Checking in sober, day 1.
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Morning all, checking in on day 728. Didnāt accomplish much on my days off. Rained mostly and was so tired I slept way to much. Up early today and an overnight tonight and tomorrow and then a few days off. Looking forward to getting the nursery painted this weekend! Hope everyone is doing well and stays safe!
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Iām sorry to hear that. My husband is at the hospital as well. I can imagine how you feel at this moment.
I hope everything turns out to the best for all of you.
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My first ever second check-in. Still day 165. Iām totally knackered now. Had this brilliant idea to pressure wash the yard. Took me the best part of the day. Is it a general thing, or a user error on my part: you start to pressure wash something and everything gets a hell of a lot dirtier, before it gets clean? Including me. I was absolutely filthy!
But tonight Iām going to reward myself with fishānāchips and mushy peas from my trusted local chippy 
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Day 86 woke up super late. Havenāt had my mood stabilizer medicine, vraylar in the last couple days bc it gets sent in the mail and didnāt come in and itās just not been good. Iām not in a good headspace and I canāt do anything but try and suck it up. Iām grouchy, and snappy, Iām super emotional again and the last time I got off my mood stabilizer I relapsed. Not saying Iām going to relapse but I just feel like shit right now. Trying to just focus on being here for my girls much love.
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Day 76 check in. My daughter went to get the school bus by herself this morning which is the start of a new era for me. I found myself checking my phone to see if sheād made the journey ok, of course she had. This is just mama bear worrying over nothing. I did my breathing exercises (longest breath hold was 4 minutes), a guided meditation and then journaled for half an hour. Then it was time for my GP appointment which was a bit of a walk away.
When I got home from the doctors I laid some snacks out for the kids getting back from school and then I headed out to meet a friend for sketching and a chat. It was really nice and we made some plans to do something regularly.
Now weāre s all just relaxing ahead of an evening appointment to get my sonās hair cut. Heās feeling a bit apprehensive so Iāll go with him this time.
Iām just going to take a look at a cryptic crossword while Iām waiting.
Wishing everyone an addiction free day!
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Year 4, not sure of how many days. Birthday today, had contact from my parents and thatās got me all of a wobble. They are horrendous people. Taking myself off rock climbing. Steady hands.
Onwards!
X
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Second update with new updates from the hospital.
I also got to talk to my husband by video call, so the kids got to see that he is alive.
Far from okey though. They are going to keep him and planning to do another surgery. They didnāt succeed to do whatever they attempted to do last time. He is still in a lot of pain and is still a high risk patient. And he is going to stay for a while. Might be home at the end of next week if it doesnāt get worse.
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Happy Birthday 
Have fun rock climbing 
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Day 4
Back home without buying shit.
No cravings these days.
Itās hot and I had a lense check in the city and it was much to crowdy. I am not a person for that. I love silence. Now I have to relax. 
I did some recovery work and found void.
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Second check in today, Friday night and still sober, no alcohol in the house, I want to drink, which is why Iām on here talking, Iāve planned to go out a drive somewhere nice early tomorrow with my husband and Coops to keep me busy, thinking about driving early and sitting planning where we are going to go will hopefully keep my mind off alcohol tonight 
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Iām going to to stop update. Everytime I do something new happens.
More complications. High fever, like really high.
High infection, really swollen and they canāt perform the surgery in this state. They arenāt sure what to do. So they are just going to wait to see if it gets better or worse.
I wasnāt really worried before, but I am now.
Every time the hospital calls Iām holding my breath until theyāve said what they want to say.
Extremely grateful for their frequent updates and calls. But I also know that they wouldnāt keep it up if it wasnāt serious and high risk.
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Somewhere on this site in a thread of sobriety quotes I saw this:
Addiction is giving up everything for one thing.
Recovery is giving up that one thing for everything else.
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Big hugs my sweet friend. I canāt imagine what you and the kids are going through right now. Grateful that the hospital is keeping you updated. Iām so sorry that they are not able to perform the surgery at the is time - i do hope that his symptoms / infections clear up so that they are able to treat him.
Do know that we are here for you and sending out so many healing vibes to your husband. Keeping you in our thoughts and prayers. Much love Sophia! 
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I love that, cloudy! Thanks for sharing it hereā¦
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Thank you 
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Holding you, your husband and family in thought, prayers, and hopes that everything will be okay. Big hugs. I am glad your daughter is there during this difficult time. Hoping for the best for your husband. We are a support group and here for you. Hope you are doing okay as far as staying sober. I am so sorry all this is happening and just want him to be on the road to recovery.
@Saturn81 proud of you! Sounds like a good plan, thanks for checking in and continue to as much as you care to, want to, need to.
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Thank you,I really appreciate it.
Iām so glad Iām back here during all this. And that Iāve got all of you to talk to.
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Checking in! Hi everyone! Hope youāre all well. I havenāt checked in in a while. Itās been well over 3 years without alcohol in my life.
I finished my first official week at the preschool. I canāt believe I get paid to sing and dance and play playdoh with 4 year olds. Itās a church preschool and the Lead teacher is very religious. She told me she was doing yoga and she felt like she was worshiping the devil She said she needs to talk to her pastor about it. I will not be telling her about my āmoon checksā! Thatās for sureā¦
She will be out Monday so I get to run the class. I hope I can remember the dances.
All in all, life is good, I am happy where I am at. Will try to pop in for another update soon, love you all!
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Thinking of you and your husband and wishing him a smooth recovery. Cannot imagine how you must be feeling/dealing rught now, and hope you are able to take care of yourself. I know its hard to deal with guilt, but not your fault you didnt know what was wrong. Xo.
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