Yeah lol. I’m already at work, going to order a breakfast sandwich. Is this normal? Should I talk to my sponsor about this? I never know when to txt him
Thank you Conor! 
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Haven’t done drugs but I’m an insomniac. Sometimes thinking goes on overdrive altho nothing bad has happened. All kinds of activity, positive including, can get us wound up. So on these basis I wouldn’t worry too much. Do you do any relaxing exercises before going to bed?
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Day 134- no smoking
Day 36- No PMO
Everything is going great, ready to go workout like a boss and after that a few games of ping-pong.
Hope you guys are doing well!
A little quote that helped me a lot in my time of struggle:
“Addicts prefer a lifetime of misery over a few weeks of hell”
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Usually just read a sober book and chill. But I’ve been sleeping great for the last 4 months no issues at all, so just found it kind of weird.
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Coincidentally, day 987 today. 987 was also the hull number of the last ship I served on.
Congratulations Scott. That’s awesome - nearly 4 digits. In the past I would have said that was cause for celebration and have a drink. Every day is an excuse - “Scott’s sobriety day count is the same as the hull number of the last ship he served on! You coming?”
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Checking in Sober, Day 335. Haven’t checked in for a few days, had a rough weekend. My adult brother, who is both autistic and learning disabled, is having a manic episode. I’m living with him and my mother while I work on my recovery, and that is being tested right now. We’re all very stressed and not getting any sleep as he is talking non-stop, trying to do things only to leave a giant mess in his wake, and he has broke or lost a number of items (including 3 packages that were presents I bought). You can’t leave him unsupervised even for a moment and this has been round the clock for several days now. Frustration is high and tempers are short, but I’m still sober and going going to meetings. Just have to ride out the duration of his episode, hopefully that will be soon.
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Heading in to day 67 later today.
Feeling a bit anxious for a dental procedure this coming weekend. I have a wisdom tooth that’s ankylosed (it’s fused to jaw bone; under surface of gums but peeking out a point) and it’s near a major nerve so my dentist warned me of the risk of facial paralysis. That freaks me out. A different dentist is coming to do it in my regular office on Saturday. I’ll be IV sedated. I know it’s silly to worry and people have major surgeries but I admit I’m still nervous. I keep thinking how brave my little guy was for his eye surgery. Not sure if they’ll take my other wisdom teeth while I’m out, and I’ve never met the doctor doing it, nor even had a consult about it, but I’m sure he knows what he’s doing! I hope!! 
it’s not causing me problems but apparently could one day
Have a great day folks.
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Early check in this sunny Monday morning.
Feeling happy, healthy and strong. Have a great day everyone. God bless you all.
&
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Day 178 clean and sober today. So it was another uncomfortable day yesterday in regards to my relationship with Faith. As you all know or I think you do, Faith has DID which is the modern diagnosis for multiple personality disorder. I wasn’t sure really what to do so I wrote a message to the alter (another personality) and hopefully it will have a positive outcome. So since we’re all family here I wanted to share what I wrote and maybe get some feedback on if it made sense and if I was clear and kind. Thank you so much everyone I love you guys here it is:
Dear Sage, I know you have been fronting a lot lately and I know it’s something you can’t control. I’m not upset at all with you or anyone in the system at all I just needed a little time to wrap my head around what’s happening. I love Faith dearly and I care about everyone in the system and want to be able to give the support that each person needs. I got my feelings hurt but I’m ok now and thought it would be best to ask you what the best way I can support you while you’re fronting. I don’t want the relationship to end, I want to stay but I need to know better ways for us to communicate so I can understand what’s happening so I don’t overthink things and so I won’t make it difficult for you or the system. I really care deeply about everyone and I’m head over heals in love with Faith. If there’s anything you could suggest that would allow me to be a better friend or support for you please let me know. I know things have been really tough for all of you lately and I’m here to love and support you guys. I’ll be busy today getting things ready for my upcoming surgery but will be available to talk if you want. I hope you have a great day!
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Sorry you’re feeling anxious and overwhelmed. What you are feeling is normal, expected and right on time. Your use of alcohol possibly was a means of avoidance/escape. You don’t have that now. Stopping alcohol, the fog is lifting and what was always there now can be seen again. The good news is that you can and WILL get through this. The fact that you are aware of and concerned about substituting one behavior for another is a good sign. So is the fact that you are sharing here.
Yes, you will need to deal with these things (as they say, “The only way out is through”) but you don’t have to deal with them all at once! Right now, just keep things simple: Don’t drink and go to meetings! The fog will continue to lift for awhile. And the AA Steps will help you deal with fixing things. Step 4 will help you identify and understand what is broken inside and 5-9 will help you to heal. Until then, you have everyone here to lend an ear and offer advice and support.
Have a good workout at the gym and keep sharing here with your progress!
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Day 408… long weekend was good, i struggled a little one morning but that happens from time to time. We put up Chrismas stuff last night and now i just have to decorate outside a little.
We only have to do this ODAAT… it took us a long time to dig out holes and it takes a while to climb out of them and fill them in. No matter how bad the day seems if you stay sober its a good fucking day.
@apes2020 I’m so glad to see you back, I’m pulling for you.
@anon60334405. When that happens to me i always tell myself as long as I’m laying in bed in resting and then i think about how good the bed, blankets, and pillow feel. It might be worth a shot.
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Yay! You are off of quarantine!! At least you had all that school work to occupy you! Im going a little cookoo ovee here. Proud of you for sticking it out.
I have family in Papillion, Nebraska. Well my daughters uncle and cousins. Her uncle is a Dr. in the ER. It is definitely a hot spot. He cant get time off work. Even when he had covid symptoms a few weeks back… I couldnt believe he was still working. My thoughts are with you!
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Congratulations April you’re kicking ass!!!
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Today is luckily a therapy day. I am feeling overwhelmed, I am 3 weeks without nicotine/cigarettes AND 2 days without porn or masturbating. My thoughts are jumbled. My Parts are active. I hope I can stay present. I need to go for a walk…perhaps yoga.
I want to run and jump off of a cliff. Luckily I am exceedingly out of shape and cannot run far without stopping. One moment at a time.
The voices are screaming at me. It was nice when they were silent…or at least not screaming mean things. A healing shower may help.
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Checking in on hour 17. Looking forward to completing day one.
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Hi Rob/sobriety twin,
I’m not an expert in these things however just a couple of thoughts. Can you ask Sage to relax and give you more Faith time? Reassure her that she does not have to be in control the whole time. Perhaps the best person to ask Sage to let go is Faith?
DID is complex and you really need to involve a trusted specialist in this rather than try to tackle it by yourself. Sounds like if Faith is fronting it is great. If I understand correctly the other personalities sometime push to the front to hide trauma. I’m not sure that anyone has the answers yet, but take advice from a professional And don’t let people with quack remedies take advantage of you. 
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