Please do Sweet❤️
Just got news that a job awaits as soon as im back. Before and after next surgery… He wants ME!!!
BIG UP IN MY PARTICIPATION ISSUES.
the fact I will be in revalidation Soon didnt matter.
Blessed
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That’s great news Joost! Congratulations! 
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Yay! That’s great news! I’m happy for you.
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Thnx and rising i am… But my head head is struck by An immens pool of emotion, greeve and rats of sunlight that glimmer thrue litteraly jours and jours of crying… the well seems endless. Even now i cry and then i know , and than i dont know why…
Nor good, nor bad… Im stick in a look imbo of tears that remind me of so much pain and i Just can’t stop it. I finaly AM crawling up out of depression but IT seems endless… I know it’s good that i cry, am not in harms way…
But the recognition of what’s inside is overwhelming… deeper then a universe
@Girlinterrupted @SoberWalker @mno @Lisa07 … Any wisdom?
No emergencie but Just the Gravity of it? Any feedback would be most welcome
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I go through periods of crying both good and bad. More so in the early days of sobriety but I still have them now just not as much. I think it’s normal but then again I’m no doctor so it could be depression. You’ve got a lot going on health wise which could be the cause. I find it helps when I post about it or talk about it.
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Its the recognition, acceptance and a shit load of greeve while really good things are starting… I Get scared of help and Fortune
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No wisdom here Joost, just a recognition and an acknowledgement of what you’re going through. You’ve been to hell and back and then some. And you numbed yourself with some hardcore dope. You got a lot to process. This is one way of processing it. It’s OK. Indeed keep talking and keep looking for and using support. Again, don’t go it alone.
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remove the E, E stands for ego and what are you left with, motions. Sometimes we just have to ride em, ups and downs and it feels like we’re going round and round but motions slow down and level out unless they get momentum so stop pushing against it and just go with the flow. We are not our Ego - motions we are just passing through.
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It started when my godmother called and started about my father… It had been years since spoke out that word… Father… Decades…
Then she showed me a childs printbook.
Getting help does not mean giving up… It means refusing to
What’s the thing you ever said wherefore you needed the most curage, asked the boy.
help said the horse
When were you at your strongest in LIFE asked the boy.
The moment that i got the heart to show my Wellness…
Guess for today that makes the circle round again
Will (c)(t)ry to get some zzzzz’s .
Thnx ya’ll 
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that’s the boy the mole the fox and the horse, lovely little book it is too 
everyone should have a copy.
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Ik heb t boek ook. Die van het vragen om help heb ik in de mental health memes gepost een jaar geleden. .Hug vriend. Goedenacht.
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Great book. I have it thanks to @Dolse71 . He’s right , everyone should have a copy. I hope it helps you
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Joost, you have a very heavy load of stress on you. Your health issues have been relentless, but you need to give yourself some credit. It has been so far from easy, but you never give up.
I don’t talk about it much on here, if ever that I can recall. My best friend had all four limbs amputated below the elbows/knees on November 1, 2017. It was due to medical malpractice. I remember dropping to my knees begging God to not take her as we didn’t know if she was going to make it.
It’s been a long 4 years. There have been many ups and downs. I often wonder how she manages. Before this (I’m getting a wee bit emotional talking about this) she worked her ass off at two jobs, not because she had to, but because she enjoyed it and loves being around people. Overnight her life changed.
I spent hours at the hospital everyday for months and months and then at the rehab. I was there when she walked on her legs for the first time and there when she refused (and still refuses) to wear her damn arms. Bitch can eat a single frito with her nubs though, she is something else!
Since I don’t have experience with what you’re going through personally, I’m going to lean on what my friend did and does. She has an incredible sense of humor. She truly cares for others and tends to try to be a friend and of service to those she loves. I tend to do it as well, it takes the focus off of your sadness for just a moment while feeling good that you were able to help someone else. Of course she has really bad days, but as time goes on, the good days punch the bad days in the face.
I watched her get through this and I know you can do it too. One day it’s going to be behind you and just a memory of something that made you stronger! You’re going to kick this in the ass like you always do xo.
Hang in there. Write here a lot. Get it all off your chest. We are going to be right there beside you dear friend. You’ve got this!!
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Hi Joost, for me I think crying is processing stuff.
And you have a lot to deal with not only on mental side but also with your body healing and surgery coming up…
There’s much going on!
And using messes up the serotonine and dopamine levels, maybe that has to settle as well?
I think it’s good to let it all out. Can you talk about your emotions and situations with others? I know you do it here, but have you friends ore family you can share your thoughts with?
I love your grandma, she seems like a wise lady Such a nice gift to get: that book.
She’s right: asking for help is courage!
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You are so wonderfull !!! Stay strong yourself and what An incredible thing to share with me. You lift my spirit and give me stenght… Love you my dear far friend !!
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Its my aunt, but my only kin that had not forgotten me. I love here to it is like the tip of A huge iceberg and i cannot fathom hoe deep it goes.
My aunt is verry wise indeed and she confronts me with a loving mirror of reflection…
Not many friends that i have the heart and braveness for to share my things with but i found some here . Like you .
Je bent een schat !!
Bless ya’ll
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I think I read too fast…overlooked godmother for grandmother 
But now I understand. I do not have an godmother, I’m not baptised.
Don’t you wanna talk about your emotions in real life with someone as well? Maybe when friends are not availeble a counselor ore something?
It can help things fall into places if you understand what I mean. Sometimes the mind keeps turning in circles and it’s hard to come out yourself.
Dank je en hou je taai Joost 
Je bent een goei! (In het echt Brabants: ge ben unne goei!)
Voeg een R toe en zie wat je doet:
groei
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Nee, al veel schema, psycho etc therapie achter de rug. Ben zelf hulpverlener en werkte in de verslavingszorg 
From the en vanuit een zonnetje 
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En dat zijn de slechtste clienten weten we zelf Joost Werkte zelf voorheen in de psychiatrie. We weten het zelf allemaal zo goed en dat is tevens onze grootste valkuil. Toch? 
Bedoel het niet lullig…
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