@DoraV, congratulations on your 5 days. Keep moving forward one day at a time!
3 Likes
3rd evening sober 
Back home safe, will bring that head sober on my pillow tonight!
Will add further meetings on dharma recovery to my schedule as it was very helpful until now.
Today I had funny family day with good food, relaxing and laughing.
Prepared some food for office day tomorrow.
There is a little white cat sneaking around my house these days and she was already standing in my kitchen once. I just put the garbage out and she immediately cuddled to my leg and came with me up the steep wooden staircase to my front door and wanted to come in. She is so cute, big eyes, white fur with some black and brown dots aaand what an elegant movement. What is it with her? 
23 Likes
Day 64. Today is going okay. Havenāt gotten much done, but allowing myself to rest. This time change is always really hard. Iām sure itāll be tough getting up for work tomorrow. Had a decent phone call with my other sister. She means well.
21 Likes
Keep getting back up. It only has to properly stick once. What can you add to your program so that you stand a better chance of it sticking thus time?
3 Likes
Checking in on day 639. Sober mornings simply do not get old. Traveling solo is lonely but can be very peaceful and meditative. Last night I went down to the sea. After dinner I got an ice cream cone and walked along the boardwalk to watch the sun set. It was profoundly beautiful, and there were so many other people doing the same. Families with little children, young couples on a date, old married couples enjoying each otherās company in silence. Everything bathed in golds and deep reds.
Across the street was a noisy pub. People drunk and talking loudly. The crash of a shattering pint glass someone accidentally knocked over. Oblivious to the moment. I wouldāve been in that pub just as oblivious some years ago. Being sober allows me to pay better attention to the present moment.
Love to all of you.
32 Likes
Day 57.
Today was absolutely brilliant. I had a lie-in, then me and the husband went to a museum, then we went for a long walk around the city and then had a nice dinner. It was awesome! Iām not gonna lie, drinking did briefly cross my mind, but then I thought of how disastrous an otherwise lovely day could turn out to be.
Iāve ruined too many nice days by drinking, getting drunk, messy, blackout, all followed by several days of dealing with intense hangovers, anxiety, and self loathing. I donāt have to do any of that anymore. I can have a nice day, and then go to sleep and wake up the next day without feeling like a truck smashed my head in.
On a less positive note, my temporary filling by the emergency dentist last night fell off during dinner tonight. It was supposed to last up to a month. I was hoping Iād get at least a couple of weeks out of it. So, I see another dentist in my very near future.
27 Likes
I need to connect with some sober, like-minded people. I have supportive friends and family, but the majority of them are drinkers without a problem. I have also talked to my boyfriend about starting to plan things that alcohol just cannot be a part ofā¦like some physical activity type stuff. And as bad as I hate to admit it, I need to start looking for an AA group that I can actually connect with and it be helpful.
15 Likes
Hello all,
Checking in on Day 1,688 Sober.
Thanks
25 Likes
Sober groups really are a solace. I hope you can find one that suits you. Donāt give up looking. It may time time to find one, but that doesnāt mean there isnāt one.
6 Likes
Day 66. Today I took a step- made a call to a potential therapist and requested a consult. I know therapy is a good idea and Iāve gone many times in the past, but Iām still sort of dreading it.
17 Likes
Why are you dreading it?
Iāve been in therapy before but never to address the real issue which was my alcohol addiction. I only recently realized myself itās the real issue, and talking about it openly is hard to think about doing. I think Iām most nervous about not being taken seriously, if that even makes sense.
5 Likes
If they are a professional they should understand a bit. I hope they are a good fit. Just breathe and dont give up until you find that safe place to process
5 Likes
Day 22 no weed
Day 128 no alcohol
Today was restful 
19 Likes
Today I just want to cry this is unlike me, not that I want to cry bc Iāll watch stuff on you tube to deliberately shed a tear, but Iām not sad or happy and yet I feel I could cry from sadness and joyā¦ Strange that it just wonāt come out bc I donāt know what I want to cry about.
Didnāt help that Iāve only just found out that Willie Spence from American idol died in a car incident. I live in the UK so thatās not news here and most people wonāt even know who he is but I loved his voice and his presence, he was a big man with a big soul. Funny how people can be in your life for just a few moments and leave a mark on you.
So Iāll raise my empty glass and shed an invisible tear to the joy of life and the sadness of what ifs.
15 Likes
Thanks for your encouragement, I appreciate it! I work in the healthcare field so I know how finding the right fit is a big part of it. Hopefully it wonāt take too much shopping around to find.
3 Likes
I think thatās reasonable to feel. You can feel your emotions and even kind of simplify the emotions.
5 Likes
I couldnāt do it without AA. It is amazing what regular meeting with like minded people and having a sponsor will do for you. I highly encourage it. It was a game changer for me.
5 Likes
Day 5
Good evening/morning sober peeps! I wish I had something to report today. Unfortunately, I ended up napping most of the afternoon, and spent the rest of the day on YouTube triggering myself. Apparently, getting angry creates dopamine, which is bad news. Iām glad Iāll have a therapist soon.
Iāve got an appointment tomorrow morning (a follow up, I doubt theyāll find anything else wrong with me). Iām going to have a hard time sleeping since I did so much today). Anyway, just wanted to stick my head in the door and say hello. 
Take care, everyone! 
16 Likes