I’ve exercised, cold shower and walked a bit then started drawing. And I felt I am really crazy in a healthy way I sometimes fear that I will lose my crazy parts when I’m sober but that’s not true, it’s just that the unhealthy crazy (delusions, hallucinations, delirium, mentall illness) is replaced by good crazy: intense creative work in paintings, poetry, dance, etc., sudden explosions of ideas of all kinds in my head, in the form of concepts, mental images, feelings
and words. And an appreciation for art and the present moment, so intense I get spooked out by my own feelings. And sudden laughter and screaming and crying without a reason many times a day haha
The following image is what I’m drawing right now. It does capture how I feel a bit. Still hollow because I stell feel empty a bit from the drugs but it is starting to get better
l
