Maybe Just One Wouldn’t Hurt

I hear this all the time from my “friends” who drink. And by drink I mean like a fish needs water. It’s their lifeline. I still have beer in my fridge for my dad. I have no intention of drinking again, but what if I did? What stops anyone whom has a lot of time sober? Being alone is the hardest thing for me


I hear ya. I feel pretty lonely living with a husband who drinks . A lot. Every day. But I know that for me, “maybe one” ain’t gonna fly. Not anymore. I’ve seen too many times where that leads, and I ain’t gonna go there. Stay strong, friend! :heart::pray:


I’ve found it’s best not to live in the fantasy land of ‘What if?’ Live by the facts. We all know exactly what will happen if we pick up. It will turn out the same way every time. There’s no doubt in my mind.

Learning to sit with yourself definitely takes practice, but once I got there, I fully enjoy my own sober company. Remember who you were. That’s not someone I want to be around. Stay the course :muscle:


In those cases, when I’m surrounded by my DOC, I know there are two stories running through my mind:
One is a lie. That’s the one that keeps telling me how great it would be to use.
The other one is experience: This is the one that tells me how it went the last time, and every time I used.
The tricky part is knowing that the first one is a lie. That it will never be what it’s telling me. That it will be the same my experience is telling me. And I don’t want that experience in my life ever again.


First off for me “Just one” is not or ever possible for me. Mostly all the reminders of what I felt like drinking and the problems that came with it. I keep a list off reasons in my phone as reminders.


I think for me I had over two years alcohol free. Had the odd one then it just got worse. One is all we have to resist. As that’s the worse bugger of all for me to stop after


dosnt cross my mind have several bottles of wine for guest who visit and my wife might have a glass twice a year as for a lot of time sober if they have that time im sure drink wouldnt cross their mind . if it does then they are doing something wrong


In early sobriety I never told myself this lie, it was always should I get wasted again or not? I knew one drink wouldn’t make it, since I drank from when I got out of bed in the morning all thru the day into the night, and that was constant every day for about 17 years.
I laughed at some of the questions they had to determine if I had a problem drinking, like: “Did you ever try to have just one drink”? and I could honestly answer NO! “Did I ever try to stop drinking and couldn’t”? Why would I want to stop? Just give me MORE.

So they told me to think the drink through, and I could see in my history one was never enough. I would just fast forward to the end with the shakes, busted up cars and relationships, no money just scrounging around for anything with alcohol in it.

My experiences where I picked up coming out of my 1st and 2nd detoxes only confirmed what I knew inside: that when I start drinking I don’t stop. So this delusion never bothered me.


What stops me is the countless stories of people here, thinking that they can control it and have just one, only to return weeks, months, years later of uncontrollable relapse. I know I am no different and I’m not special, just one will cascade into full blown relapse in no time.

When I was actively drinking, I was desperate to be where I am today, ain’t no way I’m gonna risk that!

At first it was hard to make the change, but changing my relationship with alcohol helped eliminate the desire! Might work for you too!

Be well my friend!



The best part , for me , i know i don’t have to lie about if I’m drinking

The simple desire to REMAIN in control of my own freedom
I’m healthy

Excellent conversation starter


My wife drinks also
It’s so annoying but, hey we’re going on 29 plus years married
What stops me from drinking with her?
I have fun being sober.
What hurts? She says she can’t be drunk enough to have sex with me. She flirts. Man, sometimes i want to … but i don’t because then if she’s in trouble Who is going to protect her then
Sober me


Dude. Listen. I might be able to handle it. Just one drink. Maybe. After having been sober for over 3.5 years. I feel pretty confident that I’d be fine. But I more than likely would pick up right where I left off. And I’d be right back at the bottom in 3.5 seconds. And after I spend all my money on booze and I can’t pay my bills, I become homeless, my car gets repo’d, I have to give my dog away, I sell all my possessions to drink more, and finally flip my own off switch. Yeah, no. I might be able to handle just one. But probably not. And I’m not willing to take that risk. And I know it’s the same for you. I know it’s the same for every alcoholic. It’s not worth it, man. Leave it alone. It’s not for people like us.


This is easy for me. I don’t want one drink, I never have. I want ten. I can’t have ten and live a good life, so I just don’t have one. :ok_hand:


Dinosaurs would return to the earth before I have “just one”

If I have more than just one I return to the spiritual, physical, and mental torture I used to live in.

So I stick to aa and the thought of a drink is no longer tempting to me 99% of the time. Finally!!!


I have more then 5 years of sobertime, what stops me from drinking again?
The memories of my relapse before my day one.
The stretch of 5 years I let go because I convinced myself that I was “normal” again.
The 1 and a half year of struggeling to show myself and others I could moderate my alcohol intake. And to finally decide again that that struggle isn’t worth the few glasses of wine I allowed myself to have.

I love the calmness in my brain, no more discussions in my head about when I’m allowed to drink and how many. No more cravings (well I have them sometimes, but seldom).
I love my early mornings filled with “me” time: coffee, TS and reading the news without a hangover. Love putting my head on my pillow in the evening sober and knowing I can remember all the next day, etc.
And most important: I love the new me!
I’m learning and growing and work in progress :seedling:

And yes, “just one” would hurt all that. Because that would activate that voice that is sleeping inside me. I call her the Winewitch and she and I are no friends. She thinks she is, but she is a bunch of lies on a stick.
No more, ever.


My sponsor once told me he wouldn’t take a first drink for a million dollars. But if he did, he would give me a million dollars, his house, his wife, his children and his health for his second, third, fourth…


For me I try to ask myself what value does it add and if I ever really had a good time drinking. More often than not those reflections lead me to realize I’ve only ever been mean spirited and hurtful while drinking or completely irresponsible after drinking. So I refrain.


What stopped me in my early days was the realization that every reason I had to drink really wasn’t true, or good. It was an excuse. “I want to drink to celebrate”…sure drinking poision is a great thing to do to celebrate-not. “I am feeling stressed and it will take it away” Nope! The things I did while drinking caused MORE stress. “I want to drink and be social” True connections don’t need alcohol, that actually makes them worse. “I will just have one” NOPE!! I neeeever just had one-I drank to get a buzz.

For me, I asked myself what good would ONE drink do?!? Nothing…It just makes me want more.

Now I have surrendered fully, I know I am absolutely powerless over alcohol when I take the first drink. When I drink that first one, the drink takes me and I end up in places I don’t want to go. So, instead I do whatever it takes to end my day sober. Doing things completely differently has brought me to an entirely new life. I’m beyond grateful for that. This keeps me sober.

I could have my old life back. All I have to do is have just one drink and I’ll end up back there pretty much immediately. But this is a progressive and fatal affliction so I won’t be there long. One drink isn’t worth the cost of my life.


I recently had this experience at a birthday party where I saw all of my old friends. I quickly realized why I had moved 500 miles away. One guy bugged me all night to have a shot with him. “Just One” “Come on, for me!” “You can take one shot…”. My answer was always a rendition of “I can’t have one, I’m an alcoholic and my sobriety is more important”. Having one shot with the super drunk dude at the party would have meant the world to him then (probably wouldn’t even remember it in the morning) and to me, it would have been starting over and I’m just not willing to do that.

I really like being alone, I live in a very small community and enjoy time to myself but I did realize I couldn’t sit and do nothing with all this extra time and energy. I became a volunteer firefighter and have really enjoyed that it gives me the opportunity to interact with people and focus on something good. I’m not saying run out and bury yourself with extra stuff, but I’ve found volunteering immensely helpful in maintaining my sobriety. Lots of opportunities out there with shelters, non-profits, municipalities, etc. Check it out if you’re interested.


What is it that you want for yourself in life? Do you think all the people who say that dumb shit to you really care about your own best interests? They are as empty as a bottle of beer after you finish it…Nothing good…