šŸ—‘ļøEmpty Spam

Regret, shame, control, guilt, sorrow, hate, greed, manipulation, lashing out, angry words, hateful speak, superiority, attention-seeking, self centered, narcissism.

10 Likes

you would be surprised, Iā€™ve woke up with resentment bc of work and thatā€™s going straight in the binā€¦ Gone, just like that. :slightly_smiling_face:

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Can I throw allergies in the bin? Crusty eyes when waking up is yucky, and leads to resentment toward myself for getting this apartment while still drunk. Itā€™s so close to my old favorite bars, which is why I took it.

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Jealousy towards people who are able bodied, feeling worthless because I am disabled now after working since I was a kid. Anger because Iā€™ve done all I could to fix it including 14 hour open spine surgery almost 3 years ago and Iā€™m still disabled. Totally pissed off that I had to fight from 2016 to 2019 to get SSI Disability benefits because some halfassed Dr who never saw me before and knew nothing of my medical history said I could still work! Sad, because I used to love walking in the woods and in the beach and I canā€™t do that anymore. Adjustment Disorder (a psychiatrist said I have this since I had to stop working) I guess Iā€™m still not doing well with adjusting to this life. Resentment because my spine issues are genetic and not from an accident. I had 3 sisters and I was the lucky one to win this prize and walk like Quasimodo! I guess thatā€™s all for now
Thanks for spam toss!:purple_heart::purple_heart::purple_heart:

7 Likes

Fear, fear, fear, a little regret, OK here we go, Iā€™ve been on here and not posted my sober days I was going to post 7 days tonight, Iā€™m on day 7 now but went to work really happy then midday get told the virus is in our care home and had been there for 3 days, Iā€™ve never seen mass panic and tears before, Iā€™ve seen some shit in my time but nothing like the sudden feeling death.
I canā€™t post 7 days bc Iā€™ve been in that environment 10 hours, Iā€™m going to have a drink and smoke before bed, beds at nine so it will just be a couple, mentally done in. Day 1 again tommorow but come on my Higher Power, why keep fucking throwing shit at me, Iā€™m only human some days.

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Frustration, fear, economic insecurity, anxiety, and all things Paw Patrol.

8 Likes

These are some tough times for you Paul. I canā€™t imagine working on the front lines. Pls keep taking all those precautions and try to stay safe. I know itā€™s out of your hands at this point. Sending you much love. :heart:

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Iā€™m throwing anxiety in the bin today. I held onto it all day while working and itā€™s time to let it go. Also, fear is going in. It seems to keep coming back even after I threw it in the fire.

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Tossing in tension.

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More fear fear fear

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Fear, shame, depression, and lonelinessā€¦:v: out!

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itā€™s just crazy at work very scary environment, at the moment the only escape was to drink, Iā€™m OK with words but I canā€™t find any to describe how I feel. Iā€™m sure things always turn out for the best but itā€™s hard for a lot of people now not just me, this is the bit that bothers me others can remain sober, I thought I was real strong not too long back but when it comes to the crunch I just go back to type. I read on here someone told me I should decide if Iā€™m a drinker or a non drinker my reply to that is, itā€™s not a simple as that, Iā€™m an alcoholic.My head isnā€™t telling me its over I will keep trying.

5 Likes

Empty Spam: fear, anxiety, loneliness, nervousness

1 Like

thank you and defo no judgement, I love you all and youā€™ve all motivated me and inspired me at different ways at different times but there is a reason Iā€™ll keep coming back and there is a reason I will never give upā€¦ @Bomdhil this person shows such determination that it would be an insult not to follow suit.

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Never give up, never surrender!!

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Adrenal fatigue, conflict, stress, miscommunication, disruptions, interruptions, unfairness, impatience, frustration.

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Couldnā€™t have said it better myself

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self pity, anger, fear, selfishness,.

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I am feeling really down today. Agitated, anxious, lacking patience with our grandson and myself. Have used my tools, and here I am. Also am on day 5 of Wellbutrin, so there is that as well. So I will toss in agitation and anxiety.

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oh we love having our grandson have a sleep over for about the first hour. Bless em. :joy:

1 Like