Check your local day care or something, put an ad in the paper; I wouldn’t ask him.
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Fuck me girl. . .it’s really bringing me down and I’m having trouble mustering up more courage to talk to my man about it. There’s so much good going on that I don’t want to be the downer.
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Congratulations Michelle!! I’m so glad to hear these news! Yay!
The roommate doesn’t sound like a person who would be mature and responsible enough with children. I wouldn’t trust that person with a gold fish. I hope you find a solution.
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Small steps. Go meet the mayor (I’ve never said that to anyone before 
). Find out the details of the job. As part of your job news to your partner, maybe bring up the childcare issue. I agree with the Donna and Olivia…roommate = no!
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@Squirt I wonder if you could ask them, maybe not the first visit, but see if they know of any child care. You could say that since the lockdown you’ve been watching them and would like to find the best care for her while you work.
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FML. . .I was sent the contract and it’s only 3 days/week, 6 hours a day at $18/hour. Financially that’s not even worth it for me. I contacted the office and expressed my concern. I would be guaranteed 35 hours per week after the current administration retires in February next year. Today’s meeting is on hold and she is contacting council to see about a possible counteroffer etc.
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I know the thoughts aren’t true but the feelings are raw. I’m feeling like all the excitement, pride, progress and achievements have been ripped out from under me in a matter of minutes. I spoke with my 1st choice job to hear I came in 2nd and was told that my interview was great and my energy was amazing but the other person had a little bit more experience. I’m sitting here feeling so defeated and just want to numb. I know drinking won’t help anything but I’d be lying if I said I didn’t want the escape. If I can get the lil one to lay down with me to watch a movie I’m going to try and sleep some feelings away.
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Nothing is certain yet…take it easy and wait before you jump to a conclusion yet, amiga. You don’t have all the facts yet. There are still options open even if nothing changes. You could start with this, maybe even pick up another PT job of necessary, but it would still be a step in the right direction and a foot in the door. Please don’t downplay your accomplishment! It’s still a big success. 
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Just needed to get out what I was feeling but know this job is meant to be. They want to work with me and will guarantee 32 hours/week come September. I will accept the 18 hours/week starting Tuesday and continue to apply for assistance until my hours are full. Worst case scenario is I owe the government back for 4 months of assistance but I’m not even going to think about that until tax season next year. Sooooo. . .still wishing to sleep for a while then have plans for a celebratory dinner and the drive in with my lil family. OHHHHH. . .my man also doesn’t want to ask the roommate to babysit and I have reached out to my friend’s daughter to see if she would like to babysit 3 days/week. I really need to learn to breathe and relax before jumping to conclusions.
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You’re doing great, lady! Enjoy your celebration 
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YAYYYYYY. . .my friend’s daughter has agreed to babysit and now just her wage is to be negotiated. She said a pack of smokes and $20 is good. . .I told her to think about it over the weekend and we’ll talk about it Monday night when I pick her up 
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324 days and I’m struggling. Not with urges to drink or a desire to escape but struggling with some feelings about and toward the roommate. Even as I’m trying to get this out my eyes are overflowing with tears and I’m feeling foolish even coming here trying to get this out. The tension I feel when the roommate is around is becoming unbearable and despite telling myself to SUCK IT UP PRINCESS I feel like I’m failing myself. Letting this go has proven to be extremely difficult for me but it’s blatantly obvious that I’m allowing it to consume too much of my time and energy. Last night I politely asked him if he could stop wearing his shoes in the house to which he replied ok. Next thing I know the roommate is outside complaining to my man about my request. Wouldn’t it be easier to just take off his fucking shoes instead of making an issue about it and whining to my man? Just thinking about it now makes me angry. His presence makes me angry. Seeing him makes me angry. Hearing about him makes me angry. I’m sick and tired of him and I’m sick and tired of feeling like this. I’m fearful that I’m going to snap and say or do something I will later regret. Online learning starts in half an hour and if I can swing it, I’m just going to crawl back into bed
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Michelle, I think your guy has to step up and do something NOW; not later. If the tables were turned you would I’m sure. It just seems kind of disrespectful to have you living in that atmosphere and he knows it. I personally wouldn’t stay but I know you’re vested in the family… you deserve a peaceful, loving home.
My two cents, lol
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I am absolutely in love with my man and the girls but if I don’t do something I’m not loving myself. I have put in a lot of time, effort, sweat and tears to get to where I am today. I have cut ties with negative and dramatic peeps during my recovery and if I can’t control what type of people are in my home I think I need to find a new home. Not sure of timing but plan to state either I know he’s moving or I’m going to have to seriously think of doing so myself. My past is riddled with fight or flight responses and I just want and deserve peace.
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On a brighter note. . .I’m feeling pretty good about my new position and apparently I made a good 1st impression. I was so nervous yesterday I had a mini panic attack, overcome with grounding, prior to leaving for work yesterday. It has been 22 months since I had my nervous breakdown and haven’t been in the workforce. This text made me feel so much better and yet again confirmed that sobriety kicks ass. . .
Michelle just wanted to tell you that I had told council when they hired you that I would be able to tell within the first day how you would work out and I have to tell you I am very impressed and I think you are going to do very well very happy right now this office is my baby so needless to say it’s important who takes over but I am very happy
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Woah Michelle!! That is AWESOME! I think I just got goosebumps reading that. Sooooo proud of you!!
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329 days. Having a rough one today and wish I could hide from the world. Unfortunately or perhaps fortunately I have to leave for work in about 10 minutes. My man has yet to ask the roommate about moving out and this morning I told him if I have to walk away from all I love to take care of myself I will. My jump to conclusions brain is overactive and I feel on the verge of tears. Going to dive into work and not come home for lunch and perhaps take off for a drive after work. It’s probably not appropriate but the cold shoulder is my standpoint today.
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Hope all ends well with your situation but I think you keeping that distance at lunch and taking a drive for yourself is a good call. You have to take care of yourself and clear your head. Stay strong and you got this.
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Well. . .didn’t keep my distance at lunch but stated if the roommate isn’t looking for a place I am. Had a couple good bathroom cries and am low on energy. Awesome thing about today is my boss went home for the afternoon leaving me alone and to lock up. And she informed me she has booked two weeks holiday at the end of July so I will be full-time alone. It feels so good to be trusted and especially so soon. I know it’s my ego but I could use the boost. Waiting on supper and then may go for a drive to scream off the hillside. Saw this and LOVE it.
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Ooh love that quote! Stealing it.
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