-
Went whitewater rafting with my visiting-from-out-of-town mom
-
Went to Mt. Hood with the same mom
-
Went to a waterfront meeting when I got back downtown
Busy, exhausting, sun-drenched day (wait…did I mention I did all of that immediately after working a graveyard shift? ).
-Did a few hours of yardwork
-Took the kids to the lake, again
-Visited with a fellow sober friend
-Told one of my daughters that I stopped drinking 3 months ago. She was surprised. She’s 15. Part of me is happy she didn’t notice… (maybe I hid it well?). Part of me wished she had noticed a positive change in me, and could understand what caused it. Either way, with me telling her, I’ve put more pressure on myself to keep going and continue setting a good example.
Colouring - it’s been such an incredible therapy to me. I started a course week or so ago to continue to build my skills and craft. I absolutely am excited over it.
If I could walk - the gym would be my GO TO!! 100%
Loungin’. Twas roughly 101°+ today. Fluids, fluids, fluids!
Scrolling here. Continuously running out of s to give. Resting as much as possible
Scrolling, being here. I don’t feel very happy this am. I am probably gping listen to my new book more today. So far what I have listened to - was awesome.
I just found out that this dude I knew, who lived in the room I circled (that’s the view from my open door to his room), was found in a hotel room, this weekend: dead from an overdose. I had just talked to him Fri or Sat.
That makes 6 people I’ve known who’ve died from addiction since I’ve been in recovery. In less than a year and a half.
That said:
- I’m takin’ my behind to some meetings
- Doin’ Step work
- Learning from his passing
- Telling myself, “I love you”
- Telling others, “I love you”
- Staying in Gratitude
This disease is real (it wants to separate and KILL each one of us) and the struggle is real.
If you’re hurting or struggling, please reach out to someone.
And be kind to yourself.
Sorry for the loss that has affected you so deeply. Although alcohol my DOC I know drugs now a days are so much more deadly than 20 years ago. Take care of you my friend.
It affects me when anyone dies from addiction, whether it’s drugs or alcohol. It’s sad, especially when someone who had recovery dies. Thanks, though.
Things i want to do today for my recovery:
Go to the library and send out an application
Do some yoga / stretching
Do laundry
Clean for 30 mins
Work on my embroidery project
Cook dinner
Work until 3pm
Hours scenic drive home
Power nap
Arm day at the gym
Wind down walk along tbe coast
Catch up on a few shows,
Presumed innocent
Mayor of Kingstown
Criminal minds
Oh and plenty of food
Morning. I got up at 4am. It’s close to 5:30am now. I did some bible study. On to Psalm 9.
I am going to colour today, tomorrow I release new colouring books I have designed on my website. Super thrilled.
My daughters and I found a cool series called Snake Boss on Stack TV. Super fun to watch! Alone starts today [new series] super happy to watch it.
My daughter and I may go out training my service dog today. I don’t get out much - fatigue and post sepsis is freaking brutal.
I feel like such a burden. We have a stair lift because our apartment doesn’t have elevators. So everything has to be brought down 22 stairs. I hate that for them.
I feel shame and guilt at times for being so depended. Anyways yes we are going out today. Probably to the mall to sharpen and do some drill service dog training. Maybe get them some breakfast and enjoy spending time with each other.
- BJJ classes
- Visit my son
- My regular Thursday night meeting
☆ I am on here reading and responding.
☆ Ate a nice breakfast.
☆ Gardening.
☆ Conscious breathing throughout the day.
☆ Make a banana cream pie.
☆ Maybe a warm soak later.
☆ Maybe some yin in bed.
☆ No pressure if soak and yin don’t happen.
-
Go spread some hope to the mentees who are in the recovery program from which I graduated
-
AA meeting
-
NA or HA meeting
-
Step work
Already had a slower morning for myself after a busy week.
Working from home this afternoon after a week of intense face-to-face meetings. Less stimulation for this easily sensory overloaded human! I think I drank a lot to numb my senses and my feelings. No more.
Catching up on the week’s other paperwork (pay bills online, etc) and a bit of housework tonight, and packing to leave for an overnight camping trip. No more hungover morning scrambles!
Reading and posting here tonight, reading a chapter of Thich Nhat Hanh, and lights out earlier for the dog girl and I.
House chores.
Posting here, and trying to support some folks in their struggles.
Preparing for a job interview next Wednesday for a position that would be a considerable step up in complexity in my line of work. As well as it will confront me with people (managers and colleagues) I haven’t seen and spoken to for over ten years, from a time I fucked up my job (which could have had some bad consequences) and my own education. When I was in my worst period of addiction without realizing it. It will be something. Whatever happens it will be good for me and my recovery.
My plans for today as a day 4 have been just to get through this day. Still sober, although I have still terrible cravings.