For sure, addiction is addiction just different vices. My sponsor broke it down for me which kind of blew mind… he said lusting and sex wasnt my problem but my solution to not wanting to be present to deal with life on life’s terms and accepting things I couldnt change. So, i would revert into self and do all of these things to numb and not need to feel feelings or emotions and so on. It was my form of self soothing because I didnt know any other way.
I have had many breaking points and rock bottoms but to hear my wife utter “I cant have you be my husband right now” was the tipping point for me.
Pshhh I have so so many triggers, I dont know where to begin. Along the way though I’ve also come to know myself better and what some of my character defects are.
Still fairly good. My oldest is 15 and has been a little detached lately and I think influenced a bit by her mom but I will still love her and will show consistency on my end. The more I do my program and get closer to my HP, the byproduct will be a better me for her. My youngest is pretty okay with it all
I’m from Yuma, Az but reside in Kansas now. No paying for help and advice as of yet. I’m in a 12 step program, have a sponsor, reach out to other fellows, have deleted all of my social media and am soon going to be doing therapy
All random but if you’re wanting to get a better grasp on pmo addiction, to me, the movie Thanks For Sharing captures it (disclaimer: may be triggering to pmo addicts). It stars Mark Ruffalo and Gwyneth Paltrow. I remember the first time watching it and it seeming so real to me. I felt seen and shameful at the same time knowing some of the extents this addiction had taken me to where my ethics, character and morals didn’t match and were pushed to the wayside. If you do check it out, I’d like to converese afterward at some point and get your perspectives on it.
That’s what’s up then… you get it. What’s your reasoning for no social media? We should pm sometime.
The area I’m in is small and rural and a bit out of my element but I have learned to tolerate it and just trying to be appreciative. I know God has me tthere for a reason so I’m still trying to seek out what that purpose is. It’s my wife/exes hometown and my girls have cousins there in their age range and same grades so they really enjoy that. Plus, with it being a smaller community and school system, they’re able to participate and be active in a lot of things. So I’d say those are some of the pros. Cons: an hour away from a Walmart in any direction, the same with good restaurants and amenities, miss being in diverse spaces to name a few
I just started my journey 2 days ago for the same reason. Not only addicted to porn but a serial cheater. What your sponsor said really hit hard for me. Seeing everyone here is such an inspiration and stay in recovery
Congrats, man it is one hell of a challenging journey but the transition is so worth it. I have had a few experiences with adultery too so I understand. It’s definitely not something I am proud of but it happened. I can only do better now to never become that person again. It was met with guilt, shame, resentments and anger towards myself. I felt worthless.
But yeah man this is a good community to be apart of especially in those early recovery stages and difficult times… I have a few whatsapp SA groups that I participate in. There’s also a link to join SA Zooms pretty much any hour of the day, all day. Feel free to pm me. I’m down to give you my contact info or anything to help you along the way. We all need support, I got you.
Goodmorning its 638am rn yes pm me , today is my day off / never actually get a day off when your a mother lol me and my fiance are going to watch the movie u suggested, my reason for no social media i was in a 18yr marriage, and my ex would torment me 4 having social medias, and connecting with people so it stuck. , i feel like they contribute to a lot of toxic ways with people any ways so it feels uniqie to not have what every one else has …
Since walmart is a hour away how often would u say u go ? Lol i bet where u live is beautiful , the scene that is. ,
Are you done having children,
I left my husband for raping my daughter while i worked ,
And for not getting sober with me ,
I could handle the ass beatings cuz durring my addiction i wanted a family of unity not realizing having a father / mother house hold could be just as damaging as not , i hated my self for a long time when i found out what he was doing to my daughter
Cool cool. I’m still in Arizona right now so I’m only an hour ahead of you. Being a mom is the most difficult and underrated job on the planet. I commend yall but wouldnt wanna be one, ya feel me lol. Bet lemme know what you think after yall watch it. Yes, social media is definitely toxic and a trigger for me. I can go down the rabbit hole real quick. I can pretty much pervert and twist any social to get some type of sexual gratification from it… its bad.
We used to go every 2 weeks and hella stock up on meats and all the major items. I’ve had some health risks come up over the past few mo ths so I eat a bit differently now, so I make it a point to go to this pther grocery store out of town once a week.
It is pretty beautiful though. I’ll have to take some pics for you sometime.
Idk yet. We were done having kids and she got a hysterectomy. Im not snipped but now since well likely divorce I may keep mu options open in case I find a newer spouse later and may have kids. So, we’ll see. How mnay kids do you have?
Damn, he’s a punk @$$ b@stard. I’ll leave it at that and apologies if that’s overstepping on my part.
Yeah, I can see how that situation would make you feel guilty and have self hate attached to it. I’m glad youre out of that relationship and I hope your daughter is getting all the help for that experience. I know that PTSD has to be wild for her
