I keep pressing the reset button. I don’t want to drink anymore. I don’t even really enjoy it. I’ve stopped last year for almost a year.. Why do I keep caving at the moment? Where’s the willpower I had then? What is wrong with me?
Welcome Hopeful.
I’m glad you found us.
It takes much more than just willpower to beat addiction. You might have an addiction to alcohol but that doesn’t mean there’s anything wrong with you. None of us started drinking to become alcoholics or addicts. But it happens. The best thing I did to stop drinking is get support, keep an open mind, and listen to others that have been through recovery.
This is a great app for support. Tons of information for you. Have a good read around. Join in when you’re comfortable.
Like Eric already has mentioned there is nothing wrong with you.
I had a relapse after 5 years of sober time, it happens and I hope it never happens again. It was hard work to get back on track. Same as you. But the good part was I knew what to do. What where the things you did to mantain your sober year back then? Are you doing that now? Can you add something? Like AA ore online meetings for example?
Here is a thread you may find useful too:
Keep coming here reguarly, it helps to be here much!
as stated it takes more than willpower maybe try a meeting might help wish you well
As already stated willpower doesn’t cut the mustard, you always need support from fellow alcoholics.I
They are emphatic as aposed to sympathetic.
They all, to some degree or another know damn well what your going through, but all of them know how hard is withdrawal of your Doc, and how easy it is to relapse.
But you do need some willpower, or call it need or fundamental desire to get sober, without that you are fighting a loosing battle, and a daily battle it is, trust me on this point.
This Forum can always be your anchor point, somewhere to retreat to, where forumites can give you encouragement, support and advice, but above all love.
What you require for long term sobriety (21 years for me) is a program of recovery.
When I got sober in 2004 AA was the only game in town in the UK, and it’s kept me sober this long.
I don’t believe in a god but Gods (Pagn especially Norse) so initially the god bothering aspects if AA was not for me, but as my Sponsor said to me “fake it till you make it”.
These days as an old timer I have found that AA is not so monotheistic, but it’s still there.
So, AA isn’t for everyone even if we interpret God as, Good Orderly Directon or Group Of Drunks.
But even so, there are other flavours of recovery program, try some and go with what resonates with you.
So, as I’ve always said, both inside and outside this Forum is:
- You need a program of Recovery.
- You need a Sponsor to guide you
through that program. - Need to go to local F2F
meetings, to build up a LOCAL
support network.
Please remember that this is YOUR recovery and you need to do it by and for YOURSELF, but having said that you are still going to need help.
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