Im reaching out for the last time

I am suffering through crippling anxiety and have for a long time. I started useing hard drugs to cope as a teenager and escalated to full blown addictions by the time i was 20. Through rehab and various other support systems i was able to kick all forms of heroin and anti depressants. But i could not stop taking cannibus. Now i want to quit smoking marijuana because it is ruining my motivation and will to be alive by requiring me to have my head changed to function. I dont know who to ask for help because no one thinks its an addiction. Im so afraid of my anxiety resurfacing and confining me to my bedroom again that i feel afraid to walk away. I dont know what to do.

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Please helpā€¦i am in a very bad place right now.

Glad you found this forum. Imo itā€™s very helpful. You might want to use the search function to find other threads specific to marijuana.

Regardless, taking the time to create a topic on here is a step on the right direction!

I think it can become an addiction. Iā€™ve never understood why some people dont see it that way.

Im addicted to living a normal life but marijuana is the catalyst allowing me to do so. I feel like the marijuana is living and there is nothing left of me. I feel like the world doesnt need me because i am useless without a drug to make me function.

Have u ever tried to quit it before? Hate youā€™re feeling hopeless. I think @ByeCannabis probably has insights to share. Iā€™ll try to link up some threads 4 you.

Yes ive tried. I was hospitilized for a week the last attempt for irradic behavior and suicide watch. I want to try again but i am scared

Hang in there.
Dont stop seeking help, things change, you change.
And if anybody thinks weed isnā€™t addictive they are wrong
Deep breaths

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Iā€™m no doctor, but if u experience clinical mental health issues like anxiety, depression, etc., then i could see where stopping your ā€œmedicineā€ mightā€™ve landed u in the hospital before.

Whatā€™s your fear, or do u even know? Sometimes when I have anxiety Iā€™m not able to identify the trigger. It sucks!

Itā€™s definitely possible for u to stop smoking.

Hereā€™s a link from Anyone quitting weed?:

Im scared without the drug ill go back to laying in a dark room afraid to go outside. Afraid to speak with people. Im afraid without the drug i am not a real person.

I understand exactly where you are coming from. I have severe anxiety and panic attacks. Been points where I couldnā€™t leave the house at all. Fear of leaving and fear of everything. Have you seemed any medical or therapy for this? I know it is paralyzing and is terrifying. There are some vitamins and over counter things, that may help. If you didnā€™t want to be taking any medications for it. I am always looking for new & alternative ways to help. I have done the weed thing for anxiety in the past. You can definitely overcome this. I have good and bad days as far as leaving. But, it can be managed.

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Anxiety about anxiety is like being in a hamster wheel for me. Let today be your day 1. Youā€™re still a real person without the drug. Test it out.

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It is comforting to know im not alone and someone understands that im not imagining this. I have been in and out of therapy since i was 12 years old. I stopped when it became about what drug we can try next. I want to stop ALL the drugs.

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Well I too wanted to stop my psychotropic meds. Was off them, after medically tapering, for several weeks. I wanted to know my baserline. Guess what? I need medication. For me, thereā€™s no shame in it. Iā€™m back on a very conservative regimen. I go to therapy. I actively do self care stuff. I need the meds, just like a cardiac patient needs medsā€¦ and no, thatā€™s not an excuse/justification for taking them. My brain chemistry is out of whack to point of interfering with my life, if Iā€™m not treated with meds. No shame here about it. None.

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You have accomplished much, kicking the ā€œhard drugsā€, and I can see the desire to be totally free from all mind-altering substances, and how it can be a huge psychological challenge.

I would highly recommend that you listen to this podcast (episode 116, the latest): http://jockopodcast.com/

Rob Jones is a US Marine who stepped on a buried IED in Afghanistan, which resulted in his losing both his legs, above the knee.

Rob Jones is a US Marine veteran, who just completed a self-imposed challenge of RUNNING 31 Marathons, in 31 Days!

Let that sink in for a minute. Marine lost both his legs in combat, above the knee, and didnā€™t just run a marathon (something few even attempt), he ran 31 marathons, over 31 consecutive days. How?

Listen to the podcast, as he tells the story of how goals, determination, and an unbeatable will to win, carries him through everything life throws at himā€¦blew me away!

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Hey ( @SweetTea thanks for tag) . The first thing I have to say is that there is absolutely nothing wrong with being on psychiatric medication. Without my antidepressant I am a different person. I tried many over the course of 10 years and it was frustrating until I found the right one. It changed me significantly for the better. So although you hate the idea of ā€˜finding the right oneā€™ - unfortunately that is the reality for many. I have seen psychiatric medication literally save peopleā€™s lives. I am qualified in this area so if you want to message me more about specific medications I can give you detailed advice (and some personal experience but bare in mind it is different for everyone).

Marajuana is a temporary fix for some temporary feelings but it makes you worse in the long run. This is why I decided to quit and I am so glad that you have too. Yes, anxiety can be managed in other ways, exercise, breathing, distraction, occupation etc. But it can also be really helped by some medication (preferably an antidepressant rather than something short term like a benzo, which CAN sometimes be associated with addiction issues).

Youll get through this. Youā€™ve already taken the hardest step by being here. :slight_smile:

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I completely understand. I am in the same boat Iā€™ve been an addict for over 11 years and suffer from PTSD and anxiety and depression. I used herion for years then switched over to alcohol and I have always weed. Iā€™ve been sober from everything except weed for 106 days. I canā€™t seem to give it up. It really does help my anxiety. I would love to give up and have a complete sober life. Itā€™s not easy thatā€™s for sure but what helps me is this group itā€™s great to talk to people that are going threw the same thing because my friends and family try to help but they just donā€™t understand. Also I do have a therapist that I see once a week who helps me cope with my anxiety that got me started smoking and using drugs in the first place. Distraction is the best thing for me when I get a craving. I binge on Netflix or read a book and now I like doing puzzles lol which I never used to enjoy but it keeps my mind focused on one thing and takes my mind off of using. A lot of people like going to the gym itā€™s a great healthy way to let out some steam. Just take it day by day thatā€™s all you can do and like I said it definitely helps coming on here just letting your feelings out and sharing your story because it helps so many people that are going threw the same thing!

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Oh my word.
Stay Strong!
I hate that people are treating you like that.
Weed use before the age of 17 years old increase your rick of killing yourself because of anxiety/depression that normally comes from long time uses.
I am glad you came here for help, weed was never really my thing, I help someone here can help you more then I can.

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You are not alone in this feeling, I am sure a lot of us felt this way before, I know I have.

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