First, thank you all for this great community. Although I’m new here, reading your posts have helped me already a lot.
Alcohol have completely ruined my life. I lost my job, mental health, my wife left me and I can’t see my kids as often as I’d like to. I’ve been drinking heavily for over 20 years although I was 5 years sober before I relapsed again. Now it’s my day 1 and this time I’m not gonna give up. I’m craving booze, weed and pills, the reality just seems too overwhelming. But I have no other choice than to stay sober because I wanna feel joy again, I wanna enjoy of my life. Right now I’m anxious, in panic, full of guilt and shame, but I know it will get better.
I’m also bipolar and borderline, so that adds some troubles into my muddy waters. Right now life seems hopeless, I can’t see the light, but I know I’m not alone with these feelings.
Welcome to the site @MrMoustache
As you can see, there are many here on a similar journey as yours. I hope you will find inspiration from them and I know you will find support one moment at a time you can do this. I’m glad that you are here and I look forward to you going forward.
Thank you! How has your bipolarity affect in your addictions? Mine has gotten worse every time I have drank, smoke weed or pop pills, my depression, fear, anxiety and panic attack just gets worse.
There are many many useful resources in the threads. Being accountable daily is also very helpful to many people. It gives you somewhere to be and to show up to get support and caring whether you made it through the day before or not. The accountability is important plus there’s a good bit of community and sociability.
The Daily Checking in to help maintain focus.
Yeah, I know what you mean by crashing hard. I’ve been drinking to escape my manic and twisted thoughts although I’ve know that everytime I drink, my moods are getting worse and worse. It’s a dead end.
Welcome! I’m sorry to hear all you’ve been through, you’re going through a trying, tough time. The early days are hard, but your mind and body will improve as you get more sober days under your wings.
Im early days too, you’re not alone. Keep checking in to keep yourself accountable. Best of luck with your journey, we are right here with you
Warm welcome @MrMoustache, I can relate to most of you’ve come through. Dear fellows of the community here helped me a lot, so you’re at the right place. What helped me is to have a plan (mental, training, breathing, meditation, food, you name it - basically a plan to create and maintain new habits) , keep daily journaling and reading posts here, and be kind of humble and realistic as our addicted brain has unfortunately creative ways how to “convince” one to ‘have a just one drink’. Keep determined, mindful and wish you a brave attitude.
Hello and welcome. Fellow bipolor here as well. I feel ya! Wow you had a 5 year stretch… If you can do it once you can certainly do it again. Keep up the good work so you can be happy and sober.
I’m sorry to hear all you’ve been through, you’re going through a trying, tough time. The early days are hard, but your mind and body will improve as you get more sober days under your wings.