Not doing too great. It’s 12 pm and I’m sobbing. Ifeel so alone and when I get this sad, I always want to cut, but I know I can’t. But it stinks. It too me like an hour to fall asleep yesterday cause I had either two or three flashbacks and stuff. Night is when I get way worse. And I’m a teenager, so my brain is supposed to want to stay up late, so it stinks. Yeah. Ah well.
That sounds like a plan! See how you get on, you will do whatever is right for you.
Super random but for acid reflux my bf swears by raw broccoli 🤷
Hang in there mate, sorry to hear it’s hard right now but you’re doing so well!
I can’t even eat raw broccoli. It’s so bitter. I use lemon juice in water, which actually helps.
Yeah. Been doing pretty ok.
Welp. I really need to stop trying with my parents. I need to stop hoping they’ll care. I know they won’t. NAnd I just need to accept that. It’s just hard. Ah well. It’s gonna take time, but I just really need to stop caring and not keep telling them stuff cause I know they won’t car and I’ll be hurt.
Agh that’s super frustrating. 
By the way I do still keep up with your thread, I care about your journey, and I like to read your updates, I just never feel like I know what to say, especially since I tend to criticize what I write a lot, and it feels easier to just be silent. Just thought you might like to know 
Lemon juice in water sounds nicer!
Sorry to hear your parents aren’t giving you the support you need. How did it go with your therapist on Wednesday?
I’d suggest not to stop trying with your parents, but to let go of the expectation that they’ll get it somehow, or that they’ll change more to how you fantasize them to be.
I’d 10000000% hope that my kids would tell me everything, even if I don’t fully understand, or know how to help. It at least will continue to give me some of an understanding, even if it’s minute, of what’s happening inside of them.
Yeah.
Thank you😊. It’s ok. I am the same on other people’s too. And even if you criticize it, I won’t, btw. And thanks for letting me know. I get it.
Lol it is. And it really helps.
I couldn’t tell her. And idk why. I think part of it is I don’t want anyone to know and I don’t want to think about it and I want it to go away. But I also just don’t want to have to talk about it.
And I think I do kind of feel like it’s my fault it happened and I’m kinda just ashamed of how I handled it and idk. I think it’s a combo of things, but idk if I can tell her.
Yeah, that’s what I mean. I mean stop trying to get them to care.
It’s not that they don’t understand. It’s that they don’t want to hear it. And they don’t want to change how they act. I get it. They’re old and tired all the time. I understand it, but it still hurts.
I just need to stop trying to tell them stuff cause it hurts me more than them not knowing.
I’m still gonna try to talk to them and whatever, but not sharing my feelings or stuff that bothers me or whatever.
Sorry this is so long. I’m crying rn and when I’m emotional I can’t write well.
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This is long and stupid and rambling. Beware!
Theres a certain things that I didn’t know bothered me until today and it wasn’t fun. And I felt nauseous after. It’s so frustrating.and I hate these memories. I’m not doing great.
I’m gonna try to email my therapist and I might just say hey, I can’t talk about this, but here’s what’s up.
I’m just crying so much like all the time guys. I hate myself for letting this stuff bother me.
And on top of that, my teacher every day says how stupid and illiterate we are and it’s a lot. And it’s just a lot to be hating myself while he’s hating on me(for no reason, might I add).
Every now and then I’ve been breaking down in tears. And wanting to cut and stuff again. But I haven’t, thank god.
I think that’s a great idea. At the end of the day trying not to think about it isn’t helping it go away. Try not to overthink it, just write what comes out. Maybe just copy and paste what you’ve written here as a starting point. It’s not your fault you’re feeling this way and you deserve support to deal with it.
How is your back by the way? And how’s it going with the PT?
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Yeah, I know. It’s just really really hard to talk about.
I’ll try. I just really don’t want to have to talk about it and it’s so stupid and tiny and I hate myself for it.
I’ll try though.
My back is actually better. It’s more off and on than constant now. Still can’t stand for too long or shovel for too long or anything, but hey.
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It’s not stupid or tiny. I obviously don’t know the details, but whatever it is, to make you feel like this… That means something and you deserve support to work through it. Just try, and do what you can. That’s all you can do and as much as anyone could ask of you 
Sorry, i missed what happened to your back. It just stood out to me, since thats what i specialize in treating. You should consider seeing a chiropractor for your back.
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It’s this guy who did stuff I didn’t want and I couldn’t even talk. So I always feel bad I didn’t just day no.
Yeah, that’s true. I always say to people if it matters to you, it matters. Gotta remember that. I will try. Thanks😊.
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I went to an orthopedist then a physiatrist. What’s the difference between those and a chiropractor?
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U less you have something for serious like a fracture or disc herniation, going the medical route has shown to not prove fruitful. Chiropractors treat soft tissue injuries. The vast majority of run of the mill back pain is from injuries that healed wrong and developed scar tissue which restricted movement, weakened the area, and irritated the nerves. Chiropractic works on relaxing and realigning the scar tissue to improve mobility, increase strength, decrease nerve entrapment, and decrease nerve sensitivity.
I’ve seen it time and time again, run of the mill back pain patient comes in. They’ve tried the medical model and its all failed, until they begin to work on the root issue.
Huh cool. No one really know what I have though. They think it’s a pulled muscle or something from overextension cause I’m apparently hypermobile? Idk. They’re trying to build up the muscles to protect my back.
Does a chiropractor do like massage? Or is it more like PT, like exercises?
Chiropractors adjust joints and soft tissues. The stretch that occurs within the joint soace creates a neurologic pain block and helps to break up scar tissue. This helps to increase strength and mobility of your joints