Aren’t you the dude who thought drinking vodka wasn’t a reset? Keep coming back bro, it gets better when we learn to live without the obsession and compulsion to drink. Until then maybe just listen and learn.
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I have done a couple of schmoozy work dos sober. I agree I wouldn’t go into the reasons I’m not drinking… But by that logic I don’t need to make any up either. I just say I’m not drinking tonight thanks or I don’t drink. Never had any raised eyebrows as a result. Maybe I’ve just been lucky 🤷
The point is that we don’t need to explain the reasons we don’t drink to anyone. Most people don’t care, as long as you’re not stopping them doing their thing. That’s our alcoholic brain making us worry about this stuff!
Sometimes people will be annoying about us not drinking and ask more questions. But lots people are annoying about lots of things 
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I can totally relate, I’ve always used alcohol to try and ease my anxiety and deal with insecurity in social situations. But it always backfired and made anxiety worse and I always worried I had made an ass of myself after drinking. I don’t want to be that person anymore. I want to find better ways of coping and hopefully build some confidence so I don’t need a crutch anymore. Im going to keep reaching out when I struggle and you do the same!! 
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Haha oh goodness the amount of CRINGE things I did while drunk… I cannot believe I thought it made me more fun to be around 
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I think the most important thing for me right now is to stay sober and safe. Maybe the courage to talk more about it will come later. Thanks for the reply!
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It could be argued the other way around too, to say that making excuses and fabricating the “no thanks I don’t want a drink because,” excuse is the wrong way about dealing with the members request for advice is out right wrong and should be done “your way as it’s right” is just as unhelpful.
Do you know what is wrong? Singling out members in such a manner that I see as close to bullying,by more than one member on here, cut this crap out in a public place where members can see it, if you can’t accept that people have different views don’t comment. Simply send an inbox message to the person and deal with it off the post, I’m so close to flagging this up
Or they could use the search bar and peruse the many threads about it already.
I am a sober bully, I make no apologies.
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Yes, I am just in the camp that says having a sort of tried and true response is a good thing to be able to pull out should the situation arise.
You know how drunk people are, they can be pushy or want to carry on with a point or tell you about the time they stopped for awhile, yada yada. Guess what? Now you are talking about the ONE thing you don’t want to, often in front of people who you’d rather not know you had a problem.
It is assumed by the original question that somebody is prodding, or at least curious. No, I don’t think you should go around telling white lies to everyone or indefinitely, but you have the right to set the timeline and conditions. Using some line or even a joke “No, I’m good, I’m trying to loose this belly” has worked for me. In a few months I’ll transition to “Actually I stopped drinking beer to loose weight and now I just feel better so I’m not drinking now”… until nobody really cares. The point is to avoid the shame of being an addict to those (for your own reasons) you would rather not know or want to discuss with.
There is an abruptness to this process that will naturally create curiosity. In my case, I can say “No, I don’t drink” but with the alphas in my circle (business, etc) you can BET someone will say “Bullshit! You were drunk with us 6 weeks ago!” Again, on the one topic I do not want to discuss. Will they drop it? Or course. Still uncomfortable.
People also may not be taking into consideration how easy it is to relapse in those situations, or never get thier sobriety off the ground. It’s MUCH easier to just have the beer ordered for you than to speak up and say no. If you need a little crutch in that moment, I am certainly not going to look down from Mt. Sobriety and say “But…but…just be sober and proud! None of their business!”. That, to me, is irresponsible.
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No not @Jante76 I just hit reply, just really upsets me when members argue with each other, I mean we’re all here for support, I don’t like it when they go against each other 
Uncomfortable to them or you?
Are they the ones trying to get and stay sober?
Keeping it simple is, in my experience, the best way.
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No I didn’t check which reply button I hit because I got upset, @Jante76 sorry wasn’t aimed at you
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Fair enough if you’ve had that experience. In the business and social situations I’ve been in it hasn’t played out like that. I was definitely worried it would, but it never has. I can only speak to my experience and I assume others here are doing the same. Edit: I don’t think that’s irresponsible.
I’ve certainly always found it helpful to hear what others with longer sober time than me had to say. And when I asked a similar question to this one a few months back I got similar responses to the one I gave, and it helped me so just trying to pay it forward 
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Oh, hell yes. Good call back! 
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Fantastic. YMMV
“I’m a recovering alcoholic” Works very well and shuts it down fairly quickly
Not that I put myself in a drinking situation that often.
Pretty good saying in AA.
"If you go into the barbers enough times, eventually you’ll get a haircut’’
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This is the correct response
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I knew this would happen this week, this is why I pay attention to astro. Moon is emotions, mercury is communication:
Mercury, Moon, Jupiter, and Venus Rx in Scorpio tonight and I am ready to block everyone, haha. 
Remember people are sensitive under a Scorpio Stellium’s influence. Be mindful of what you say and don’t take anything personally.
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@anon44659383, you most definitely are my voice of reason lately, thanks for keeping me in check 
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This can work for some but not all people.
If you’re a teacher, police officer, doctor, etc
“Yeah, Dr. Smith was over yesterday for the game and didnt have his usual whiskey coke… I asked him why and he asked me if I’d ever woken up with blood on you not knowing how it got there? 
. I did not know he had a drinking problem and couldn’t control his behavior in the past.” Many of us have no desire to go there.
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