When in the fuck does it get easier!! Everyone always has all this bs to spew bout, “never felt better”, “things are just so much better sonce ive been sober” fuckin when though! I know I’m still new to this, but its just literally harder every day! Smokin marij never made me sad, food tasted better, it was easier to have fun with my kids, so much more patience and not lettin little shit make me crumble!!! Ugggghhhh my soul is already so fuckin tired after my 50 lifetimes in my 33 short yrs!!! When the fuck does it get easier cause I’m fuckin tired of surving every fuckin day! Why cant I just be happy, or let happy find me or however you choose to look at it! And the saddest part is even when I’m bawlin I’m searchin for a positive but NOTHIN ever feels better!!! 😵💫😵💫😵💫
Honestly… in the beginning, it was HARD. I hadn’t developed the healthy coping skills yet to help me manage all my stress and emotions and triggers. It started getting better once I was able to manage these stressor, emotions, and triggers. It’s one thing to just remove drugs and alcohol from our lives, but that needs to be replaced with something healthy and positive. I really had to work hard to change my thinking. Honestly recovery felt like alot of effin work in the very beginning and I was exhausted every single day. But as long as u don’t pick up u have a chance to make that change and for things to get better. I know it sucks. It’s very discouraging when life is like this when we 1st get clean. My biggest suggestion would be to try other ways to cope with what’s frustrating u. I like meditation, exercise, deep breathing, self care, and new hobbies. I have a morning routine that really helps me also to set my day up right. I feel ur pain and it does get easier. But we need to work on our recoveries so that we build a life that makes it easier not to use
Definitely hard in the beginning and yes sobriety has given me my life back.
Honestly, it sounds like you have some other things to address along with sobriety. Have you spoke with a counselor or therapist about what is making you so unhappy? It sounds like addiction is just a symptom of other things.
I’m definitely tryin new things and doin alot of readin and tryin meditations. It just all feels like its for nothin I guess. I’ve just had to survive all my life and this just feels like somethin else I have to survive to just live and thats what’s killin me the most. I absolutely have no copin skills outside of smokin a bowl to even just calm my mind for 5 seconds to process. It’s so sad and discouragin to know that I literally cannot put thw files in the right order before I react. Today im just ahhhhh and nothin feels good, or right and boredom is KILLIN me. Im crawlin out of my skin. I read somewhere that peace feels like boredom to people who’ve lived lives of nothin but chaos. But idfk how to move past bein bored, its killed me all my life and I just ugh idk
No I haven’t had insurance for the longest time and just recently got it back. Im sure there are tons of reasons contributing to it. My life is not a pretty story. Not as bad as most which is probably why I think my problems arent shit because someone always has it way worse and I should just suck it up
1 year and 10 months and I still want to get drunk and high, Am I happy everyday?.. definitely not but I am at peace.Eventually the cravings go and the obsessing over what you want all the time will fade. Takes time like most things and a little bit of work on yourself but don’t go searching for happiness or you’ll live a long miserable life.
Did I drink or use drugs today?.. No and just for today I am truly grateful.
Never thought I would say that.
So what are the negatives to using? Why did you choose to quit?
It sounds like you’re still romanticising the drug, maybe focus on the negatives it brings and the reasons why you quit. Also what positives does quitting bring to your mental and physical health? Maybe write them all down the reflect on them… and when you feel it’s super hard, use those lists as a reminder as to why you’ve quit. It makes recovery alot harder if you focus on the ‘positives’ of using.
No way. You can’t compare your problems to others. They are yours!
I stayed an alcoholic way longer than I needed to with the mentality of “well, I’m not as bad as them”.
I guarantee if you find someone to talk with who you can establish a trust with, you will absolutely benefit.
Many of us use substances as a way to numb the problems or make them seem less stressful, but the reality is, you have to deal with those things if you ever expect to be sober. It’s not easy, in fact it’s very hard and takes work.
There is a big difference between sober and just not using. Sober is learning to live your life and develop skills to get you through hard times, not using or not drinking or whatever, is just that, just not doing the thing and just struggling through life always wanting to use or drink. It does get better, and it’s worth every bit of effort you put into it.
I’ll suggest a meeting of AA, it worked wonders for me. Here are a couple of extensive lists of things people have used to get and stay sober.
Blessings on your house as you begin your journey.
Don’t suck it up, let it out. There will always be someone better off and worse off than you are but that doesn’t make your struggle any less valid. The feels hit me hard in early sobriety. I drank a lot of alcohol to numb a lot of feelings. Once you let what you are smoking to cover out into the light the gremlins scatter. Those negative feelings hate the light.
This! Im really appreciative of all your honest advice, I’m tryin to learn its ok to feel. Its never been ok for me to feel ANYTHIN EVER, even as a child. I had to be the parent and if I chose to feel anythin or say anythin I waa bein dramatic or havin a pity party its really hindered me in every aspect of life. Wow… I absolutely have to find a therapist
I get it, emotions are new to me too. It does get easier. Honestly, just trying to sit with and name what I was feeling was helpful for me in the beginning. When you feel overwhelmed ask yourself if it’s rage, sadness, apathy, frustration etc. that you are feeling. Once you can put a name to it it gets more manageable and you make space to feel the good ones. Keep going, you’re doing great!
Every situation is different, for me it was about a year.
It was more to do with the changes in my life that not being drunk allowed me to make… Joining clubs and meeting people, before I would have been at home isolated.
When I first got sober I was offered support from a charity that worked with families affected by drug and alcohol abuse. I was encouraged by my counsellor to admit to them that I was struggling with basic parenting skills, most likely because my parents hadn’t really had the skills either. I too had found it so much easier to be tolerant and patient with my kids with a drink or several in me. My husband had just died and he had been the more responsible parent between the two of us.
Something you said about being the parent when you were a child resonated with me. I think sometimes we have to learn how to have fun again if we have had a difficult childhood, and may well need to be shown how because it’s something we didn’t learn as kids.
When we take our go-to coping mechanism away we have to build in new methods of coping and ultimately thriving, and you may well need help with that just as I did.
Working a program so you have other recovering addicts who can listen to you and what you are going through and give you some suggestions. Get a sponsor so they can guide you through recovery and give you suggestions. Work the steps so you can gain freedom from the disease of addiction. Read the NA literature because there you can usually find a solution for your problem.
Nobody is happy all the time but the important thing is you are much more at peace…that’s where I need to get:)
Be at peace right now… whatever you think you’re searching for STOP IT and just go with the flow. Have a lovely day.