This is day 1. Alcohol has been ruining my life for a while so I have made the choice to stop. I have hid it from my family and friends so they have no idea how bad it is. Im scared I will fail. Again. Any help for advice is appreciated. Thank you.
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Right now I need to know what to do when i have the urge to take a swig from the tequila bottle? This is my first battle. Drinking (as of recently) straight tequila has become a habit at first to handle social anxiety and now its a full on habit. I am ok when there is no alcohol in the house, but my husband sometimes stocks the bar as we have friends by here and there. I cannot walk by the bar without taking a sip. Even if it’s first thing in the morning. A few weeks ago I made it 10 days. But once that bottle came in it was over. Just tonight I was about to down a healthy amount but I joined this group instead. How do you get past the urges???
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Maybe its time to empty the bar and change some behaviors. Have you spoken to your husband about this?
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I am too embarrased to admit the extent of what I am doing, so I have not, and I just can’t bring myself to do that yet.
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Its a great day for day one. Welcome to an amazing supportive community! This place and regular aa meetings have helped me beat cravings and the impulse to drink. I now have a little over a year after 20 years of problem drinking. We can recover but it takes work.
Id suggest you get honest with your partner because you will need the support. I bet he knows more than you think he does. But we are as sick as our secrets.
Congrats on taking the first step!
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Welcome to TS. And it’s community.
There are plenty of resources you can find here. And you can find them listed in the categories or searching using the magnifying glass.
I had to get rid of any alcohol in my house and even gave away wine glasses. As the others have already said it might be time to be honest with your partner (and yourself) about this pink elephant in the room.
What else have you tried? There are different programs (AA, NA, recovery dharma, smart, we are the luckiest) in person, online, podcasts, books, taking up a hobby which doesn’t involve alcohol, walking in nature. Have you seen an addiction counselor?
I fact once we accept that we have a problem and we can’t do it alone, is getting a lot easier.
What really helped me also was playing the tape through. What would happen if I’d have this glass of xyz? How would I feel tomorrow morning? Is it worth it? The answer has to be NO.
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This is truly amazing. If only my best friend would make the same decision. She’s also an alcoholic.
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Jamie from TX, welcome. You already took a huge step towards sobriety by coming here instead of drinking. The advice you need is all here, some already posted in this thread. I’m excited for you.
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Welcome to Talking Sober! 2023 update!
Welcome to the group. I know getting sober is can be scary but I promise it’s very much worth it. For me the best part of being sober is never having to lie to anyone, including myself.
You may find the link above useful as you learn to navigate the site and your sobriety. Best wishes to you 
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You need to tell your hubs your can’t have that bar stocked. We all had to avoid our DOC in the beginning before we found firm footing in sobriety.
You get through the urges by learning and understanding and fully accepting that drinking does not help you. Whatever you drink at/is the reason you drink for: alcohol will not help you with that reason. It doesn’t alleviate fear. It doesn’t soften hard life situations. It doesn’t XYZ. Not really. It impersonates aid, but that’s an illusion you are buying into and clinging onto with continuing to drink.
Be clear with yourself that alcohol does not help you with your problems.
Exchange the behaviour: pick two or three resources, a group a book a podcast, and give them an honest go. Mix and match until you find what works for you.
Resources for our recovery
Learn from those that walked the walk before you:
Your #1 tip for sobriety (over 2 years sober)
Stay accountable:
Checking in daily to maintain focus #54
Best of luck.
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Hi there and a warm welcome for you! 
It isn’t easy to come out your closet and tell someone you have a problem with alcohol.
You need courage to do so so my compliments you did just that up here.
I still remember when I opened up here and typed my first message here on this forum.
But I needed help and I got it.
An addiction florish by secrets so opening up is part of your recovery. You can’t do it all alone, you need your partner in it too. He can’t do it for you, but you need the support.
More people here mentioned it: that bar has to go ore being locked. At least in the beginning of your sobriaty.
When I was in the beginning of mine I removed all the alcohol out of my sight so it could not trigger me.
I avoided every alcohol related event, people and places for the first 3 monts of my recovery. So no festival, pub, wedding, dinner with friends, etc. That has helped me a lot and that’s why it helps to get your partner in it as well.
Every ones recovery is different, but there are a lot of similarities as well.
That’s why I like being here. Everyone up here knows where we are going trough.
I know where you are going through and it’s difficult right now I know!
But you can do it! I did too, sober for many years now. It’s possible!
But you need to get out of your closet.
Ps I’m Claudia, see you around! 
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I hope you get through it, I will pray for you Jamie.
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Just checking in- how are you doing? Lots of good advice and resources already provided. I too believe you need to be honest with your husband and also clear out the booze. Have you been able to talk with him yet?
I do hope thar you are taking the steps to help you recover and leave this addiction. This community is one of my main life lines - hopefully we will see you around.
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