My drinking has gotten out of control. Every time I drink, I hate myself. I hate what I have said, who I talked to, question what I said. Arguments I get into. I’m just devastated in my life. I have an 8 year old boy who needs a sober mom. Today is my day one. I am hungover at work again. Please help… anything encouraging.
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Welcome. You have made the first step among what will be many more. That first step of admitting that you need help is the hardest. So congrats on that.
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Thank you very much. That’s means a lot believe it or not
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I wish, I had quit at 30! You can do this! It is a daily challenge, but this place is wonderful
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Hey- don’t beat yourself up about the past just know that your heading in the right direction and once your out your mind to staying sober the benefits are unbelievable! You can do this, don’t give up!
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I have done that multiple time after a hangover. This time just feels different. I’ll take your advice about informing a family friend. Thank you 
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I wish I never started drinking this heavily… I don’t even k ow how I got this bad. It’s scary
Pretty sure, most of us feel the same way. It just became a normal part of life for me…even when i tried to quit in the past, i would talk myself into drinking…and the cycle would start over
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Please try and take control for not only your sake but your sons as well. I have 4 grown up sons whom I treasure and get on with really well but I feel like I missed an awful lot of them growing up in their teenage years because of drinking. Life goes by too fast so treasure every moment of his precious little life and give him all the love he deserves with no selfishness. I wish I could turn back the clock to when mine were that age, I would do a lot of things differently. Good luck
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The biggest problem is I hide the worst of it from my family. A glass of wine went to a few coolers… and now when I have some coolers I feel.the need to take shots of hard liquor. Closet drinking is what some call it. I can drink a 26er of whisky in one night. I’m not proud of it
The few people i have told are completely shocked, i was very functional, and hid my drinking
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So you can relate to what I do. 
I told my mother about it once, but I told her I got better and stopped doing the shots. But it started again. I feel disgusting
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You are not disgusting! We are people with a problem…that is all…
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I’m also 30 and an alcoholic.
Sober since Sunday just gone. I went out Saturday night- text abusive messages, kicked out of bars, got in a fight.
Usual story the day after say I’m not drinking again. On day 5 now don’t want to get in the same cycle I always get in
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Been there, luckily with age, the fights went away.
Just turned 31 last weekend and ruined yet another birthday. Today is day 4 without drinking and I’ve been logging into this app every day. People here give good advice and are going through or have gone through the same thing. Keep coming back and when you dont drink today, that’s a success 
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Hey @MissyJ! You are taking a step in the right direction. I definitely can relate. I’m 29 and a mother of a sweet 2 year old boy. A large part of my motivation was to be truly present in his life. I also was a daily drinker. My days would be based off of whether it was a “two tequila” or “one tequila” day. Meaning if it was good - I would start out my night with one shot and a beer the second I got home from work. If it was bad - it would be two shots and a glass of wine. You are not disgusting!!! You have recognized a problem and are actively seeking help. Reaching out takes a lot of guys in itself. You are in the right place!
Here are some tips to get you through the first few days.
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I wish I had quit at 30!! How wonderful you are doing so!! Lots of info on here so read up and soak it in.Getting sober is pretty fucking great once you get past the initial shitty part.
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Congratulations on making the decision on getting sober,I was the same,my kids need me sober and I just hated myself.i found reading the Allen Carr book fantastic at the beginning,I’d read his smoking one and found him an awful idiot but something clicked with the drinking one.you can do this,I think you’ve already done the hardest part deciding to get sober,I’m now 113 days and feel a million times better,inside and out,good luck xx
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I am only on day 10 but we sound very similar. I hate the person I am wen I’m drinking. The things I say I would never dream of saying sober. I become selfish…self centered and at times , just plain cruel. The day I got sober was the same day my fiance of 4 years said he had enough . For me it was to late to fix or heal that relationship but I’m working on the personnel relationship with myself and that is always a good place to start . Don’t beat urself up and read this forum any chance u get. It has helped me stay focused and strong. U can do this …late is better than never 
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