I have never scuba dived and imagine its an amazing experience. Enjoy your trip!
@C_8 I focus on this daily one (which as u say, is a task to keep up with), and just randomly check the others. Maybe I should start checking another slower thread more regularly.
@MrsOdh I know she has had her part to play, but moving from place to place like that must have a toll. It is easy for me to feel sympathy when I am not dealing with the daily troubles, tho.
@RosaCanDo Congratulations! 
@anon60334405 Does goofing mean enjoying a new thing in US? For me a goof is a mistake or goofy is silly. Glad ur tattoo is NOT a goof and u love it.
@Charlie_C Spooky!
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Huge immense enormous congrats on 150 glorious days of sobriety @RosaCanDo! All your hard work is paying of Rosa. Hugs and love.
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itās the last place we go and the first place that works. Like you I tried everything sane so eventually I had to try something crazy. I still didnāt stay sober though until I got a sponsor and started to work the steps.
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Day 229
Got my access back to TS yesterday, those who didnāt know i broke my old phone so I locked myself out of everything, 0 out of 5 stars do not recommend, itās a nightmare to get back in, took a week of fighting with google and required everything except a DNA sample and my first born.
However, I was asked by the alumni coordinator of my treatment center to share my story, tonight in a zoom meeting, to say Iām kinda nervous is a understatement, but I feel honored that people want to hear my story.
I am gathering the courage to share it on TS as well, maybe this will be what it takes to get me over the hump. Those of you that know me from posting or chatting or in zoom, know Iām outspoken, but thereās still parts of me that I can be uncomfortable talking about.
Wish me luck, and look forward to my novel thread here I guess
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So kind @Dolse71 thanks for being an amazing support. Hope youāve had a good Thursday. Think I read your message half asleep at 6am and need to reread again. I love checking in sober here each night. Feeling so much better. I worked late today and did a little stretching and yoga. Felt pleased I didnāt beat myself up for no major exercise I just breathed and loved. Sending the same feeling and love out to you all x
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Wow, that is some serious hard work! Congrats!!
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Iāve got to do my first 20 - 25 minute main share at the end of the month so I know how much your shitting it 
good luck 
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Good Luck! Its pretty awesome to be able to help others the way you will be doing!
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Ah so good! Iām on a Buddhism course atm called Life with Full Attention which is about bringing Buddhist practice into our life.will let you know if any good book recos come out of there. Iām also enjoying WOUNDED WOMAN which is on history of womenās treatment during their menstruation and generally about womenās bodyās 
it is so HEALING to read and think about how itās a feminist issue that I appreciate and love my body. (Whenever I struggle with something I tell myself itās a feminist issue and Iām doing it for women everywhere!) (And men who also suffer under the patriarchy!)
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I hear that is some of the best scuba diving! Enjoy and congrats on being negative!
Iām feeling different this past week. I feel more open to living in the present at home with my wife, and at work, with my colleagues (and my tasks). This differs from before when I would get distracted or think really grandiose that I had to be and do everything - and in the end I did nothing.
Iām not sure where this will go but I feel food about it. Iām also walking more regularly. An evening walk, every few days. This started last week. I like it. Audiobook. Itās peaceful.
Wish me luck friends. About to head out on my walk. 
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Checking in. Second night/last night away from home. Drove by a nice looking Mexican restaurant. My addict mind went right to the drink menu. So I grabbed a wood fired pizza instead. Now bored watching tv in the hotel. Cant wait to go home tomorrow. Stay strong, stay sober everyone
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I had a bad week last week. Friday came and I thoughtā¦ screw it im going to drink tonight because I deserve it after thisā¦ then some how I thought āwhy the hell would you jump back to the bottem of the pit when the pain your feeling is mostly growing pains from climbing out of itā
Cracked a diet coke and watched TV all night.
Woke up in a great mood.
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That pizza looks great - I hope you brought enough to share!
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I wish I could give you the last slice. Iām stuffed. Just the right amount of burnt and smokey.
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And this is why drugs will never fucking be worth it ever again guys. A year sober and this shit still sneaks up on. I ordered pizza for me and my girls. I use to get my shit from the ppl where I ordered the pizza from.i didnāt think anything of it tho, Iām a year sober and they have good food. So the guy comes to bring me my food, tells me the price and Iām like here yah goā¦he goes you have the rest of that money? Iām like money, what do you mean, heās yeah like for cassandra Iām like what? Heās like yeah you were 40 shortā¦ Iām still baffled and know for a fact I donāt owe this fucker 40 bucks, my girls are right fucking there and my blood is boiling. I didnāt want to start drama in front of my kids, Iām like yeah one minute dude so I go upstairs grab him the 40 bucks give it him and he leaves. I close the door and go into the kitchen and start balling my eyes out. Like wtf you guys come on Iām a year fucking sober, plz leave me the fuck alone. Why would u even do this over 40 bucks and in front my of my kids. Drugs fucking suck, get away from that shit as far as u fucking can.
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It does not matter if its one year away from dealers or 5 yrs away, they will still manipulate you if they know they can. Donāt let it bother you. Its not worth the energy.
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Day 66.
Its 12pm and baby hasnt visited once yet. Odd. I told it yesterday that Iām going away today for two weeks and il be back, I definetly think it understood me because I havnt seen it once today 
I leave in 3 hours so hopefully I get to have a play before then. I will be off the internet for two weeks. Digital detox while Iām away. No phone, no TV, no internet. Two weeks of stillness 
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Where are you going for this stillness?
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