Girl you know it’s true! I’m usually a beast and get everything done in one day. But, my lovely illness decided to flair up while I was moving. Probably because of how physical it was. I’m pretty badass lol. So, I’ll lift anything. I give my little chicken wing arms a pep talk “little grasshoppers, it’s all in the mind, if you believe you can do it, you can” and then the little fellas lift up the heavy stuff and I don’t get crushed and die. Cool, right? 
However, the way shit’s been going lately, I don’t know why I anticipated a completely smooth move. It was a total fiasco. The movers fucked me over seriously bad, only moved half the shit they were supposed to. So, to move some furniture from the 24th floor to the 3rd floor, it took them 4 mother fucking hours!!! PLUS they charged me a travel fee. I’m sorry, but you advertise moves within 50 miles is included in the rate ($89/hr), they cheap for a reason girl. I’m pretty sure it’s not 50 miles from the 24th floor to the 3rd floor, but what do I know 
I’m just a dumb old lady, and then they tried mansplaining to me and I came close to losing my shit, but Beth doesn’t do that anymore.
As the move is going on, I’m getting sicker and sicker. They left me by my storage unit forever, I didn’t even know why I was there, I let them in and that should have been it. I was getting weaker and it was getting more difficult to walk, so I went back inside and asked Kai (head concierge) if he would do me a solid and lock up my unit when the fucktards were done with it. And of course he did because he is one of my favorite people on earth, love him to pieces 
So now, I’ve busted out my fancy bling cane because I’m a crippled gangsta. I go upstairs and I’m in shock by how much is left, but said fuck it, they are already charging me for 4 hours. Oh, and the first hour was because they couldn’t figure out where my building was and where to park. Funny, because I left VERY detailed instructions for them. Exactly where to park (right outside loading docs), mind you, this is their 3rd time here and the same guys. I told them to park there, go inside to the front desk, the concierge is expecting you. He will open up the loading doc doors and give you access to the freight elevator. I don’t think that’s rocket science? Maybe I’m wrong.
You know what’s funny, and no offense guys. I always give excellent directions to my place. I send a google earth pick of my block, the roads surrounding, and it’s notated with where everything is, where to park, where to enter my building. Women, never ever ever never have a hard time finding me. So far, ZERO men have been able to figure it out without calling me when they are outside (sorry guys). For some reason, our tiny little city makes people nervous. Including my parents. Um, HELLO we are from NY!!! I think uptown Charlotte is like one square mile, if that lol. I never thought NYC was big. I was like, what is everyone talking about, we are on a tiny little island (manhattan). Now, that I’ve been outside of NY, I can look back and say, oh yeah, yup, it sure is a big ass city lol. I miss it a little, and I’ve entertained going back for the right job, but I would have to get an apartment like super close to my job, because my ass ain’t walking far or scootering far in the cold. Y’all know how freaking cold it gets in the city? And why is it so damn windy in the winter and then the summer when you pray to the sweet baby jesus for even just a little breeze, nope, ugh!
Anyone from NY remember the grapes commercial. 
When it’s hot and humid, grapes will cool you down. Cool off, with grapes
So, anyway… I now had to try to get everything out by midnight, and there was no way I was doing that alone. Emily is pissed at me again, so she didn’t help. She literally thinks I need to go on disability and live in her guest room, and give away my dogs. Well, no offense kid, but that ain’t no life and I would much rather eat a bullet for breakfast. So, now that I won’t meet her demands, she’s ignoring me. She said I need to come to terms that I am just too sick and I’ll never be able to work again. Not happening, working is my identity. Not the coolest identity to have, but it’s who I am, and it’s how I feel good about myself.
So, Emily wasn’t helping. Ava, my sweet 17 year old, left from school when her classes were over (1.25 hours away), and was able to help for 2 hours before she had to go back to prepare for the marching band shit for an away football game. She got back here at like 1am. This is Friday, the day after I was supposed to be out. Thursday, after the movers, I tried to move some stuff. Sat down on the sofa and woke up at 11:30pm, 30 minutes to get everything out, ugh panic.
Now I’m feeling REALLY sick, funky AF, still can’t walk, dizzy, just funky. I take my little cart, head up the elevator, bring down a load. Go up again to get another load, and I started to feel like I was going to pass out, like crazy weird feeling, I lowered myself to the ground and laid down on my back. My hands were twitching badly and I was getting an electric current sensation running from my elbows and out through my finger tips. That’s the last thing I remember, I woke up 4 hours later 
Ugh, I tried to grab a few things, headed down to the new unit, took the dogs out, and then fell asleep again. Emily wasn’t responding to me, I tried calling multiple times and texting, but she ignored me. I later found out she was texting with Ava, so I don’t get it. She was headed out to a weekend at the beach with her boyfriend, so I guess it’s easier to ignore me than to say you can’t help, I don’t know.
This is where Ava came in, sorry it was out of order. I called Ava, and saw the time and immediately hung up because she was in school. I though I hung up quickly enough that it didn’t ring on her end, but no such luck. I didn’t want to disturb her at school because I knew she would fly out of there with rockets on her ass (what a difference from the alienation days, wow ) OK, so now back to her getting back to me around 1am after the game, and just exhausted… She made it until about 4:30am and I made her go downstairs to bed. We finally finished Saturday afternoon/early evening. I told her to just toss shit wherever you find room, just make sure there is a path to the dogs and the bathroom lol. Typically, I get a load, put everything away, and repeat. It’s a breeze. But, the 2 bedroom was huge, so a lot had to go into storage which is onsite. I did not think everything would fit, but I worked it out. Here’s pics of the old place all cleaned out (I’m going to miss that panoramic view!!!) and the new place, totally different view/feel, but I like it. I like having the tree line and I like the people watching, and I LOVE how much easier it is to take the dogs out. The elevator ride is a snap. PLUS, we can also use the stairs. The dogs hate the stairwell, but sometimes we don’t have a choice, I ain’t waiting 3 days for an elevator. The only thing that sucks is that you can’t use the stairs to get back up which is bullshit, but I guess it’s a security thing. I mean they are fob protected like the elevator buttons, so I dunno.
Love you girl, sorry for the novel lol
And the new place looking like an episode of hoarders 
The finished result, it’s small, but I still have a nice view. I just don’t feel as safe here. I’m much easier to snipe. Oh, and I can’t leave my sliders open all the time because I’m too close to the ground which means BUGS 
I love my toilet lady, she classy af
It’s hard to tell, but the closet is huge, that doggie condo is ginormous, it has a separator in the middle so the dogs don’t boink, but fuck if pervert Steve didn’t figure it out… more to come there. For reference, I fit in one side easily.
And… gotta go, but leaving a little teaser. This one is my favorite, and I’ll fill you in on the story later. Her name is Sabrina for my niece. Had a breakdown over her the other day
Congrats on going from nothing to a liveable space again B. Big hugs.
That video was wild.
