Quote of the Day: "Realize that true happiness lies within you. Waste no time and effort searching for peace and contentment and joy in the world outside. Remember that there is no happiness in having or in getting, but only in giving. Reach out. Share. Smile. Hug. Happiness is a perfume you cannot pour on others without getting a few drops on yourself." Og Mandino
Before the program, I was convinced that happiness was a by-product of what we have. I truly thought that the more stuff you had, the happier youâd be. Sadly, I had a limited moral compass when it came to getting what I wanted, which usually led to stepping on others to get it. I now know that a walled off heart, or clenched fist, never receives anything of value. The program has taught me that happiness doesnât come as a result of getting something we donât have, but rather to be thankful for what we do have. We donât pray to get what we want; we pray to want what we get. Itâs impossible to give without receiving, just as it is impossible to receive without giving. Itâs counterintuitive to think we gain lasting happiness by giving to others, but that is were we truly find lasting contentment. Our hardwiring is directed towards self preservation and selfish desires, so being of complete service to others has to be a conscious and ongoing effort. The day we learn that life doesnât happen to you, but instead, it happens for you, is the day we begin our odyssey of enlightenment. I am so grateful the program reminds me to focus on today, and that what I do today will undoubtedly improve all my tomorrows. The road to my happiness has been paved by helping others, and this simple principle has brought me a contentment I never thought possible. Kindness is contagious, and we are so blessed to be able to spread the love and care of the fellowship in all aspects of our lives.
Quote of the Day: "In the beginnerâs mind there are many possibilities; in the expertâs mind there are few." Shunryu Suzuki
The moment I think, âI have this thing,â is the moment Iâm on my way to a slip. Iâve learned a great deal over the years about our program, but I always seem to have a new revelation or epiphany at just the right moment. In fact, the wisdom we gain after we think we know it all is probably the most valuable knowledge we can gain. An open mind is one of the essentials of sobriety (p. 468), but it is also critical to our emotional and spiritual growth. Remaining teachable is a primary essence of humility, and a cornerstone of our recovery. I love that Iâm able to hear and learn new things at every meeting I attend. When I moved to south Orange County from Los Angeles, I thought I had a firm handle about our program, God, and spirituality. I was new to the area and knew no one, so I felt like a newcomer, but this soon transcended into the realization that I had much to learn. This area is a mecca of recovery, and each room has pillars of sobriety that have continued a tradition and culture of serious healing through the steps, Big Book study, and deep spirituality. I was apprehensive to move here and leave my support group, but it ended up reenergizing my program of recovery. By maintaining an open mind, I have grown, learned, and changed so much. I hope I can sustain the necessary humility to remain teachable forever. Through continual learning, the program has stayed fresh in my heart, and for this, I am eternally grateful.
Quote of the Day: "For most of us, the first years of A.A. are something like a honeymoon. There is a new and potent reason to stay alive, joyful activity aplenty. For a time, we are diverted from the main life problems. That is all to the good. But when the honeymoon has worn off, we are obliged to take our lumps, like other people. This is where the testing starts. Maybe the group has pushed us onto the side lines. Maybe difficulties have intensified at home, or in the world outside. Then the old behavior patterns reappear. How well we recognize and deal with them reveals the extent of our progress."
As Bill Sees It, After the âHoneymoon,â p. 216
After the initial confusion and fog of entering our rooms in those first days of recovery, we all cross into different stages of a sobriety honeymoon. For some, this honeymoon lasts years, but for most, something happens early on that reminds us that life is in session. Another aspect of our changing moods in that first year is the onset of suppressed emotions. All those emotions that we had anesthetized for so long come rushing back. These emotional upheavals are nothing short of overwhelming, and we find ourselves breaking down over the smallest things. Iâve come to realize that these emotions are completely normal. Emotional pain is just fear leaving the body! One of the blessings of our program is that we can jump right back on the honeymoon flying carpet once that life challenge passes by. The more faith I developed, the more life seemed to flow without extended drama from conflict. Issues still came up, but they didnât seem to impact me as much as they used to. So, our realm of being in a sobriety honeymoon is dependent on our spirituality, which also has a direct correlation to our attitudes and perspectives on life. Each day we are faced with a decision to live in faith, gratitude, acceptance, and hope, but itâs up to us to make that spiritual and emotional choice.
Quote of the Day: "Still goaded by sheer necessity, we reluctantly come to grips with those serious character flaws that made problem drinkers of us in the first place, flaws which must be dealt with to prevent a retreat into alcoholism once again. We will want to be rid of some of these defects, but in some instances this will appear to be an impossible job from which we recoil. And we cling with a passionate persistence to others (defects, such as pride and ego) which are just as disturbing to our equilibrium, because we still enjoy them too much." Twelve Steps and Twelve Traditions, p. 73
There is very little explanation or direction in our Big Book on the 6th and 7th steps except for asking for the willingness and then saying the 7th step prayer. There is however, throughout the Big Book, many examples of how self and our character flaws caused discomfort in our lives. For me, seeing how my character defects negatively impact my life was critical to any hope of finding peace and serenity. If I am truly honest with myself, I can see how every time I am in discomfort, I can trace it back to some character defect that I let get the best of me. Being aware that these shortcomings exist and have a debilitating effect on us, is the first step in mitigating them in the future. To minimize our shortcomings, it is also vital to see the connection to step 3. When we turn our âwillâ over to the care of God, we are turning over our âself-will.â Our self-will are all of our character defects. âGodâs willâ are the opposites of all our character defects (ex. Dishonesty = self-will; Honesty = Godâs will). So, that daily surrender to turn our will over to the care of God is directly related to our character defects, how we will conduct ourselves that day, and the comfort level we may experience.
Quote of the Day: "Keep love in your heart. A life without it is like a sunless garden, where the flowers are all dead. The consciousness of loving and being loved brings a warmth and richness to life that nothing else can bring." Oscar Wilde
I am so grateful that I am entrenched in a fellowship that encourages so much love and support. When I walk into a room of AA, I often take a moment to let the feeling of love and genuine care wash over me. I may not even know you, but I know we share a common experience and commitment to recovery. This instant connection is the beginning of a blossoming friendship and the seeds to love and true caring for each other. Having taken the steps that allowed me to shed the negative perceptions of myself and others, my heart has been opened to find the good in others. Realizing we are all Godâs children has also been a blessing, and a bridge to allowing love in all areas of my life. Genuine care and kindness is one of the purest expressions of love, and life presents us with endless opportunities to tap into this limitless emotion. When filled with love for others, itâs impossible to be controlled by hate or anger. Our deepening faith and spirituality is also central to allowing love in our hearts. As our perception of life softens, so too does our perception of others. We are all on this journey together, and I firmly believe Godâs intention for us is to learn, grow, and nurture the love that is in all of us.
Quote of the Day: "Every A.A. has been, in a sense, a prisoner. Each of us has walled himself out of society; each has known social stigma. The lot of you folks have been even more difficult: In your case, society has also built a wall around you. But there isnât any really essential difference, a fact that practically all A.A.'s now know."
Bill W., Letter to a prison group
There is no greater prison than being alone and locked in your own mind. This is an existence all too familiar for the practicing alcoholic. We were all in a living hell, and for me, death seemed to be a step up. When there is no hope left in your life, everything is tainted with an overwhelming darkness. As I look back, Iam grateful for this bottom, but I would not wish it on anyone. The debilitating self-pity, coupled with the fear of never being able to free yourself from alcohol, was pure torture. There is a beautiful line in one of the 3rd edition stories that sums us up, -Alcohol gave us wings to fly, but then it took away the sky-. They say AA canât open the gates of heaven and let us in, but it can open the gates of hell and let us out. After the initial detox, it didnât take long for me to see that I belonged in our fellowship. You understood me and had gone through the same living prison we all experience. Itâs amazing what we can find in a cup of coffee at a meeting, what we used to try to find in endless bottles. Our members exude genuine care and kindness, and you canât help but want what they have. I am so thankful that I no longer have to be beholden to alcohol, but I am also grateful I never have to be a prisoner to resentments, self-pity, or any of the other negative thoughts that kept me from finding freedom and happiness.
Quote of the Day: Grace strikes us when we are in great pain and restlessness. Sometimes at that moment a wave of light breaks into our darkness, and it is as though a voice were saying: "You are accepted." Paul Tillich
Before the program, I would wallow in self-pity and never hesitated to play the victim card. Needless to say, I was not a happy person, and I was haunted by my self inflicted pain. I now see that it was all necessary to get to where I needed to be, and that was a place of complete desperation. Only through complete misery and torment could I find enough willingness to make dramatic and necessary changes in my life. They say that pain and suffering are an Alcoholics best friend, because they are the only things sharp enough to cut through our pride and ego. It has been a long journey back from the depths of the abyss I had created, but it has all been worth it. The Chinese symbol for crisis and opportunity are very similar, and I see that as an analogy of our disease. Through a darkness and a life lived in the shadows, comes an amazing awakening into a light of hope and gratitude. Once I learned that self was the problem, then self couldnât be the answer, a new world and perception opened up for me. I am so thankful that I now firmly believe that the bidding of God will never take me where the love of God will not shelter me. One of the greatest gifts of the program has been a path in which I can honestly say to myself, I am enough. When we accept ourselves, we are no longer crucified by the burden of needing others to accept us, and this is an amazing freedom I hope all of us discover.
Quote of the Day: "When I first came to A.A., I thought everybody had drunk more than I had, that everybody had gotten into more trouble. But I kept coming to meetings, and after a while, I began to hear the beginnings of their stories. I came to realize that I was on the same road. I just hadnât gone as farâyet." Alcoholics Anonymous Big book, p. 369
All of our bottoms are very personal. We experienced a living hell in our heads and saw no way out. We may not have lost everything âyet,â but those feelings of hopelessness are universal. My disease would tell me all the time that it wasnât that bad, and thatâs a voice I have to expel immediately. We hear all kinds of stories when we come into the program, and many seem worse than ours. Our disease will immediately arch up and tell us we werenât that low. We suffer from terminal uniqueness and are forever swayed by a disease that wants to kill us. Alcoholism is truly cunning, baffling, and powerful, and we would be wise to never forget the crushing feelings of despair as we were hitting our own bottom(s). Alcoholism is a progressive disease that never gets better; it only gets worse. The scouts who go out and test this proposition, if they make it back, come back with the same narrative â It got bad quickly and wasnât worth it! Whenever my disease tries to tell me it wasnât that bad, I remind myself that it could have been much worse. I never got a DUI, but I should have had more than I could count. I wasnât a homeless guy living in a box on the street, but there were many times I had no place I could call âmy home.â If I were a cat, I certainly used up all my 9-lives. Our bottom is when we stop digging, and when we stop digging, there is no elevator out of that hole; we have to take the steps.
Quote of the Day: "Ego was being replaced with self-respect ⌠resentment and hatred were being replaced with tolerance and understanding ⌠fear was being replaced with trust ⌠loneliness and self-pity were being replaced with gratitude and love â all because I was working the program to the best of my ability and wasnât drinking." "Above All, an Alcoholic," Toledo, Ohio, September 1982, In Our Own Words: Stories of Young AAs in Recovery
Change is difficult, and our reluctance to change almost killed us. People are hesitant to change, even if itâs a positive change. Itâs human nature to get overly comfortable with what we know, and it takes courage to let go of the familiar. In the past, we hung onto righteous indignation, only to find out we were only hurting ourselves. We let fears dominate our life and control our decision making, only to find out we were holding ourselves back from fulfilling our hopes and dreams. We put ourselves in a constant state of loneliness even though a loving God was there with us the whole time. Nietzsche once said, The snake which cannot cast its skin will die. This is so true of the alcoholic that slithers into the fellowship. If we donât change, our sobriety date will! I am so grateful that our program encourages us to change, and for most of us, this is a gradual process. In many aspects of our lives, there may be a complete upheaval of thoughts or actions, but it is more common to have small epiphanies that push us into a spiritual way of living. Iâm not sure how bad my life would have been without AA, but I probably would have died a horrible death after a prolonged existence of relentless and emotional pain. Because of our fellowship, I have become the person I was always intended to be, and I will be forever grateful for you teaching me the joys of living a meaningful and purposeful life.
Quote of the Day: "Besides a seeming inability to accept much on faith, we often found ourselves handicapped by obstinacy, sensitiveness, and unreasoning prejudice. Many of us have been so touchy that even casual reference to spiritual things made us bristle with antagonism. This sort of thinking had to be abandoned. Though some of us resisted, we found no great difficulty in casting aside such feelings." Alcoholics Anonymous, pp. 47 - 48
As I reflect back on when I first got sober, I can laugh at myself on how obstinate I was when it came to God and spirituality. Itâs easy for me to now see that my disease was just looking for a loophole to hit the door. I discarded the notion of spirituality with the simplistic thought that, I tried it growing up, but it never really worked for me. Thankfully, our program encourages us to find a Higher Power of our own understanding. The God I knew was a child perception of God and very fear based, as every child would be. I needed an adult perception of God, and I found it in the love of our fellowship. I wanted your happiness and contentment, and you all seemed to accept the idea of God. I certainly didnât want what I had, so you would think accepting change would have come easy. No. I had to kick, scream and resist until I started having undeniable spiritual experiences. The first was that I stayed sober in spite of myself. Others came as I walked through each step, especially the 4th, 5th, and 9th steps. Today, I love my life, and the relationship I have with God. The God of my understanding loves me unconditionally and wants the best for me. Through deep faith, my life has so much more meaning, and I canât imagine ever living that shallow existence I had before accepting the loving arms of God and our fellowship.
Quote of the Day: "When Iâm willing to pay the price for top-shelf sobriety, âactionâ is still the magic word." "Paying the Price for Improvement,"
Craig, Colorado, January 1997, Emotional Sobriety II
Laziness could be one of our most threatening character defects. It not only keeps us from achieving our goals, it also convinces us that we donât need to take more action to stay on a solid path of recovery. It is so true that, We canât think our way into right action. We have to act our way into right thinking. I know what I need to do to stay sober, but it means nothing if I donât put it into action. If my disease is centered in my mind, then recovery is centered in my deeds and conduct. For me, positive action towards my recovery requires constant contrary action. I can convince myself very easily to just stay home and not go to that meeting, not pick up the phone, not take the time to meditate, or not pick up the pen to write. I also have to remind myself never to mistake motion for purposeful action. If itâs not inconvenient, then itâs probably not service! I know that if I give 100% to this program, just as I did my active addiction, I have a 100% chance of staying sober and on a path to serenity. John Kennedy once said, There are risks and costs to a program of action, but they are far less than the long range risks and costs of comfortable inaction. The risk of inaction in recovery is certain, and it will ultimately always lead me down a path of sadness and despair. On the other hand, taking continual action towards recovery reaps benefits beyond my imagination, but it is still up to me to take that contrary action.
Quote of the Day: "By admitting where I was at fault, I was given the ability to forgive⌠With forgiveness came a freedom that I had not anticipated. The amends had required nothing but courage, and a faith that my Higher Power would carry me where I had been too afraid to walk alone."
Grapevine, âScene of the Crime,â Sterling, Alaska, September 1993, Step By Step
For the entirety of my life prior to the program, I was a walking ball of resentments. Life had dealt me a lame hand, and I was going to ride that victim card as long as I could to justify my drinking and bad behavior. I am so thankful that our program had the insight to have us inventory our resentments and to list our part, no matter how small. Only through admitting my part could I find any sense of forgiveness for those I felt wronged me. Finding that forgiveness didnât change the past, but it did change my perspective on life. Until I was able to shed that anger and to find forgiveness, I had no idea how draining it was to hang on to my righteous indignation. It also helped when someone explained that forgiveness isnât condoning the behavior; itâs clearing the cancerous hate from your heart. However, it was still very difficult for me to let go of certain resentments, and to walk that longest mile between my mind and my heart. The knowledge and necessity of forgiveness enters from our head, but it must ultimately exit from our heart. I have made all my amends and continue to make living amends, so the only thing left for me to do is to forgive others and myself. I certainly didnât come into the program thinking I needed to forgive, but through this spiritual act, I have found a peace I never thought possible.
Quote of the Day: "I will take time today to stop and give a gift to someone needy, smile at a stranger or help a small child. I will take the time to do at least one thing that I usually find myself too busy to do, and I will inwardly smile at myself, taking the time to experience the feelings of my own kindness."
Ruth Fishel
At one of our memberâs 100th birthday celebration, he said that he already picked out what would be on his tombstone. It would simply read, âThe joy of living, is the joy of giving.â This simple saying succinctly captures my evolved ideal for living. Our program teaches us that we canât keep it unless we give it away, and this philosophy can easily spill out into all areas of our lives. It is also very important that we realize that our giving must be free of ulterior motives, and be altruistic in nature. At first, this transformation is difficult, because self-centeredness was so much of how we coped with life. Itâs been my experience that the reasoning for being kind to others can evolve and grow into one without motives. I had to âfake it until you make itâ at first, but it didnât take long for me to see the immense benefits of giving without any expectation of anything in return. The more I gave of myself, the more I became accepting of whom I was becoming. The conscious act of trying to be kind to others started me on a spiritual journey I didnât even know existed. As I allowed trust to be built through understanding, compassion, and kindness, I was able to connect to people in a much deeper and meaningful way. Iâve learned that life presents endless opportunities to make a deep impact on someoneâs life, and I hope when those moments come, Iâll have a hug, smile, kind word, or gesture that will brighten someoneâs day.
Quote of the Day: Skillful speech not only means that we pay attention to the words we speak and to their tone but also requires that our words reflect compassion and concern for others and that they help and heal, rather than wound and destroy."
Bhante Henepola Gunaratana
If we speak in anger, we will more than likely make the best speech we will ever regret. My tongue has gotten me in more trouble than I would like to admit. Open mouth, insert foot! Prior to taking the steps, I always seemed to have an overwhelming need to chime in on every discussion. Thankfully, the program, especially working with others, has taught me to be a better listener. If we are doing all the talking, then we are doing none of the listening. If in doubt, donât say it. So that we donât inflame a situation with any unnecessary emotional outbursts, it may be better to not say anything when tension is brewing. Sometimes, the best response, is no response. I also try to avoid the 3 Câs â donât criticize, condemn, or complain. Words can be biting and hurtful, and once said, we canât take them back. We have tools to clean up our messes, but trust is fragile and hard to restore. We would be wise to hit the pause button during conflict or emotion, and truly think before we speak (or donât speak). Another valuable lesson is to manage our tone. Unfortunately, a good message can be totally lost if the wrong tone is used. A raised or angry voice can never convey anything of substance. The person will remember you were pissed off, not what you said. Today, Iâm not perfect and still a work in progress, but I am so much better at using discretion and kindness rather than hurtful commentary.
Quote of the Day: "Let us continue to search our own minds for the hidden places where we still deny love. Perhaps we learned loveless attitudes from our parents, or from experiences in the past. Wherever we picked up judgmental attitudes, they do not serve us now. They do not serve God or the creation of a new world, and serving God is our only goal. To serve God is to think with love. In prayerful request, let us give up all thoughts that are not of love."
Marianne Williamson
Most of us come into the program with an extreme amount of emotional baggage. Much of that damage was done living in a dysfunctional family. Many of us have settled with the acknowledgement that our parents did the best they could with what they had, but they probably did some serious damage. Perhaps it was generational, but more than likely, they too had dysfunctional upbringings. Sadly, passing on emotional and physical abuse becomes a haunting cycle in families. When we take the steps, we begin to see how profoundly we are impacted by circumstances around us. Breaking the cycle of dysfunction and abuse may be one of the most consequential benefits of our fellowship. Only by processing my own baggage did I become keenly aware that âeverythingâ I did and said would have a profound impact on my children. I had to learn to love my children the most, when they deserved it the least. Having children taught me absolute unconditional love. I may not always approve of my kidâs behavior, but I will always love them unconditionally. This too is the relationship I have with God. We are all Godâs kids, and though God may not condone our behavior, God forgives us and loves us unconditionally. We all have lived some form of trauma, some more than others, so it is vital to process these issues in order to live a healthy life and to be able to fully love others.
Quote of the Day: "Someone once wrote: Happiness is always a by-product. You donât make yourself happy by chasing happiness. You make yourself happy by being a good person. The happiest people I know are people who donât even think about being happy. They just think about being good neighbors, good people. And then happiness sort of sneaks in the back window while theyâre busy doing good."
Rabbi Harold Kushner
In early sobriety, I would marvel at how contented the oldtimers looked. They would just sit back in meetings and smile. I wasnât sure what they had, but they seemed to have the answers to life. I now recognize that as being a by-product of a lifetime of service. When we make that transformation from being takers to givers, remarkable things happen. Our perception of the world around us evolves, and we begin to see the good in others. When we give of ourselves, we begin to appreciate all the small blessings life has to offer. When I had less than a year of sobriety, I got a fortune cookie that said, The road to your happiness will be paved by helping others. I had just started sponsoring others, and was very active in the program, so the timing of that message was perfect. That simple saying has become very prophetic and a guiding force in my life. Lasting contentment is an inside job, and one we can only find through service towards others. Being of service not only leads to happiness, it has also been the answer to the noise that goes on in our heads. When those character defects start dancing around in our minds, one of the best solutions is to help others. We come into the program to stop drinking and using, but we end up finding a life of serenity, peace, and happiness that none of us thought possible.
Quote of the Day: "Today, help me, God, to let go of my resistance to change. Help me to be open to the process. Help me believe that the place Iâll be dropped off will be better than the place where I was picked up. Help me surrender, trust, and accept, even if I donât understand."
Melody Beattie
It is interesting that so many of us come into the program with hostility towards open mindedness. You would think that the realization that, âMy way doesnât work,â would easily pave the way for openness to new ideas and ways of living life, yet so many of us die on that hill of obstinacy and stubbornness. Iâm so grateful that the program encouraged me to be open to a new perspective on virtually every aspect of my life. Being open minded to spirituality was probably the most important factor of my recovery, and the launch pad for nearly every positive change that would soon unfold within me. Through a belief in the program process, came a small belief in a Power greater than myself that could solve my problems. However, as most of us, I hung on to old ideas and notions of how I should think and act. Not being open to change only trapped me in self-will, which ultimately always led me back to discomfort. Only after a litany of self-will propelled mistakes pummeled me into submission, did I find the freedom of completely surrendering to God. Before we fully accept that Godâs plan for us is so much better than our own, we alcoholics usually have to learn the hard way and experience hardship for ourselves. God has never given me more than I can handle, but he has always given me everything I need. Today, I donât fear the future, because I know God will be there waiting for me. May Godâs grace gently wrap you in much gratitude and love on this blessed holiday. Happy Easter!
Quote of the Day: "None of us has the power to make someone else love us. But we all have the power to give away love, to love other people. And if we do so, we change the kind of person we are, and we change the kind of world we live in."
Rabbi Harold Kushner
Handbook for the Heart
I had to experience all the work, trials, tribulations and benefits of the program for myself. If someone told me in early sobriety that I was incapable of fully loving, I would have discarded that notion as nonsense. Then, as I took each step and processed life, I began to feel emotions deeper than I ever had before. These deeper emotions shocked and overwhelmed me. At first, feeling emotions was so uncomfortable; I thought I was always on the verge of snapping or breaking down. However, I trusted you and the process, and I let these new emotions flow in and through me. In early recovery, I remember making a conscious decision that I wanted to feel everything, both good and bad. I realized that if I shut off negative emotions, I would also shut out the positive, such as fully loving another. Bill Wilson once said, When brimming with gratitude, oneâs heartbeat must surely result in outgoing love. The programâs gift of understanding and realizing that gratitude opened the door for me to love and forgive myself, also enabled me to more completely love others. The love within our fellowship is undeniable, and we are able to carry that kindness out into our daily lives. Iam convinced that if each of us make a commitment of kindness, that collectively we can change the community and people around us. AA has brought a level of love and kindness to the world that is nothing short of miraculous, and I feel so privileged to be a part of that spiritual gift.
Quote of the Day: "How then can we let our wills dominate our impulses? The key word is wait. Whatever happens, we must put some space between the hostile act directed toward us and our response. We must distance ourselves, take time to think, talk it over with friends, and wait until we are ready to respond in a life-giving way. Impulsive responses allow evil to master us, something we always will regret."
Henri Nouwen
Our book tells us to pause when agitated or doubtful (p. 87), and this small suggestion could be the difference between irrevocable conflict or peaceful resolution. Hitting the pause button before reacting was something that I only learned through the program, but I wish I would have learned this at a much earlier age. Reacting, without thinking it through, caused so much unnecessary havoc in my life. My Irish temper and short fuse was a formula for disaster. As I reflect back, I was punishing myself for, and by my own anger. Impulsive reactions scare and alienate people, and destructive behavior usually drives people away. It is clear to me now that letting my character defects (self-will) redline only causes me harm. Pausing before reacting enables me to lean back towards Godâs will. In todayâs society, restraint of tongue and pen is not enough; we have to show restraint before hitting send in emails, texts, or any other social media. I have found a sponsors second opinion to be a godsend when it comes to emotional responses. For me, emotional responses end up being snarky or biting, which results in having to make yet another awkward amend. I was a slave to my anger for a very long time, but the fellowship freed me from this debilitating character flaw. Life has become so much easier to live when I am not leaving a debris field behind me, and I owe it all to the program.
This is my biggest defect so many times have I told myself too late â Next time take a breath or just shut upâ.
We are far from perfect and how boring would life be if all the lessons were learnt, Iâll continue to practice on a daily basis and although Iâve asked God to remove all my defects Iâm not sure what day he is going to start so until then Iâll have to watch my step.
