5 months was an amazing achievement and to do that I’m sure you put some things in place to help you along the way. Sometimes we lose focus and drift off course and by the sounds of it that’s what you have done.
But you haven’t lost that 5 months. You’ve just hit a blip. It’s worth going back over what you did that was so effective before. Reread those sections of easy Peasy around brainwashing and the little monster. Remind yourself of those tools you already have in your locker.
At the end of the day we are addicts. Our addictive behaviour has created strong neural pathways. It is going to take time for those to start to erode.
You have gone longer than me without PMO. You’ve put a marker in the sand. Great job! Now it’s time to pick yourself back up again, reset and go again. You can do it.
I felt incredibly deflated after my relapsing. I thought with the new knowledge that I understood from Easy Peasy, my sober streak would continue. I guess there was just more to learn. It’s important for me to not throw the whole baby out with the bathwater. Even though Alan Carr refers to EasyWay as a cure, for me, I’ve just had to accept it as one of the many tools that God has provided for me to help me break free.
Keep learning, keep searching for more tools. If you seek, you shall find. I’m glad to hear you’re not giving up.
I’m glad you’re here. You had 8 months. That was awesome. I’m sorry to hear about the relapse. I know how that feels after having such a long clean time.
Are you aware of anything that would have led up to the relapse?
I read another one of your posts mentioning that you also relapsed with alcohol. It wouldn’t surprise me that it was a factor in your relapse with pmo.
Relapses are opportunities to learn what God is trying to teach me. Perhaps with a little bit more time of self-reflection, you might be able to understand yourself a little more. Thanks for sharing. Don’t give up. You must have been doing a lot of things right to get as far as you’ve gotten.
It humbles me too. I don’t have as much control as I’d like. So I confess that I need to involve God in my life more than ever before.
I believe that your PMO relapse led to your alcohol relapse.
It is said that relapse happens before one actually acts out. I believe this especially true with PMO. Can you identify any behaviors or crossing of boundaries before relapse with PMO?
I loved the meetings I went to. I completed some of the books, got pins, and really lookd forward to it. Then i moved across country and there wasn’t one nearby.
Ps yes ik this is of topic to the thread, so i won’t keep referencing it. I just didn’t ever meet anyone else that went to ru.
Hi,
Im Andrew. Im 27 year’s old. I’m been struggling with this addiction for all my life since my step brother showed me when i was about 5 or 6. I don’t remember much about looking at porn when i got older, but i started doing more things that led up to watching it every day and even masterbated multiple times befor the hour hour. I’m not proud of anything that i do but i have a family now a wife of 3 years and a daughter who just tuned 1 this year.
I guess i should start at the beginning, i remember being with my step brother in his room when he first showed me i wasn't into it because i was only about 5 years old. He abused me alot when i was a kid mentally and physically. Some days he would break my toys and try and "drown" me in the pool. There were several times when i got a little bit older that he would dress me up in girls clothes and made me go to the bathroom like one.
But when i got older in middle school, thats when i had a laptop and a phone and i had really easy access to the internet… to the porn so instead of doing my homework i would watch porn or look at it, maybe thats why i didnt have any confidence in picking up women . But it was right there and thats all i would do when im not around anyone else.
And now i cant stop, every single day that all i want to do. When my wife wants sex I’ve usually already masterbated and it doesnt work or somehow i fake it or when im at work i would go to the bathroom and watch it and usually get one out.
I’ve already miss alot of stuff in my life because of the porn and masterbation i dont want to miss out on my daughters life or on another kids life if we plan on having another one.
RU is a hidden gem of recovery resources. Not many are aware of. I learned a lot of unique tools from RU that I still embrace today. My family and I recently started going back to those meetings. But they recently stopped using the RU format. Now, they use a different one, Simple Steps. I liked the RU format better. But the group still provides me a lot of encouragement to repair my broken relationship with God. That’s a must for me in breaking free from porn.
. But it was right there and thats all i would do when im not around anyone else.