these short nights are killing indeed. but there you are in a new day. ready for some nature with the dog.
I can imagine it opens up all the feelings and thoughts. for me at least this dating and intimite relationships is one of the most vulnerable and therefor triggering processes. Do you feel save talking about it, or writing about it? If you need anything finding your way in this, let us know.
Honestly I donāt feel like talking about it now, but Iām glad to hear I could do it if I wanted to.
Right now Iām on the second week of fixing the most important relationship there is, the one with myself.
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Sounds corny, know
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Iām still outside, itās sunny and not that cold, Iām sitting on a bench and take a short rest.
And all of the sudden, I got such strong cravings 
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Hello dear what has triggered the cravings when you were sitting on the bench ?
8:30 am here. Still sober!
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@RosaCanDo you can make these changes! I felt the same way at first. Winded just from climbing a flight of stairs. So far, itās been a week, day 8, and Iāve exercised in some way everyday and tried to focus on eating right. I feel flipping amazing and ashamed that I let alcohol take this feeling away from me for so long. Start where you can and make small changes until you get where you wanna be 
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Thank you for caring. Iām home now and try to take a nap.
I think it was my brain remembering the usual routineā¦ And I think also because I hadnāt eaten in 15 hours and am sleep deprived.
How are you guys holding up?
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Still going strong! All I wanted last night when I got home was a drink, especially with supperā¦ but sparkling water with lemon slices carried me through. Iāve given up on cutting carbs at the same time as cutting booze - I can start that up again in a few weeks.
Something I am picking up on now that itās been a week is that my choice to drink is really influenced by the emotions I pick up from others throughout the day, and also habit. Its habit to come home and have a drink or 2 after work, and to go to the pub on fridays. Once I break that habit, the cravings arent so bad (so far anyway). Also I would use drinking to shake off other peopleās energy - forget or numb it out. I have a lot of work to do with boundaries ahead of me. Since being a child there have different points in my life where I feel my empath tendancies were stronger. Those were likely also the times where drinking ramped upā¦ Really interesting to reflect back on now with a clear head!
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Oh thereās two things I want to share.
I think what contributed to the cravings wasā¦ I was sitting on that bench, watching the birds and my doggie being so happy.
All of the sudden there was the thought of: ok, you are on day 9, thatās cute, but who am I kidding? Iām never gonna make it anyways.
The other thing which I did out of instinct was squeezing my buttocks very hard with each step. I must have looked like having serious bowel issuesš, but it helped be a bit getting rid of the tension I was building up.
I wanted to go to the gym this evening, I havenāt been there since January, but I feel so weak. It might be still from the flu or from detoxing or a combination of both.
But I walked for two hours, better than no exercise at all.
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Still sober. Having my boyfriends two kids this weekend so i never drink when being with them so it have been quiet ease two days
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Thanks dear. Yes i am and the two last days as well. I would say if i know myself well enough the craving will hit me in a week. Thats when its normally hard for me since im not an every day drinker but once a week or once every second, but then its bing drinking thise nights.
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Ohh yes we sure get uncertain about our decision to stay sober and maybe have tried it before but then relapsed and that make our trust in ourselves very low, i know that from myself. You will get more energy by the time its always very energy consuming in the beginning
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Thanks dear
This is exactly my thinking. Iām feeling good, better, and then the thoughts comeā¦oh I can just have one, or a few, here comes the binge. Iām preparing for that.
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