Really great to read your post. Well done. Keep going!
I’ll never hide the truth folks as you’re fighting alongside me and I respect you all loads - I fell forwards on my face today. A fantasy dream, some early morning thoughts followed by surfing the Web for a few hours and pmo’ing. I don’t need to say it as you know the truth already…it felt horrible and disgusting even while in the act. I regret it and I’ve repented it. I hate it so much. Why did I do it?? I didnt process the urge correctly and just folded rather than getting on with a good day. Lent is upon us and I’m abstaining completely from this worthless bleach! Always feel bad posting my mistakes because of pride, shame and I don’t want to disappoint you lot!
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Be careful not to be too harsh on yourself. Guilt is healthy, shame is destructive. Remember all the times you said no to PMO compared to this one time of saying yes. You gave in, consider it a learning experience and prepare for it in the future. You’ve got this.
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Thanks. Lesson learnt! Back to freedom!
You said it: fall forward. I would immediately strengthen your resolve via rereading easy peasy or whatever you use. We all fail short… its what you do next that determines how the rest of this year will go. We are all in this together. Be strong bro.
Thanks bro. Day 2 sober and determined. No more PMO, no dwelling on fantasy or lust. Tidying house. Processing urges and seeing them for what they are. Have a strong day!
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Some urge to watch porn tonight as wife away but wised up - too much at stake now!! It’s just a big lie and offers me nothing but instead causes so much damage. The little monster just wants it fix…from anywhere!! Hope you’re all keeping in the battle!
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Had to quit the dating apps, it’s too triggering feels like a big rush of dopamine and chemicals swiping all the girls and some of them have very triggering images for me. Also found it easy to follow links to instagram and see even more images like that. 
It’s sucks since I would like to start dating again.
Haven’t mo or pmo though. +45 days now.
Hope you all are well!
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Social media, Instagram etc far too triggering for me!! Facebook as well… a few clicks I could undo all my effort to stay clean. Still sober here but have had to work through urges the last few days. I’m not running from them but calling them out and processing them. Trying to take the urge, see it for what it is and not pmo…retraining my brain.
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Just about hitting 1 week. No PMO. Triggers are there on occasion but I can literally see them for what they are and instead do something good with my life. Hope you are all OK?
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Doing good bro! Keep fighting. I’m doing good. Day 108. Just turned 41 and I feel free. Sober 2022 is what matters most to me…a clean conscience for a whole year…bro…personal growth is what I’m chasing. It’s happening every day man. I’ve waited 20 years. 20. Started from the bottom now we here!!!
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It’s very nice to have you join us. My journey of recovery has lasted about 30 years so far and it’s been full of twists and turns and dead ends. So I see a little bit of myself in your testimony.
Anyways, I’m all about continuously seeking new methods. Part of my journey includes 12 years in SAA and SLAA. Looking back, I understand that God had a different path for me. So if something doesn’t work or stops working, instead of trying harder, I try different.
If you haven’t checked out Easy Peasy yet, it can’t hurt. One can read it within several days.
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Welcome to the fire!
Thank you for your wise words. It’s easy to see our progress sometimes and think, “I’m doing good enough… I can’t slip up now… I’m far enough along that there’s no way I could mess up” but even in these moments, weather we’re a few days in to several years into our recovery, we ALL have opportunities to grow.
The important thing is you recognize the need to connect with like minded brothers and own up to your mistakes. Never hide what you do. It’s this tenancy to hide that starts the cycle of addiction all over again. Stay strong, stand tall, reach out for help before it gets too heavy.
You’ve got this 
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Great effort with the 5 months!! Truly inspirational. I’m early on at 7 days but loving the freedom from my old struggles!
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Congrats bro! 5 months with the addiction is huge and is only the beginning!
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This is great news! Congratulations on 5 months!
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I’m loving this attitude. Congratulations on those 7 days, AND ENJOYING THEM TOO!
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Day 9 - no longer consuming pmo for instant gratification but looking to the future and creating something far better. Have a great day free from bleach!!
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On Day 10 and have battled real urges this morning plus triggers. Working hard to see them for the lies they are and re train my brain from the past.
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