Day 25: no grazing
Day 745: no pills
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Just one thing: you gotta jump in. The individual mix will follow. Trust the process and let go of the total control your are trying to exert. Which is only an illusion anyway. Since Iām in Recovery Iāve been forced to trust others for a change. In choosing (group 
) therapies for example. I still hate to let go of control but every time I manage to do so beautiful stuff happens. Just jump in. The waterās fine my friend 
.
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I changed that. I get where youāre coming from. But I also want to point out that things like this was one of the reasons I left this forum last time. If weāre going to keep this up, change, rethink,reframe and be extremely careful about every word, every picture and everything we do in here. Itāll soon be an impossible place to be. We canāt please everyone and thereās always someone whoāll be offended or feel bad,no matter what we do.
I used to be a junkie as well,where I live the word is used to describe a specific kind of drug addicts not just anyone. But anyway, I changed it,I get the point.
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Thank you.
Youāre pretty much right.
Actually where I live itās used to describe a specific kind of drug addicts,it doesnāt mean just anyone.
I used to be one of them myself. Itās definitely not a place I want her to be or a person I want her to stay with. As youāre trying ti describe itās a certain lifestyle we want to distance ourselves from.
And thatās also why we came and picked her up as soon as she called.
I still have friends in active addiction,I still have my own urge to use that I Battle with still (Even If Iāve been clean for many many years)
But I wonāt,and thereās the difference between us here trying and those who donāt.
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Thank you.
Sheās back home now,We had about a 6 hours road trip to bring her home.
Hopefully sheāll get her life together this time.
With some help from us ofc. 
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Thank you, Mno.
Iām still here, abstaining and reading.
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sweet and true
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Ugh that anxious feeling in the stomach is the worstā¦ I feel you! Sorry youre going through it. Sometimes it doesnāt go away no matter what I do to alleviate it. It helps me not to overthink it then, and just ride the wave until it passes on its own.
Congrats on your sobrieties! 
Great job, friend!
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Celebrating Day 313
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I agree. I donāt like the word alcoholic, I think itās unnecessary stigmatizing. I donāt call somebody with schizophrenia a schizophrenic, or somebody with autism an autist, either.
Iām not going to use the word alcoholic to describe myself or anybody. But there are others that do and if thatās what they want, fine. I can live with that. I have to live with that.
Also this is a world wide forum, with english as lingua franca. Thereās a 100 types of english spoken as native languages around the world. And thereās also us for whom english is a second or third language. Whose english do we use here and whoās here to police it?
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@KarenKW congrats on 30 days 
@Cjp congrats on the promotionā:clap:t2:
@JazzyS thank you 
š©µ it will pass hopefully soon. 
@Dustysprungfield congrats on 3 weeks
@Just_Laura congrats on 6 months
@Saturn81 welcome congrats on 3 days
@Mira_D congrats on 30 days
1101 days no alcohol.
566 days no cocaine.
81 days no vape.
Today has been much like yesterday, and Iāve managed my fundamentals but only one other activity, which was reading one chapter of the book Iām reading.
I received my new passport today, and I do like my photo, so thatās good, and now Iāve applied to renew my drivers licence, which they will use the photo from my passport, so I will receive that soon too. My last passport and drivers licence photos were pre-Testosterone so Iāve never liked them. So now I will have ID that better reflects current me.
š©µ
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Checking in sober day 31.
I canāt wait for vacation. I need a break from life. Iām exhausted with everything. I never feel at peace. Iām not even trying for happiness. I want peace of mind. That might be harder to find. Particularly with ADHD and anxiety. But soon I can sit on the beach and watch the waves.
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Great news @CATMANCAM That must feel so right, to feel reflected in the image you have.
@KarenKW Congratulations on Day 30. Where are you off to? I love the ocean.
Checking in on Day 43. Really tired today. Been trying my hardest in all my roles and that has taken it out of me, think I managed it though. My family are happy and got a lot done at work. I am not very good and the switch required between roles, so having the kids home while I am working is tough. My son would live in his room (which isnāt good), and my daughter seems to rely on me for entertainment. I feel sad for kids today as they just donāt play out like we used to. I guess the parents are too busy. I have quite bad Mum guilt today, but also so envious of friends with the little ones. I miss those days.
Anyway, have waffled on there. I needed it, not feeling that listened to today. Thank you all for being here
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Heading to Cape Cod Massachusetts. (Northeast USA) Itās where I grew up and my mom still lives.
Pic from last summer
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Oh wow, that is amazing. Off to google it now. Hope you have a really restful break.
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Checking in on day 3
Another really good one so far! Today is my second day working out, which feels great to get back into. Taking it really easy, and trying to not put unnecessary pressure on myself. Fixed myself up a bit todayā¦ā¦ Wore a dress, put makeup on, and washed my hair for the first time since drinking and smoking on Sundayā¦.
So fresh and so clean! Hahahaha
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Iām 20 years older than you and I want to stay young and foolish, but in a way that makes me feel happy within myself. I think my past life of staying young and foolish was a little cringeworthy, to be polite! 
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Thank you.
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Day 9.
Late check in,kind of a rough day but made it through.Eating some tacos and relaxing the rest of the night 
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Evening Check In
Day 549
Today has been a really restless day for me. Ive struggled alot with my ED. Even though i havent acted out on it, my mind has been really preoccupied with it. It has been an almost all day thing and ive done numerous things to keep it at bay. Im really working hard on changing problem behaviours in my life. Right now my problem behaviours which i still use to escape are my ED and my phone. Both of these things i turn to when i experience uncomfortable emotions. I can see that when i stopped using drugs and alcohol, other issues became more prominent. And im not liking how they have so much control over me (more so my ED than my phone, but still). I see myself making progress and im taking things one day at a time, just like i did with drugs. And i know that as long as i stay true to this path of healing and change, eventually i will have made new healthy habits for me to cope with my emotions. Im feeling optimistic and excited about my future, even tho i feel restless and on edge right now 
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