Day 714
Have a nice weekend everyone 
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Congratulations on your 90 days of freedom CJ
Youāre killing it.
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Woot woot woot
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@maxwell Congratulations on your 3 days 
so proud you came straight back, I wasnt strong enough when i relapsed it lasted 2 years so I am extremely proud to see you have this strength and to be here fighting with all you have 
@Miranda Hi Miranda, the fact is your here and you havent totally given up, you have not done any real damage yet you still have a chance to decide to live the sober good life.
Can you get to meetings? Iv started to go in the evening itās my first time properly going and it really has been so good for me.
I get really lonely at night time and itās the best part of the day for me to go.
Iām not sure and cant speak for you but maybe you feeling alone being sober at the evenings when your husband drinks and this would be a good idea to go to a meeting then. Where there are people who can help face to face.
You can do this, I know you can you know you can.
In glad your still here and if this is your day1 congratulations to you, because some people never make it back. This disease kills.
Iām just glad your here that takes strength and I admire you for coming straight back to the journey before any damage can be done.
@anon53116147 huge congratulations on 60 days that is amazing so super proud of you.
@RosaCanDo congratulations on 10+months so glad you share your strength and your here.
@SassyRocks 5+ years is amazing!! Iām very gratefull when I joined here you were one of the onee who have been solid and so welcoming and good advice to others.
@Bluekoolaid so glad to see you settling in and so happy to hear your feeling good about all the changes. I think back to a few months ago and look how far you have came!! I am so proud or you.
@Cjp 90 days thatās brilliant Iām so proud to see this
@Leveller congratulations on your 5 days 
People have a party right across from me can see them smoking, drinking socialising and for a second I felt like I was missing out.
Sitting here reading your guys posts, I know Iām not alone, I dont need to be ar a party or drinking or smoking because in on a waiver journey and discovering so much spiritually about myself and the world so instead I say a small prayer for them to have a safe happy party and hope that no one will suffer with addiction like I have.
I am so happy to be part of this community, Iām so happy we all share our lives together here. I dont need more, I am happy with how my life is.
I guess accepting and surrendering that my life cant have alcohol the actuall acceptance part means I can live peacefully with the decision that I wont drink again. I am accepting this because as soon as you do it becomes a hell of alot easier, this was my experience from when I had 8 yes sober. Then something @Its_me_Stella mentioned
I couldnāt do 8 years again, not by myself especially as I dont know how I even did it then.
So I have been going to meetings and really getting to know myself deeply and spiritually and build my relationship back with God.
Thank you all today I am 303 days and itās now I feel I need to be really putting in the work fo this work, but for me to be at peace with I am a non drinker, so I can live properly and a peace with who I am.
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Helpful advice. I would add as well that sometimes there are other factors happening behind the scenes. We work hard to keep the forum running smoothly and to keep this a safe space. Moderators do not read all the threads, we rely on members to bring any inappropriate or posts that break the rules to our attention. That is the responsibility/social contract of all the members on this site and much appreciated.
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Congratulations 
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Checking in
Day 166
So I was really thrown off by a comment a cashier made to me today. I went to the $ store after work for some beverages for me and hubby. There was a man there who definitely looked a little rough, sweating profusely (like thatās even an understatement), he was obviously on drugs (I could tell from his eyes and his movements), but he also was looking for a drink. He grabbed a pop and headed to the cashier. I followed shortly behind. He asked me if I could maybe pay for his pop. Itās +31 here and itās hot so I said, āSure, no problemā. We go the cashier, he says thank u and he leaves. I pay for all our drinks and the cashier tells me that this man got someone else to buy him a lighter earlier too. And she looks up at me as if to say āWhy did u buy that pop for him? You kind of got playedā.
I was really thrown off by this honestly. I wouldāve never bought him a lighter bcuz I would never want to help someone to act out in their addiction. But itās +31 out and wether he is an addict or not, itās hot out and everyone needs something to drink (especially those who are out on the streets in this heat all day). He couldve easily stolen the drink but he asked me to buy it for him. I told her that it was literally $1 and that I could afford it. That itās not my place to judge another. We all need something to drink in this weather. She sort of nodded with her head down and then wished me a good evening. I walked home and prepared supper and really thought about what happened today. I donāt regret my decision at all to help this man. I hope she took something away from this today.
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It was a very kind gesture, buying him a drink. We all could use a little kindness and compassion at times.
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I hope more people would act as you did. 
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Dana, you helped someone, period. Thatās what we all should be doing.
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You did the right thing Dana. Not just with buying the drink for the man but also with sharing with the cashier why you did that. She may well have no idea why consideration for that man matters in that way.
Prejudice runs deep, and often subconsciously, in webs, channels, through our society. Our social and experiential lives are charged with currents of prejudice and we have to try to be aware of them, to defuse them.
Prejudice is learned, subconsciously. We learn prejudice when weāre young, not directly - or at least, seldom directly - but instead indirectly, by observing the words and actions people use with different groups of people.
Some groups get treated respectfully. As children, we notice who gets respect, and we mimic that.
Some groups get treated dismissively (as in, āwe have to tolerate them as an unavoidable group in our world, but thatās about it; we do not initiate contact with them, do anything for them, spend time with themā). People lost in addiction usually fall into this group, and homeless people do too.
What you did today was at one level a simple act of kindness. But at a deeper level it was a revolutionary act of caring and respect. Your act was an anti-prejudice act. Your act showed that man deserved to be seen, heard, and supported, in ways that were helpful.
The cashier isnāt showing prejudice out of malice; itās not her fault. She is just repeating what sheās learned from the (frankly callous and dismissive) patterns of prejudice that are absorbed from a very young age.
What you did today may have opened her eyes and got her thinking. I wouldnāt be surprised if she looks at people in a new way after this.
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You did the right thing and a kind thing!! We need more people like you who act with their heart and not overthink.
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Almost day 10! Today I went out for a drive with my mom and the kids. We stopped for lunch which I normally would have had at least 2 tall beers. I wanted one so badly but I just put my head down and stuck to water. Afterwards my mom told me she was proud of me which I canāt remember her ever saying before (our familyās not big on sharing feelings or anything 
) but all in all it felt good to stop myself! Iām still having cravings honestly. Just have to keep pushing them out of my mind. This was not a hard day but I definitely need to get more tools to fight these cravings in the near future because I feel like theyāre only going to get worse.
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@SassyRocks @Misokatsu @Piglet86 @maxwell @Mbwoman @Matt
Thank u for ur comments. I really appreciate every single one! Thatās just the thingā¦ if Iām able to help I will. If someone is legitimately hungry or thirsty (and I am in a position to help), how can I honestly be judgemental and turn someone away. I have definitely been in his shoes where I needed help from a stranger in one way or anotherā¦ and some of the looks I remember getting from others made me feel like I wasnāt even a human being. I honestly can not be that way to others. He is a human being first and not āsome junkie asking for people to buy him stuffā. Her comment just really made me cringe 
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Wow Matt. I never thought of it like that! Thank u so much for shedding some light on this! Appreciate it!
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I absolutely agree with this girl! U worded it perfectly! Sometimes the simplest of gestures can make the greatest impact 
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Beautiful post @Matt. Thank you so much for the powerful reminders of the quiet and unconscious prejudice of every day life.
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Hi everyone,
Its 2:25am and I cant sleep due to the party about 5 metres from my bedroom window.
Itās been going on for hours.
I just think at this time of night its respectful to think of others, turn the music down and close your back doors as we all have to live next to each other and respect eachother.
My me tal health goes so bad if I dont sleep and iv been trying so hard for 2 weeks to stay on track and been doing well until now.
I can feel the anxiety starting where in worrying already the knock on effect this is going to have on me.
I dont want to call the neghbourhood housing noise team, as I dont want to get them I to trouble. In kind of hoping one of the people in there flats will do ask them.
Its ridiculous, but they are young and it probably hasnt even crossed there minds.
Oh dear. Iām going to read and try to sleep through the noise.
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Oh girl this awful!!! Do u have any ear plugs or anything? My husband uses those at times bcuz heās a light sleeper. Unless u have to wake up to alarm, then that may be a problem 
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I think if I read il drop off to sleep with the book on me 
I totally understand that itās one of there 20th birthdays, and it really probably hasnt even crossed their minds, or dont realise how loud they are.
One thing I feel greatfull for is my son is 20 and I feel gratefull I isnt out doing stuff like that.
I probably put him off if Iām honest!
Il be okay I have to try not to let it get to me, that is what i can control how I react and let it effect me.
Iv brought quite a few books and Iām just going to read one I usually wake up with it in my face where iv fallen asleep.
I think the hard intense working out for 2 weeks twice a day is catching up with me too.
Gosh I remember when I used to party 2:30am was still early
Your doing so well, if been keeping up with your posts and I hope you know you really are a caring person. Your deeply put others before yourself and anytime you need me you know where I am x
Thank you for always being here x
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