Hi I’m new to this, I’m finding it real hard to stay sober longer then a week, I mean I keep going back to it due to a custody battle with my ex over my son and also loosing both my grandparents within 10 weeks of each other this year. The longest iv gone is 15 days sober but then I start getting nightmares and then the next day I’m back on the alcohol. Iv never spoke about this to anyone and thought this is might be a good place to start… am I just a weak person or do I just need help?!
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You’re a brave person looking for help, nothing weak about that. I would suggest recovery meetings if you’re willing. This forum is a great resource with all kinds of great people. I wish you well, reach out anytime
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Welcome Dan! It’s a process, it was for me anyway…quit and fall off the wagon. It’s so ingrained in us that it’s like cutting off a limb. I actually went through mourning the loss of it.
BUT it can be done; think of how it feels to be fully present in any situation and clear headed!
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Hey, yeah iv had a really shit year tbh. I suffer from depression and severe anxiety so every time I go to take the first step to get help I run for the hills. It’s not that I don’t want the help because I do I just can’t bring myself to open up to anyone about how I feel or what I’m going tho. I was hoping that this was the first step of going though that process
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Welcome Dan. We all need help. And alone, we are all very weak against this battle. Surrendering and Building a support base is key.
Here are two good threads to start:
I hope to see you around.
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Thank you everyone that’s replying it’s giving me an idea of how I need to go forward. I’m so glad I joined this because I know I’m not alone
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Your definitely not weak, takes a lot of courage to reach out and be honest. Do you need help? No bc we have to help ourselves but what people here can offer you which is priceless is understanding and support. Life can be hard at times but that’s not why you drink, you drink bc your an alcoholic. Read lots on here and keep sharing your feelings and story. You are not alone.
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Hi, welcome @Miller21. You are most definitely not alone now. I’m glad you found this place. It’s my main support tool, my DOC was alcohol also. Welcome to the family. 
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Try
Try again
Try once more
Try differently
Try again tomorrow
Try and ask for help
Try find someone who has done it
Try to fix the problem
Keep trying until you succeed
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What makes u smile just do it dont think just go do your favourite thing
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Listen to the people in here they are brilliant they help so much . With making sense of things . Littlemiss chatterbox is very cool and helpful
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Getting off the starting block on the way to sobriety is the hardest for me… I suggest getting some help is the best like reading messages on this site as well as professional help… but one my mind has cleared a little the focus becomes stronger but the inner battle has only begun but it’s a bloody start! We all got to start somewhere like learning to walk… I wish everyone the best, I have only just started my sobriety again, day 20… my its been a struggle again but will pursue… I know I am a better person sober…
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Hey good to see you here, your not a weak person for not making it out of the woods yet we all cant do it on our own need help and encouragement along the way. Like a child learning to walk if we dont know what to do dont have balance we’ll fall just look at it as if we’re birds can cluck with the turkeys or soar like an eagle. Took me 25 years to finally realize i needed to get help. Good first step coming here your with like minded folks, your not alone.
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Change your mindset from “I can’t do this” to “I can do this” and BELIEVE you can, because you can! You really can. You’ve got this. With courage and determination, and a flat out refusal to go back to that of which you want no more of, drinking. It’s time to change your whole outlook on life and who you are. You can now choose to be a non-drinker. You won’t drink because you don’t drink. You don’t even want to. You embrace and love sober life and you can see alll the positives being sober is bringing to your life. Sober life = your best life. At times, when you think about drinking alcohol, and your mind starts to glamorize it and make you think you’re “missing out”, you notice those thoughts for what they really are… BS! And your play the tape ALL the way through… you realise that you decided to quit drinking for a reason, because you hate what alcohol brings to your life, and you know you don’t want to be OR feel like that drunk person ever again! You see alcohol for what it really is: poison. You relish in the fact that you’re no longer a slave to it, and that you know how to have real and long-lasting joy, peace and happiness sober. You take things one day at time, live in the present moment and don’t worry too much about the future. You say NO to the drink that matters…the first drink! Then there won’t be a second or third or so on. You tell yourself NO when you need to. You have plans in place for those times where you don’t feel so strong. Go to’s. Seek out support from the people around you, who will support who lovingly and whole-heartedly 
find a community of sober ppl who can help you and relate to you and you to them. Come on here and read read read, a lot!! Reach out on here when you need to. When you want something bad enough, and you profess it and decide it, the universe will conspire to deliver it to you, through your own actions and choices. All the best, friend. You got this!
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Good for you for reaching out. It’s the first step in getting resources to help you stay sober. You’ve already admitted you’re powerless over alcohol, so you’ve already started working your 12 steps! That’s awesome!
Addiction makes us live in a world of “fight or flight” all the time. It’s exhausting. Our brain leads us to believe that alcohol helps calm this, and therefore we get caught in the net of addiction. It’s a chronic illness, just like with diabetics who have pancreases that are fooled into not releasing insulin, or heart failure patients whose hearts are not working right. Like anyone else who is ill, we need help to manage our disease.
Everyone’s addiction journey is different, but at the end of the day we all share the same disease. Lean on others who have found management solutions to help you fight. I like 12-step meetings, and my Big Book and Buddhism recovery texts are great tools - and this forum is a good, safe place as well.
I wish you luck and support in your journey, and just remember to take it moment by moment, day by day.
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Thank you all for your support, I have read them am I feel at home here. It’s a start and I’m already on day 1 and 2 hours sober. It’s not much but it’s a start for someone that just wants to have that taste you know…? So grateful for your responses❤️
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I’m on day 400 and at the moment I’m itching so bad specially being on vacation and seeing everyone enjoy them selves and playing games and my bf going to the bar without me. I’m extremely moody bc of it and irritable. But I’m going to hang onto this bc I know at least for me the outcome will be worst and the feeling of regret will way heavy on me more so than the feeling of wanting to use plus letting my kids down snd family just isn’t worth it. Stay strong!
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Just keep focused mate you can do it
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