We are here for you if you feel tempted.
@AnonymousD did help me so much by asking a seemingly simple question
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I relate so much to what youāve said. Iām also very sensitive to othersā emotions, on top of being an emotional person, and itās draining sometimes. Especially as a introvert. Numbing has been the objective for me.
The habit thing is so spot on. Iām reading a book by Gretchen Rubin called Better Than Before - mastering the habits of our everyday lives. The habits we build around alcohol need replacement because when we stop there is a hole there. What are we going to fill the hole with? If itās a new habit then we donāt have to think about it so much, the thinking is where the craving begins, at least for me I think.
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@RosaCanDo
Sounds like a interesting book, Iām gonna check it out.
Now Iām watching Fatal Attraction and try to get some sleep.
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Hope you get some restful sleep!
I decided to stay awake so maybe I can sleep at night, itās 5:11 pm.
Day 9 will officially end in 45 minutes.
When do you think itās gonna get easier???
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Thank you very much 
that im very happy for
When i was sober for 40 days. I thought it was beginning to get easier around three weeks. Though i had a relapse after the 40 days so i guess it goes up and down
Iām thinking that if we get some reading and tools and start practicing them it might start to feel easier. Sometimes it really is hard, and maybe will keep coming in waves.
Well itās happened - the cravings and crying over the grief. Itās this damn beautiful day and the prospect of grilling out later. We just bought our supplies and hubby picks up a six pack for while heās grilling. I feel the anxiety on the way home and as we are unloading I just get really irritable and of course project it on to other things, oh Iām just hungry, or, I canāt believe she expects me to travel to attend her baby shower (random shit that is happening). Then I realize that, no dammit Iām upset because it will be the first bbq sober and I feel deprived, angry, and nostalgic, all the feels. Wiped my tears and am eating lunch and thinkingā¦
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I get a lot out of my prior words being shown to me at the right time, so hereās one for you from your story;
āI canāt, I do not WANT to live my life this way anymore.ā
Iām just fresh back but have started writing in the morning to re-read when Iām feeling crappy or tempted.
This might be your first real temptation and I get it; but you will feel really great when you move on from it. 
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Let your tears out, itās so hard, I know
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Thank you! That is exactly it right there. What I needed.
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And if I ever needed confirmation that this was the right decision to change, I certainly got it today. Crying over the damn thing for like an hour. Super emotional response and serious mind racing.
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Strong rebound! And insight. Hope the emotions will slow down so you can enjoy the family grill still
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I am right where you are. Today, I have no patience for anything. Last night we had friends over and the wife is pregnant. She kept saying how after the baby comes we are going to have a wine and cheese board night. I havenāt told her yet about my problems with alcohol and the thought of the āfunā I would miss really got me down. Try to remember why you are stopping. What your life looked like a week ago that prompted you to make a change
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Who knows. Once someone explained to me about grief from losing a loved one and I think their explanation fits here.
Imagine a box. Thereās a certain button on the inside of the box and a huge ball bouncing around inside the box. When we first stop drinking, that ball keeps hitting the button over and over again. As we get along our journey, the ball starts to get smaller so it hits the button less frequently. As our counters rack up for sober days, the ball gets tr a smaller and smaller, hitting the button less and less. But when it does hit, that craving is no less intense than at first.
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Hi all! I hope you all are doing well. much love and thoughts to all of you.
Those who are reading the book, why donāt we start Tuesday? I think everyone who responded to me will have it by then. Iām ready to start reading!
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Quick check in. Long work day, then dinner and cleanup. Outlander started and sleep very soon.
Hope everyone is hanging in and keeping strong. 
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Hey all. Day 3 of the course got really heavy this afternoon and I was overcome by emotions. Not just mine, but also those of other people in the room. My boundaries werent strong enough for the heaviness today. I slipped tonight - had a pint. And I feel super guilty, but also not at the same timeā¦ if that makes sense. I had it, didnt want anymore and stopped. However, I know thatās playing with fire because of my tendency to binge when emotions are high. Tomorrow is a new day and Iāve learned from this. Will continue moving forward!
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Good morning ladies!
@SoulSearcher
Thanks for the picture of the ball and the box. Iāll think about it!
Ah and when it comes to the wine and cheese partyā¦ You could tell people you became overly sensitive to histaminesš.
Yeah Iām ready for the book when @Sunsw686 gets her copy on Tuesday.
Thanks for your honesty. I really think if you stick with one drink, that thatās not something to be ashamed of.
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