Ok that’s reassuring, thanks.
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How about the finances? There were loan sharks last year, etc; that web is a process to untangle and then to grow healthier, stabler financial habits. It’s all interconnected addictions (moving back and forth from one to another).
Lea asked a good question above: what do you picture as the ideal result here for your family? Is it having a stable family life? That’s a nice vision to have. There are building blocks that can make that possible. Healthy emotional and behaviour patterns you two can build. Do you have some sober friends and group members or counsellors who are working with you guys to build those? 
Right i get it, you were just hoping everyone was gonna take your side. Sorry, my vision is a little more clear now. Someone says try a.a… I hate a.a but thanks you say, shows me you obviously aren’t willing to do w.e it takes to stay sober for your daughter… A.A wouldn’t of called cps on you. So don’t blame the system blame yourself
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We are slowly getting back on our feet with finances.
Yes ideally we want a happy, healthy, stable life but like I just explained we couldn’t get the Counselling we seeked out because the hospital reported us. Hopefully family services won’t be a threat and will be able to help us get the help we need.
No need to be a smart arse. No, I wasn’t just hoping everyone was going to take my side, I was wanting to hear of some other people’s opinions on the matter and I did get some helpful insight.
Just because I hate AA doesn’t mean I don’t want help. I go to SMART RECOVERY meetings
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Fingers crossed. Life has a way of giving us what we need wrapped in a package that sometimes we don’t recognize. The nice thing about groups (there are many different types - check out here: Resources for our recovery) is they have all the parts of counseling - people talking, sharing, walking a path, going over steps, structure - but they’re free. So when moneys tight, groups are a path that works to build the skills we need to have stable family time.
You’ve got everything you need to move forward one step at a time. I bet you’re nervous or worried or maybe there’s stuff you wish could be different - lord knows that’s how anyone would feel. But take it one day at a time and keep an open mind, you’ll find what you need.
Yes it’s hard. Do it anyway (Just like sweeping the floor or doing the dishes! 
Oh how life is like parenting sometimes: yes it’s not what we wanted - do it anyway! This will be a good story to tell yo ur daughter when she’s older - how you made things work, by buckling down and doing what needed to be done. You’re a good mom and you’re doing the right thing by getting the job done )
Not being a smart ass. Just trying to help push you towards the right direction. When I was stuck in addiction, I always said I wanted to change but didn’t really. So I wouldn’t try, a.a. or anything I always said I could do it on my own. Once I actually just about lost every damn thing, expect my two beautiful girls thank God. I was ready to do w.e it took, and that included a.a even tho I hated it… I don’t attend them much now, but they did help me. I hope whatever path you chose if helps and I will pray for you and your family. You guys deserve a fun sober life.
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Thanks for such a lovely, encouraging post and for the resources. I’ll definitely look in to them.
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But AA is not the right direction for me. I am completely willing and keen to get sober but I don’t need to do something I don’t agree with like AA in order to do that. There are other options.
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True. Do your thing, like I said I hope all turns out well. Have a good night and I hope to hear some good news from you. Take care
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I’m just worried about losing my daughter for trying to get help. Hopefully it doesn’t come to that and family services might even be able to help us.
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Yeah so I’m one of the historically harsh/judgmental people. I’m not being harsh or judgmental here but just reading what you have written as you have written it. So heads up.
I don’t think its a bad thing that Family Services are investigating you - Like you said, you were trying to do the right thing, right? Family Services wont look at it as 2 people who were trying to do the right thing. They’ll be looking at it as “We have a 5 year old living with 2 people who have come forward for help getting sober - Is the 5 year old safe in this environment?” It isn’t their job to be compassionate for you; it’s their job to ensure the wellbeing of a child in a potentially dangerous environment.
In my opinion, this isn’t the right way to look at it. If you’d have kept on your destructive path, trouble would’ve come of it - Inevitably. And probably far far worse because that’s the nature of a destructive path.
In my opinion, the people who you approached were just doing their job and probably acted responsibly and I also think that while you feel the system may have failed you, the system has done what it is meant to do and looked out for the wellbeing of your daughter which must feel bittersweet given that you’ve reached out to get sober.
All the best.
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Feeling worried at the possibility of losing access to your daughter is totally understandable in this situation. Let that be your motivation to throw everything into your sobriety work. Come out stronger on the other side.
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You gotta be clear here, crystal clear: your enemy is your addiction. It’s not people, it’s not government, it’s not anybody else. Your enemy, that you’re boxing, the one your fighting here, is your addiction.
Beat your addiction, and you can’t lose. Nothing else matters. You beat your addiction and everything else will fall into place.
Go win. You know what you need to do. Go win your fight 
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I know their job is to consider the well being of the child, that’s what worries me. I don’t want her taken from me, she is my everything.
I mentioned staying on a destructive path in sarcasm because looking for help didn’t work.
I’m so sorry my daughter has a fuck up of a Mother. I just want to get better and stay with her. I love her so much.
I’ve been doing SMART RECOVERY and as I said, looking for a Counsellor. I’ve already said this.
Hey hey 
Forgive me but I’m a little confused about the intent of the post. Did you want opinions on the system? Or opinions on what you should do as a result of what happened? Opinion s on alcohol recovery options? It’s kind of vague to me. Maybe it’s more of a vent? I could understand venting for sure when you feel you’re doing the right thing. Maybe some clarification of what you’re asking of us will create more constructive answers.
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Btw you are not trying to help me by questioning my efforts and sincerity to stay sober. And the reason I said I’m sorry my daughter has a fuck of a Mother is because that’s what it seems some people on here are pushing for me to say
You may have said it sarcastically but there is an element of truth behind every piece of sarcasm otherwise sarcasm wouldn’t work. And you’re not wrong - You could’ve stayed on a destructive path but you didn’t because you want the best for your daughter. That’s a good thing!
There is no doubt at all from anyone responding to this thread that you don’t want her taken away from you and that you love her and you want her to stay with you. I very highly doubt anyone here also believes your daughter should be taken from you given that you’ve both sought help and are taking the steps to ensure that it doesn’t happen.
It sounds to me like its not the system failing you that is pissing you off; it sounds to me like you’re worried about a possible worst case scenario and you’re well within your rights to be worried about it. Best thing you can do is cooperate and stay sober which i’m pretty sure you’re planning to do anyway.
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I don’t know where in the world you are, but in the UK the hospital staff would have a legal duty to report that kind of thing to social services. Remember that they are following a procedure, it isn’t personal, and the procedure is there to protect children from potentially risky situations.
I can totally understand that family services being involved is not the type of response you wanted, and to be worried about what could come next. But, as others have said this could be an opportunity… You don’t know how it will turn out but it is in motion now so you’ve got to go with it. Jump through whatever hoops you need to and get the support that’s on offer. I hope this is the foundation for a healthy, happy life for you and your family 
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