I hear you. I know that feeling. It’s low, it’s blue, it feels like you’re nothing and going nowhere. It’s really rough 
You are doing something that is a big, big change, probably the most important thing you’ll do in your life. It is not an easy thing. It takes effort every day. But it is the best thing you can do, and it is worth it.
You need a support network. You need people you can call, a community you can reach out to when you’re feeling shitty or at risk.
You can build a community in one of the recovery fellowships - there are meetings happening all the time:
Online meeting resources
You can find one of the recovery programs here:
Resources for our recovery
And of course Talking Sober is like having a meeting in your pocket. There’s usually someone here.
Don’t stay alone love. I know you have your baby to care for, you have a job you work at, a home you maintain - you have responsibilities. You are capable & you’re a good person and a good mom. And like all of us, you need connection with people. Reach out and build your support network. It will help.
And don’t be afraid to be daring in building that support. There are a lot of things people are afraid to ask for (or don’t think to ask for), that if they did ask for, they’d get. For example: I need a meeting where I can bring my child (at many, you can, and many parents do). Or, I need a meeting in the morning before work (they exist). Always ask, always search, always believe you will find what you need. You will.
Take care love and remember: never give up on yourself. You are a good person who deserves a safe, sober life where she can be her full self, for herself and for the people she loves 