New sobriety and relearning to live

Hollz · July 19, 2021, 1:53pm

Good morning everyone. My first day off in awhile so I’m planning on doing some reading and catching up and I couple really great meditation books that are interactive so I am thinking about throwing some time into those stay blessed all

Matt · July 19, 2021, 2:51pm

Sounds like a good plan - enjoy your day Hollz!

Hollz · July 19, 2021, 2:57pm

Thank you @Matt ima try to

Hollz · July 19, 2021, 5:08pm

just me today. Happy and healthy

Hollz · July 19, 2021, 5:14pm

My pittie baby Ace he is so calming and doesn’t care or judge if I need to cry

Matt · July 19, 2021, 5:48pm

Aww Ace is a beauty! Have you shared Ace here?

Post photos of your pets #3

Hollz · July 19, 2021, 6:17pm

I shared the pic of me and him in there

Debz · July 20, 2021, 1:11am

love you,
Mom

Hollz · July 20, 2021, 2:02am

I love you momma I hope you like it here, there’s so many amazing people

Hollz · July 20, 2021, 2:25am

So I went to the surgeon today they gave me a shot in my shoulder and want to do a different kind of MRI
I’m frustrated and irritated but I know I’m blessed and I’m trying to focus on that. On the fact that I’m able to even get seen by a doctor. That this isn’t my time as much as the control freak in me wants it to be, and I need to be patient. I need to let go and let God
emphasized text I am not in control of every single thing and that’s not a bad thing!!

Hollz · July 20, 2021, 3:01am

Hmmm I see so many people complaining and it kinda makes me feel guilty that they are saying they are so miserable yet I’m so happy and grateful. Healthy and more content and proud of myself then I ever have been
IS THERE SOMETHING WRONG WITH ME??

jonathanlee213 · July 20, 2021, 3:28am

The attitude of gratitude can get us a long way, nothing wrong with you. Im sure we’ve done nothing but complained about our misery when stuck in our addictions

Gotno · July 20, 2021, 5:01am

Nothing is wrong with you. For some people it just clicks. I think it has alot to do with if your really quitting for yourself.

My first attempts at sobriety werent really for myself if im being totally honest. I was doing it to please my wife and because I felt the responsibilty to be a better father.

My final quit was more about me. My wife and kids were motivation but I wanted it!

Gotno · July 20, 2021, 5:06am

The gratitude in this post is what is going to get you through.

We are lucky to live the lives we do. 7 billion people on this planet. We have a a roof over our head, food in our bellies, and access to some of the best healthcare in the world. Not many can say that.

siand · July 20, 2021, 5:23am

Some people have different baselines. Some people use the forum for different reasons and tend to check in more when they’re struggling. And we all have times when we feel better and worse. I know I have times when I am so stuck in my own head, gratitude doesn’t feel very available to me.

In early sobriety I was riding a pink cloud for a few months and EVERYTHING WAS AMAZING! Then life caught up with me a bit and I wasn’t really prepared to deal with it. But that was all part of my journey and I did deal with it. It might not work like that for you, it doesn’t for everyone, but it doesn’t hurt to be aware of it. Some good discussion of that here

Hollz · July 20, 2021, 4:31pm

Thanks for the feedback. And I quit along time ago and I was miserable but I was ordered by a court I had hurt someone in a fight and I didn’t want any part of being sober or for that matter I didn’t think that I needed to be sober… alcohol wasn’t the problem, I was… and that there was my mind set for a very long time. But I know how I feel and I’m strong lord knows I’m strong, but I’m happy and I have never stopped anything in my life that I didn’t finish and this will not be any different. I have bad days, I have days where I’m in pain I just don’t find negativity as a choice of how I deal with things because it doesn’t get me anywhere to be negative. Or it gets me sympathy which is even worse.

jonathanlee213 · July 20, 2021, 4:49pm

Have to loose some of the smaller battles to win the war.

Hollz · July 20, 2021, 4:56pm

You always speak truth and I always appreciate it

Hollz · July 20, 2021, 4:56pm

A mouse was placed at the top of a jar filled with grains. It was so happy to find so much food around him that no longer he felt the need to run around searching for food. Now he could happily live his life. After a few days of enjoying the grains, he reached the bottom of the jar.

Suddenly, he realize that he was trapped and he couldn’t get out. He now has to fully depend on someone to put grains in the jar for him to survive.
He now has no choice but to eat what he’s given. A slave to his situation.

A few lessons to learn from this:

Short term pleasures can lead to long-term traps.
If things come easy and you get comfortable, you are getting TRAPPED into dependency.
When you are not using your skills, you will lose more than your skills. You lose your CHOICES and FREEDOM.
Freedom does not come easy but can be lost quickly. NOTHING comes easily in life and if it comes easily, maybe it is not worth it…

Don’t curse your struggles, embrace them. They are your blessings in disguise.

Matt · July 20, 2021, 5:07pm

I love this Thanks Hollz!