Right end of day 5 wtf did I make it to day 5 only gods knows I think pun intended 
I had to deal with every emotion there is to day changing all the time did some meditation around ovetthinking and understanding my emotions BC that’s where I struggled I’ve used since the age of 12 I’m 40 in May Nd my emotions have been covered up bk taken mind altering chemicals so no wonder I don’t know my ass from my elbow, but when all is said and done I fighting for a better life like I have been for my kids n me for many many years I will carry onto to fight until it starts to feel natural. Night all. 
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OK so I’m hitting day 6 feeling better on n off emotionally its a MF but tbe, going on a walk with a friend as literally spent last 6 days in bed. Xx here’s to a beautiful Sunday.
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Glad your feeling stronger today emma. Keep it up your almost there, then you dont ever have to feel like shit or wake up sick af ever again. Glad to see your still hanging in there. Keep it up!
Thank and thanks for your support it means alot. X happy Sunday. X
Anytime, and you too. Proud of you for making it this far. Your in the home stretch. Dont give up!
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Ah doug I haven’t got many rslses left I know that o20 years oh herion n pills booze etc at some point something has to giv, I decided to walk away willingly. Xx
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Glad to hear, i fucked with opiates for 12 years, took me wayy too long to walk away as well, but cant change the past or the future. Can only change today.
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OK here’s 2 end of day 6 
shit the bed I’m so fucking angry, I’ve been written down the honest answers jotting bits down on paper alday try to make some sense of it all, I’m just had a bath got jacket spuds on I’m sat in bed with a flask of tea and a coffee n walnut cake MINI TREAT, I’m due on so that alone emotionally kicks my ass so all said n done not to bad, easy does it I’m always living life at 1000,000 mph have dome since a child so been meditating alot around understanding emotion anger etc. Here’s to another evening of netflix. Thanks for the support. Xx
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Here’s to day 7 still alive starting to feel alittle more relaxed but still depression is kicking my ass and I’ve spent so much time alone in my room but tbf the first 4 days brushing my teeth n washing was a choir, I have social sevices involved atm BC my 17 went into school and expressed her concern I was slipping which I was, I’m she’s already seen me seen kids, and is now in process of talking to schools and drug worker then the case I hope should be shut down n we can move on do phone councelling 1st a week and tbh I did na for a year and I’m not sure if I’m ready to do that again or find a different route time will tell.bace a blessed ean n sober Monday. X
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Wow I couldnt imagine going through all that. Really inspiring I wish the best for you. Sounds like such a struggle but you are doing amazing🤗
That’s the tip of the iceberg of a 20 year addiction. Somehow someway I made it thru by the grace of someone or thing watching over me prisons overdoses prostitution. Homelessness, I’ve lived in hell and he a sly. Fucker as he beckons me bk but each time I get n stay clean out of all the detoxes rehabs prisons, etc I learn.but there has to come a time where enough is enough. I’m tired
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Its time for you to be free of that hell.
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I have been stuck in bed a lot lately because of depression an anxiety. It is a lot better than it was but its hard to not just want to sleep all the time. I want to go outside today and go for a walk. But i dont know if i will. The sun does seem to heal. I like looking at the birds too.
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Ahh do t think it do it I’m the same, but I promises you the birds and the air will help ten fold, just get up dressed don’t think and just do, yeah I’m crawling away from hell on my hands n knees atm silentetly just incase I’m beckoned bk and I havent got the power to say no so I’m staying under the radar, its OK to be sad n stay in bed but just don’t stay there too long… Call the best to you let me know how your walk went… Xx and what birds your saw.
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That’s amazi.ng good on you how did you feel after I’m off out today first day in about 4 days so can’t wait. Il try to get some pics
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It is warmer so that is nice. Still not the best but just a start.
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Keep going now don’t look bk. Xx I had a really hard afternoon my cravings nearly took over n tbh it was BC I was lonely and bored but, I need and want to get my life bk on track so today I beleive could be the start of that. X it’s 6.15 am in UK so up before kids for coffee n some time to settle my thoughts, I’m due on my period n that’s not helping me emotionally. X day 8 for me today. X so getting there slowly. Xx
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Periods screw me up too!!!
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