Day 18. I hit Tumblr again… No M…getting the pains.
Well I didnt have any M relapse… But I failed at the other.
Hey Newpath,
We’ve all been there man. It’s a hard thing to give up. What have you been doing when these cravings to look at tumblr come? Are you bored? Mad? Sad? What emotion is happening within you prior to the compulsion to engage in lustful thought?
Hope you’re staying strong!
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Hi fellas, just began my journey properly with the help of the sober time app and using this forum to get some support.
Been on board with the no porn/fap thing for a few years now but never really kept track of how I’d go because I found it quite easy to stop it all when I was in a relationship. We broke up Nov '17 and oh well, things happen and you find ways to sook about and just get back onto the dopamine grind. I’ll stop for like a week, relapse hard and not do anything about it for weeks even though I know it isn’t good for me and repeat, repeat, repeat…
Thought maybe actually keeping track might be beneficial especially reading this thread.
I want to conquer this while being single and actually feel like I don’t need that special someone to make me stop. I want this to be my thing to get in control of.
Day 1 complete. I hope you all stay strong and God bless. We’re all gonna make it bros 
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Someone please help… It was day 4 today before I relapsed twice… Please tell me how to deal with relapses
You’ve got learn from them man. Keep trying different things until something sticks. One of the pieces of advice I got in the forum is to self identify as someone who doesn’t look at porn or masterbate. I’ve made the decision that’s no longer who I am and it seems to make fighting the cravings a little easier.
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When home alone bored… I just went to take a look. Not too mention I have had any M for about almost 20 days. Wife can give me any at the moment… (
)… I went and looked again and I was on the cam sites. I didn’t do any M… I need to not be by a computer when I’m home alone.
Boredom is a difficult thing. Unscheduled free time is definitely when I need to be most vigilant. Maybe try to think of an activity that takes your mind out of the equation or puts it to use solving a problem. Play music, go to the gym, do something artistic or creative, read, learn a language, or leave the house and take a walk. Sometimes it doesn’t take much to reset our intentions for the day. Is there anything in your life that you can reliably bring you peace?
For me, I like to draw or work on a project with my hands. I’ve had to give up things like video games and cable TV. There’s just too much idle time and temptation. Besides, sex is a huge marketing tool and advertisers use it to sell their products.
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For me early in my recovery any free time scheduled or not I had to have something positive planned to do, I wrote things on the fridge I could do that way I didn’t have to think of them at that time.
Relapses can either crush or strengthen us it’s our choice. Be determined to learn from it then use that knowledge to help keep it from happening again.
Welp… I hit a full 20 days with no M. Although I have been watching the past couple of days.
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I had found that on my way home from work or anywhere and I was coming home to an empty house, I would be planning in my head what I’m going to search and start to get that feeling rising up in my chest. Being home alone with “nothing” to do is a dangerous place for me.
What helped me turn that around was a phone list. A list of people from my group or otherwise that I call when I’m headed home. I keep it in the favorites section of my contacts and just dial down the line until I connect with someone.
It gives accountability and keeps me out of isolation which the addict thrives on.
Boredom is a luxury that I cannot afford.
There is always something healthy I can do:
Clean up, bike ride, call a friend, walk the dogs, pet the cats, work on a project, organize the shed, go through documents, read a book, watch an episode of a non sexual tv show, watch a healthy movie, make food, write a gratitude list, go to a meeting, meet a friend for coffee, build something, paint something, call my mom (that will eat up some time), call my sponsor, fix something…
I am never bored because this life offers waaaaaaay too much to be bored.
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Today was a productive day. I may have hit a fault with the Porn… But today is day 21…with no M!!! Don’t know if that’s good or bad being that it’s not the full package but hey. On day at a time.
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My addiction to ampfetamin walked hand in hand with my porn addiction, year afther year afther year, in front of the computer, shootin huge amonge of speed into my veins,
I hated myself for years, felt like a dirty pig
And had no love or respect for myself,
Now i have 3 years clean, bouth from speed and porn, and my new life is amazing♥️♥️♥️
I finaly love myself, has gained a new respect for myself and can look into the mirror and smile.
Keep up the good work, and keep your eyes on God, cause he will give you all the strenght you need in the struggle…
And dont give up, remember if you should stumble, thats NOT the end, only a moment that pass, keep fighting, rise up again,
Best of luck, from Morten
And God bless you)
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Welp I now have the embarrassment…
. My stamina is depleted… Is this apart of it to?
This is all part of it, embarrassment along with shame is something that keeps us deep in our addiction. Being able to recognize that and work through it are vital to being sober.
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I took a the ultimate step today. I felt like this was weighing on meaning to much and… M went to my wife and told her everything… 
. I just had to get it all out. The P the M… It’s has to stop the edging and all.
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That was likely the more difficult thing I’ve ever done!
Since my “day off reconning” I’ve learned it’s much easier to live in honesty. It’s probably harder than hell right now but eventually it will get better
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Haven’t been on this week. I have some what given up. The anxiety is kicking in and I’m all out.
@Newpath30 now is the time when you need to dig in with your determination. Yes things can look dark but after you make it through the darkest times things become the brightest. You can beat this you just have to decide to.
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