. told me that I must turn my will and my life over to the care of God, as I understand Him. With nowhere else to turn, I went down on my knees and cried, “God, I can’t do this. Please help me!” It was when I admitted my powerlessness that a glimmer of light began to touch my soul, and then a willingness emerged to let God control my life. With Him as my guide, great events began to happen, and I found the beginning of sobriety.

From the book Daily Reflections.
Copyright © 1990 by Alcoholics Anonymous World Services, Inc. All rights reserved.

[MandiH]

September 20~Language Of Letting Go

Spontaneity

In recovery, we’re learning to let ourselves go! We’re learning to be spontaneous.

Spontaneity may frighten some of us. We may be afraid of the loss of control involved with spontaneity. We may still be operating under the codependent rules that prohibit spontaneity: be good; be right; be perfect; be strong; don’t have fun; and always be in control.

We may associate spontaneity with acting out in an addictive, compulsive, self-destructive, or irresponsible manner.

That’s not what we’re talking about in recovery. Positive spontaneity involves freely expressing who we are—in a way that is fun, healthy, doesn’t hurt us, and doesn’t infringe on the rights of others.

We learn to be spontaneous and free as we grow in self-awareness and self-esteem. Spontaneity emerges as our confidence and trust in ourselves increase, and we become more secure in our ability to maintain healthy boundaries.

Being spontaneous is connected to our ability to play and to achieve intimacy. For all those desirable acts, we need to be able to let go of our need to control ourselves and others, and fully and freely enter into the present moment.

Let go of your tight rein on yourself. So what if you make a mistake? So what if you’re wrong? Relish your imperfections. Let yourself be a little needy, a little vulnerable. Take a risk!

We can be spontaneous without hurting ourselves, or others. In fact, everyone will benefit by our spontaneity.

Today, I will throw out the rule book and enjoy being who I am. I will have some fun with the gift of life, myself, and others.

[MandiH]

September 20~NA Just For Today

Courage To Change

“God, grant me the serenity to accept the things I cannot change, the courage to change the things I can, and the wisdom to know the difference.” ~Serenity Prayer

Recovery involves change, and change means doing things differently. The problem is, many of us resist
doing things differently; what we’re doing may not be working, but at least we’re familiar with it.

It takes courage to step out into the unknown. How do we find that courage?

We can look around ourselves at NA meetings. There, we see others who’ve found they needed to change what they were doing and who’ve done so successfully.

Not only does that help quiet our fear that change
(any change) spells disaster, it also gives us the benefit of their experience with what does work,
experience we can use in changing what doesn’t.

We can also look at our own recovery experience. Even if that experience, so far, has been limited to
stopping the use of drugs, still we have made many changes in our lives - changes for the good.

Whatever aspects of our lives we have applied the steps to, we have always found surrender better than denial, recovery superior to addiction.

Our own experience and the experience of others in NA tells us that “changing the things I can” is a big part of what recovery is all about.

The steps and the power to practice them give us the direction and courage we need to change. We have nothing to fear.

Just for today: I welcome change. With the help of my Higher Power, I will find the courage to change
the things I can.

[MandiH]

My own reflections on this NA reading today I’m being guided to share:

I’m not in NA, but I still check out their readings as they still apply for me.

Courage to change. I resist change. I like to stay in my comfort zone. But no growth comes there.

When I first got sober, all I did was put down the drink for the first 2 years. Nothing changed. Not until I finally asked my HP (that I really didn’t believe in or have a relationship with) for help because I realized I was the problem as all the issues in my life kept repeating, even sober.

The next morning my sponsors husband “randomly” reached out to me and asked me to attend AA meetings online-covid just hit.

I had seen him and his wife in the 3 or 4 AA meetings I attended for a girlfriend of mine when I first got sober. I didn’t think I needed the program. But I said out loud during those few meetings to my girlfriend that if I ever did the steps, it would be with that woman after listening to her talk those few meetings. I hadn’t talked to them since.

Yet almost 2 years later he had the impression to reach out to me right after that prayer. He then connected me to his wife-who was the person I said I’d do it with? I was finally ALL in and ready to get out of my own freaking way.

I look back and see how much my life has changed since I started working the steps. EVERYTHING changed for the better. Literally. My life hadn’t changed much in over 20 years and suddenly, everything was changing. Which can be scary too.

My HP is asking me again to start changing. I’m scared. I’m comfortable where I am. I sometimes doubt that I have what it takes to make big changes. But I heard it said this week to never doubt my HP because NOTHING is too big for God to do. So, if I’m meant to change, I will be provided for every step of the way. I just need to find the courage to take the actions I’m guided to take. One step at a time just by doing the next right thing.

The program reminds me that ANYTHING is possible with my HP. Seeing those who have gone before me helps me to find that same beauty in my life. They also provide me with the courage to keep changing-even when it’s scary. Those who inspire me most are those that continue to move forward over those who stay stagnant and I’m grateful for this reminder today.

[MandiH]

September 21~Daily Reflections

THE LAST PROMISE

We will suddenly realize that God is doing for us what we could not do for ourselves.
ALCOHOLICS ANONYMOUS, p. 84

The last Promise in the Big Book came true for me on the very first day of sobriety. God kept me sober that day, and on every other day I allowed Him to operate in my life. He gives me the strength, courage and guidance to meet my responsibilities in life so that I am then able to reach out and help others stay sober and grow. He manifests within me, making me a channel of His word, thought and deed. He works with my inner self, while I produce in the outer world, for He will not do for me what I can do for myself. I must be willing to do His work, so that He can function through me successfully.

From the book Daily Reflections.
Copyright © 1990 by Alcoholics Anonymous World Services, Inc. All rights reserved.

[MandiH]

September 21~Language Of Letting Go

Letting Go of Urgency

One thing at a time.

That’s all we have to do. Not two things at once, but one thing done in peace.

One task at a time. One feeling at a time. One day at a time. One problem at a time. One step at a time.

One pleasure at a time.

Relax. Let go of urgency. Begin calmly now. Take one thing at a time.

See how everything works out?

Today, I will peacefully approach one thing at a time. When in doubt, I will take first things first.

[MandiH]

September 21~Keep It Simple

Love doesn’t make the world go around. Love is what makes the ride worthwhile. —Franklin Jones

Before recovery, anger, self-pity, and sadness often filled our hearts.

The world went on. We came to hate the ride.

In recovery, love fills our hearts. We begin to love life.

Love is really caring about what happens to other
people. Love is what makes the ride worth it.

We find much love in our program. People really mater to us. We really matter to others. For many of us, we learn how to love in our meetings.

The program teaches love because the program is love.

Prayer for the Day: I pray that I’ll welcome love into my heart and others into my life. Love brings me
closer to my Higher Power.

Action for the Day: I’ll list all the people I love and why they matter to me.

[MandiH]

September 21~Each Day a New Beginning

Praise and an attitude of gratitude are unbeatable stimulators . . .we increase whatever we extol. --Sylvia Stitt Edwards

What outlook are we carrying forth into the day ahead? Are we feeling fearful about the circumstances confronting us? Do we dread a planned meeting? Are we worried about the welfare of a friend or lover?

Whatever our present outlook, its power over the outcome of our day is profound. Our attitude in regard to any situation attracting our attention influences the outcome. Sometimes to our favor, often to our disfavor if our attitude is negative.

Thankfulness toward life guarantees the rewards we desire, the rewards we seek too often from an
ungrateful stance. The feeling of gratitude is foreign to many of us.

We came to this program feeling worthless, sometimes rejected, frequently depressed. It seemed life had heaped problems in our laps, and so it had.

The more we lamented what life “gave us,” the more reasons we were given to lament. We got just what we expected. We still get just what we expect.

The difference is that the program has offered us the key to higher expectations.

Gratitude for the good in our lives increases the good.

I have the personal power to influence my day; I will make it a good one.

[MandiH]

September 22~Daily Reflections

A “LIMITLESS LODE”

Like a gaunt prospector, belt drawn in over the last ounce of food, our pick struck gold. Joy at our release from a lifetime of frustration knew no bounds. Father feels he has struck something better than gold. For a time he may try to hug the new treasure to himself. He may not see at once that he has barely scratched a limitless lode which will pay dividends only if he mines it for the rest of his life and insists on giving away the entire product.
ALCOHOLICS ANONYMOUS, pp. 128-29

When I talk with a newcomer to A.A., my past looks me straight in the face. I see the pain in those hopeful eyes, I extend my hand, and then the miracle happens: I become healed. My problems vanish as I reach out to this trembling soul.

From the book Daily Reflections.
Copyright © 1990 by Alcoholics Anonymous World Services, Inc. All rights reserved.

[MandiH]

September 22~Language Of Letting Go

Trusting Ourselves

Many of us believed that heeding the words of God or our Higher Power meant following rigid rules, an instruction booklet for life.

Many of us now believe differently. The rigid rules, the endless instructions, the exhortation to perfection, are not the words our Higher Power whispers.

The words of God are often those still, small words we call intuition or instinct, leading and guiding us forward.

We are free to be who we are, to listen to and trust ourselves. We are free to listen to the gentle, loving words of a Higher Power, words whispered to and through each of us.

Today, help me, God, to let go of shame-based rigid rules. I will choose the freedom of loving, listening, and trusting.

[MandiH]

September 22~Walk In Dry Places

Making tough decisions

Decision Making

An AA member in a supervisor’s position was faced with the need to terminate an unsatisfactory
employee. Procrastinating about this unpleasant matter, she found herself wishing that the employee
would suddenly find another job, thus making the termination ordeal unnecessary.

But further reflection showed that the procrastination was related to the same problems that had dogged her in her drinking years.

She was a people pleaser; she felt guilty about inflicting pain on others.

She was finally able to make the tough decision and call the employee in for termination. In the process,
she discovered that a brief prayer time for preparation and a gentle manner removed some of the pain for her and the employee being terminated.

She learned that the principles of the program could help her become more decisive without being brutal.

I’ll look over any tough decisions I’ve been putting off and determination why I’m behaving that way.

Am I prolonging tough decisions just as I did when drinking?

[MandiH]

September 23~Daily Reflections

“I WAS AN EXCEPTION”

He [Bill W.] said to me, gently and simply, “Do you think that you are one of us?”
ALCOHOLICS ANONYMOUS, p. 413 (Third Edition)

During my drinking life I was convinced I was an exception. I thought I was beyond petty requirements and had the right to be excused. I never realized that the dark counterbalance of my attitude was the constant feeling that I did not “belong.” At first, in A.A., I identified with others only as an alcoholic. What a wonderful awakening for me it has been to realize that, if human beings were doing the best they could, then so was I! All of the pains, confusions and joys they feel are not exceptional, but part of my life, just as much as anybody’s.

From the book Daily Reflections.
Copyright © 1990 by Alcoholics Anonymous World Services, Inc. All rights reserved.

[MandiH]

September 23~Language Of Letting Go

Tolerance

Practice tolerance.

Tolerate our quirks, our feelings, our reactions, our peculiarities, our humanness. Tolerate our ups and downs, our resistance to change, our struggling and sometimes awkward nature.

Tolerate our fears, our mistakes, our natural tendency to duck from problems and pain. Tolerate our hesitancy to get close, expose ourselves, be vulnerable.

Tolerate our need to occasionally feel superior, to sometimes feel ashamed, and to occasionally share love as an equal. Tolerate the way we progress—a few steps forward, and a couple back.

Tolerate our instinctive desire to control and how we reluctantly learn to practice detachment. Tolerate the way we say we want love, and then sometimes push others away. Tolerate our tendency to get obsessive, forget to trust God, and occasionally get stuck.

Some things we do not tolerate. Do not tolerate abusive or destructive behaviors toward others or ourselves.

Practice healthy, loving tolerance of ourselves, said one man. When we do, we’ll learn tolerance for others. Then, take it one step further. Learn that all the humanness we’re tolerating is what makes ourselves and others beautiful.

Today, I will be tolerant of myself. From that, I will learn appropriate tolerance of others.

[MandiH]

September 23~Walk In Dry Places

When resentment Returns

Inventory

It’s surprising and even humiliating to find an old resentment flaring up, sometimes years after we
thought it had been put to rest.

When that happens, we wonder how thorough we really were in releasing the resentment in the first place.

The secret of handling this problem is to turn the old resentment over to our Higher Power without
wasting time wondering why it came up again.

We need to deal with it as if it were a brand-new problem; and in a sense, it is.

As for questioning our past sincerity, that too is a waste of time.

We are always trying to do our best with the understanding we have for each day. Being too hard on us does not make it easier to practice our program.

Resentments can and do return, but they don’t have to destroy us.

I’ll realize today that I’m always susceptible to any of my ongoing problems, including resentment.

Fortunately, I have my program for dealing with them when they occur.

[MandiH]

September 24~Daily Reflections

VIGILANCE

We have seen the truth demonstrated again and again: “Once an alcoholic, always an alcoholic.” Commencing to drink after a period of sobriety, we are in a short time as bad as ever. If we are planning to stop drinking, there must be no reservation of any kind, nor any lurking notion that someday we will be immune to alcohol.
ALCOHOLICS ANONYMOUS, p. 33

Today I am an alcoholic. Tomorrow will be no different. My alcoholism lives within me now and forever. I must never forget what I am. Alcohol will surely kill me if I fail to recognize and acknowledge my disease on a daily basis. I am not playing a game in which a loss is a temporary setback. I am dealing with my disease, for which there is no cure, only daily acceptance and vigilance.

From the book Daily Reflections.
Copyright © 1990 by Alcoholics Anonymous World Services, Inc. All rights reserved.