Hey Paul
Welcome to the community.
Are you just trying with sheer willpower or are you doing anything else to help you not pick up?
We are not able to battle addiction by ourselves. We need support and need to plan out our course of attack.
You could do the following if you haven’t already tried… or maybe try again and with being active here you may get better results
- meetings (in person and / or on line)
- look for a sponsor at one of the in person meetings
- possibly seek out therapy
- change up your routines (i know every evening i would really need that bottle next to me so i started walking in the evenings). I also took different routes home so I would not pass the liquor store.
- stop socializing where triggers are present (at least till you feel strong enough)
- stay super active here on this site – this community has been everything for my recover.
Remember - in addiction we can not moderate our consumption. It is all or nothing and now we have to work on re-wiring our brain. Life is awesome without alcohol and drugs. You can have a fantastic time just being you.
a few threads i find super helpful
Checking in daily to maintain focus #58
and
Daily Gratitude, The Air Of Recovery #5
Hope to see you around